betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 When I was about 15, one of my friends mothers told me to never date a man who disliked animals. I was too young to understand it then, but now 11 years later, i cannot agree with this statement more. Everyone is different, but as a general statement a man who decides he "hates" any type of animal is a red flag for me. I'm also an animal person, so this is of greater importance. I just think people who like animals tend to be more caring, compassionate people. My brother is very allergic to cats, so he'll avoid them, but he doesn't "hate" them. I don't know, I just find hating animals as creepy. What about if you hate snakes, giant fish and large spiders and scorpions? oh and octopii. I am deathly afraid of octopii.
Thornton Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 I am not a cat person (I prefer dogs and wouldn't choose to have a cat as a pet). However I would never be cruel or abusive towards an animal - I like all animals in general, and if I dated someone who had a cat I'd still feed it and stroke it etc. I agree with other people who have said that if someone is abusive towards an animal it's indicative of much deeper problems with anger and an inclination towards being abusive in general. If a guy disliked any animal I'd consider it to be a red flag, not just if it was a cat.
AD1980 Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 Never was a cat fan always preferred dogs For one im allergic and two most cats to me seem aloof and unfriendly unless its their owner allot of times However im not a hater i dont like to see cats or any animals mistreated
SoulSearch_CO Posted November 1, 2009 Posted November 1, 2009 My XH said he hated cats before we got them (and even for a good while after that). His reason, though, was when he was younger he nursed a homeless cat back to health that he found in the gutter and when it was well, it clawed the hell out of him and ran away. LOL He just saw them as mean animals compared to dogs. But he is definitely NOT the aggressive type and wouldn't dare physically abuse anybody. I don't think a statement about hating cats says anything about the guy in general - get to know him better, first.
paperchase Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 YOu're right about instinct, but cats scratch things because they have claws, and they need to keep them sharp. And yes, they go after moving things, because that's what cats do. I'm watching my kitties play with a shoelace right now. They're not gonna go to harvard, but they are both self aware and don't go nuts when they see a mirror. I think they also have short memories.. But dogs are instinctual too, though I think dogs have been far more domesticated than cats have... Dogs were once wolves, but the smallest toy poodle doesn't seem much like a wolf, but a cat looks pretty much just like the african cat it's descended from. They love scratching my couch because it's made basically out of burlap. When our cat was declawed for defacing the furniture, she continued to attempt to scratch it the way she always had. She pawed away as if she were sharpening her claws, but was in fact clawless.
Author jw90063 Posted November 2, 2009 Author Posted November 2, 2009 When our cat was declawed for defacing the furniture, she continued to attempt to scratch it the way she always had. She pawed away as if she were sharpening her claws, but was in fact clawless. I think declawing a cat is a bit cruel. Cats have claws for a reason, and taking that away doesn't seem right. What if they had to defend themselves from another animal, their claws take a big part in that. It is annoying when they scratch furniture etc, I have to say. I think there are ways to train them not to do that as much.
paperchase Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 I think declawing a cat is a bit cruel. Cats have claws for a reason, and taking that away doesn't seem right. What if they had to defend themselves from another animal, their claws take a big part in that. It is annoying when they scratch furniture etc, I have to say. I think there are ways to train them not to do that as much. I didn't do it. My wife did. It was her cat and it tore up everything no matter what we tried. I'm talking really expensive original mint antique furniture. For what it's worth, the cat never left the house during her 14 year life. She had no interest in going outside even if the door was left ajar. From what I could tell, she led a very good life of leisure.
paperchase Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 Declawing a cat is JUST like cutting off the tips of all your fingers. They don't take JUST the claws. It's mutilation. Please don't get any more cats. First of all. I never got a cat. I married a woman who had a cat. Secondly, it's not like cutting off your fingertips. In fact the nail is still there, it's just recessed to the point where it's difficult, though not impossible, to use it for clawing. Third, if animals are to be domesticated, there are tradeoffs. The spade and neuter them and do other things that can easily be called into question. One of the main point I made earlier in this post was that I don't think cats should really be domesticated.
