samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 Been thinking of making it somewhat a bit open. How will you take it if you were him? Here's what I'll accept under these revised rules I'm thinking: 1) Anything done online 2) Clubbing is allowed at whatever time, if he wants to and I get to go partying to if I got my friends 3) You can cam online 4) He's also allowed to kiss another woman if he wants to, but just kissing if done in real life.. ok maybe a bit of petting but that's just about it.... I'm just super bored right now... Nothing fun and parents arguing some stupid things again while I'm always left as a referree. Screw that, they should solve their problems like adults without putting me on their side... Anyways back to topic, what would any of you guys think, react??
Snowolf Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 I would be concerned that she would let me do that stuff. I'd think she's cheating on me while I'm out partying or something. -Sno
Author samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Author Posted October 30, 2009 I would be concerned that she would let me do that stuff. I'd think she's cheating on me while I'm out partying or something.I see and this is what I been thinking of telling bf for a while now. Thing is, if he comes to my country and we get married or we continue our relationship, I imagine watching or catching him on cam doing all those things. If he were to be alright with it, then it would be my free pass as well (only with a guy, I'm not bi)....
Snowolf Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 Wait, so you want him to do this stuff? I'm confused. -Sno
Author samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Author Posted October 30, 2009 Wait, so you want him to do this stuff? I'm confused.Yup... like I stated, I imagine catching him doing anything online with a woman or other women as well as a real life kissing/making out session to petting....
aerogurl87 Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 Yup... like I stated, I imagine catching him doing anything online with a woman or other women as well as a real life kissing/making out session to petting.... Umm well if you can imagine him doing that kind of stuff (which I consider to be cheating) then maybe you shouldn't even be thinking of marrying him.
Snowolf Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 But why do you want him to do it? Would you not just want him to be with you? -Sno
Author samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Author Posted October 30, 2009 Umm well if you can imagine him doing that kind of stuff (which I consider to be cheating) then maybe you shouldn't even be thinking of marrying him.I guess I must be weird but think I'm now starting to getting turn on by it somehow. Is sometime sooner the right time to tell him about this fantasy of mines??
Author samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Author Posted October 30, 2009 But why do you want him to do it? Would you not just want him to be with you?I don't know, guess it's my secret fantasy which he is unaware of. I like the idea of catching him doing those things.... He doesn't know this though.... And this is the same guy I been with.. Happens to be my first one. Guess that must be part of the reason behind this new me...
Snowolf Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 I don't think you should get married. My opinion. =\ It's just something that's not right. -Sno
Author samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Author Posted October 30, 2009 I don't think you should get married. My opinion. =\ It's just something that's not right.I'm committed, just that I don't have the mentality of being the typical stay-at-home mainly household wife that has to cook every single day or create kids.... ugh...
boogieboy Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 I doubt this is a new you, youre just comprimising the original you to avoid getting hurt. Once other people start showing up in this relationshipo cuz youre not enough for him, its over....but hey, I could be wrong.
Author samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Author Posted October 30, 2009 Once other people start showing up in this relationshipo cuz youre not enough for him, its over....but hey, I could be wrong.Or maybe I was not meant for traditonal rules... I don't know.... But see, ever since he met me, I did at one time told him he can do anything online, that I wouldn't mind, even with cam (I have never considered virtual im or camming cheating anways, in fact it turns me on). Tells me, why, if he has me... But that was 3 years ago. Maybe he might change now if I were to bring the topic back.... Don't think I would get hurt. I mean, if he were to hurt me then he losses, it's over right away....
Snowolf Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 I think your afraid of being hurt, so your letting him do it just so it doesn't suprise you. -Sno
aerogurl87 Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 I don't know, guess it's my secret fantasy which he is unaware of. I like the idea of catching him doing those things.... He doesn't know this though.... And this is the same guy I been with.. Happens to be my first one. Guess that must be part of the reason behind this new me... Umm you sound like this guy I was talking to awhile back. He thought it was sexy for his girlfriend to sleep around and for her to take pics of herself doing it (something I wasn't willing to do). But anyway, I think you should tell him about these thoughts if you really want him to carry them out since some people really are ok with stuff like that I've learned. Or you can keep it to yourself and as a secret fantasy which in my opinion would be the smart thing to do because telling him to do those things could be like opening Pandora's box.
Author samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Author Posted October 30, 2009 But anyway, I think you should tell him about these thoughts if you really want him to carry them out since some people really are ok with stuff like that I've learned. Or you can keep it to yourself and as a secret fantasy which in my opinion would be the smart thing to do because telling him to do those things could be like opening Pandora's box.I was thinking of telling him one of these days about those fantasies of mine. It would be cool if he were to consent to it though.... I'm guessing most guys would like that proposal since many get horny by nature. But then comes the other option, he might not be interested in it. You always hear about most guys into porn sites online and doing things online with women while it's typical the girl getting so worked up on that and soo upset to the point of crying. Hell even catching their man seeing a porn magazine gets them sooo stress out.
aerogurl87 Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 I was thinking of telling him one of these days about those fantasies of mine. It would be cool if he were to consent to it though.... I'm guessing most guys would like that proposal since many get horny by nature. But then comes the other option, he might not be interested in it. You always hear about most guys into porn sites online and doing things online with women while it's typical the girl getting so worked up on that and soo upset to the point of crying. Hell even catching their man seeing a porn magazine gets them sooo stress out. I think there is a big difference between having my boyfriend watch porn and having him cam with some random chick. I personally don't care if my boyfriend watches porn, hell I found some good porn for my ex when we were in a LDR which I guess caught him a little off guard, lol. But camming, or "interactive porn" as my ex called it, is on a whole other level. What if your bf catches feelings for the other woman he's making out with or camming with, what then? Are you going to get mad and leave him because of something you allowed him to do in the first place? Hearts are tricky and you can't predict how they will act, but there are reasons why most people who want to be in LTRs choose monogamous relationships opposed to open ones.
Author samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Author Posted October 30, 2009 What if your bf catches feelings for the other woman he's making out with or camming with, what then? Are you going to get mad and leave him because of something you allowed him to do in the first place? Hearts are tricky and you can't predict how they will act, but there are reasons why most people who want to be in LTRs choose monogamous relationships opposed to open ones.I suppost these things might happened but see there would already be rules and boundaries established on that. If he were to go beyond the boundaries then it's his loss, thus it would be over... But yes I get why most want to be in complete closed relationships, they are either not turn on by what I just wrote or are afraid things can go wrong. But if enough rules and boundaries follow by good communication is established, I think it can still last, I don't know, I assume it can.... If he were to agree with this then I would do the same with guys....
threebyfate Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 If we were to get married.. If we were to get married, that would make me bisexual and also, pretty soon, a bigamist. Edit - Oh, and your terms and conditions couldn't convince me to get married to you.
aerogurl87 Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 I suppost these things might happened but see there would already be rules and boundaries established on that. If he were to go beyond the boundaries then it's his loss, thus it would be over... But yes I get why most want to be in complete closed relationships, they are either not turn on by what I just wrote or are afraid things can go wrong. But if enough rules and boundaries follow by good communication is established, I think it can still last, I don't know, I assume it can.... If he were to agree with this then I would do the same with guys.... Believe me when you start to lay down rules and boundaries that conflict innate human nature (ex. you can make out with other girls but don't start to like them), it's probably not going to work. I've only seen a few open relationships last for a long time, but most don't. Just a word of caution.
SoulSearch_CO Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 I would be concerned that she would let me do that stuff. I'd think she's cheating on me while I'm out partying or something. -Sno Wait, so you want him to do this stuff? I'm confused. -Sno Dude -she's ALREADY doing the online stuff - go read some of her posts in the cheating forum.
Author samsungxoxo Posted October 30, 2009 Author Posted October 30, 2009 Dude -she's ALREADY doing the online stuff - go read some of her posts in the cheating forum.Nope not all that I mentioned above. And the only thing online I ever done was chat with a guy who I never plan to meet in real life in a sexual manner, writing, chatting about sex. But see I stop doing that for a while now, I'm bored.... plus not into making fun on people online...
Tiz Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 Here's a better idea. Instead of making a list for your fiance' make an appointment to a therapist in your area. Healthy people don't ask these kinds of questions and think along these lines. You actually want to start off your marriage with infidelity and a husband with no integrity. That's a sign of some deep problems.
boogieboy Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 Here's a better idea. Instead of making a list for your fiance' make an appointment to a therapist in your area. Healthy people don't ask these kinds of questions and think along these lines. You actually want to start off your marriage with infidelity and a husband with no integrity. That's a sign of some deep problems. This is her first love, shes not going to believe something is wrong...she doesnt want to even face the hurt of thinking that this wont work.
torranceshipman Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 Sounds like you shouldn't be getting married.......
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