Author jw90063 Posted November 2, 2009 Author Posted November 2, 2009 No. Sorry, but you are WRONG. It is the same as cutting your fingers off at the first joint. An excerpt from the following which was written by a veterinarian: "Your cat's claw is not a toenail. It is actually closely adhered to the bone. So closely adhered that to remove the claw, the last bone of your the cat's claw has to be removed. Declawing is actually an amputation of the last joint of your cat's "toes"." http://www.declawing.com/ Halloween is over
Crusoe Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 I have a very strong dislike for cats. Mainly because I used to run a small rescue home for abused and unwanted parrots and one of my biggest problems was cats trying to kill them. My other dislike of cats is that they crap everywhere and I am sick of cleaning cat crap from my garden. Dogs are my favourite animal, I spent 13 years living and working on rescue home and have cared for literally hundreds of them. Have yet to meet any cat that has the intelligence of a Border Collie, but also I cannot believe any cat could be less intelligent than a Greyhound. 99 times out of 100 a dog will start eating poop because of either a lack of nutrients, usually vitamin B, or because of digestion problems. Oh, I believe someone mentioned indoor dogs, very bad idea for many reasons but a lesser known and very important one is that dogs need lots of natural sunlight, it activates vitamin D, that in turn produces the hormone that regulates other nutrients in their bodies. Without sunlight their system just wont work properly.
carhill Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 (edited) Topically, I would be more interested in why the man (or woman) dislikes cats than the mere expression of the preference. Such revelations are good information. Anecdotally, my siamese fetches my glasses off the nightstand in the morning for me, as an indicator that it's time for me to get up, as well as opens cabinet doors by himself, crawls in, wanders or sleeps, then leaves, closing the door behind him. I've seen him do this to closet doors too. He'll open the pocket door to the laundry room where his litter box is. He follows me around the property like a dog, at my heel. You can see a picture of his usual position here. I've owned cats, dogs, snakes and iguanas. For my particular purposes, I like cats because they are relatively independent, keep the rodent and bird population in balance, are good companions and provide a nice heating blanket at night Edited November 2, 2009 by carhill
Author jw90063 Posted November 2, 2009 Author Posted November 2, 2009 Most of the time a man's excuse for not liking cats is "they were clawed by them before". That is exactly what one of my ex's told me. Um, yeah I'm sure they scratched him for no reason. They probably didn't add the fact that they harassed the cat prior to this. The cat was simply defending its self. I'm sure this makes the guy feel real low getting attacked by a small animal, so could explain some dislike towards cats. Funny thing is the ex who said he was once clawed, was yet clawed again by my cat. I didn't see this but he came until the other room to show me his hand. It was funny. She did not like him, and acted really weird around this guy. I think she knew he was up to know good.
TaleSpin Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 There are a lot of crazy cat people in this thread. Haha. I'm a girl. I don't like cats. I would probably prefer a man who also doesn't like cats. I have a Border Collie. She does not eat poop, does not roll in dead things, and is far smarter than any cat in existence. However, she has a strong prey drive and would probably kill a cat without hesitation, so if I were living with a man who had a cat, that would not turn out well. I would not want to date a man who didn't like dogs. So, if you have a cat, I can understand why a man not liking cats would be a deal-breaker. I'm an animal lover and I've worked in a few veterinary hospitals. The majority of dogs do not eat their own poop. Rolling in dead things... I don't really know about that, haha. I can imagine dogs and cats both would be pretty excited by dead things, since neither are above scavenging for food. I agree that a man who hates all animals in general is a red flag. I dated a guy when I was in and just out of high school that didn't like animals. He hated the dog I had then, a German Shepherd, and my horse. How can you hate a horse!? Anyway, he ended up being psychotic. I would be more understanding of someone who was afraid of dogs, cats, horses, or whatever. I still probably wouldn't want to date them though. Haha.
Skump Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 Men Who Hate/Dislike Cats.....Is this a red flag? You're thinking of dogs. Hatred of dogs is the red flag. Near this spot are deposited the remains of one who possessed Beauty without Vanity, Strength without Insolence, Courage without Ferocity, and all the Virtues of Man, without his Vices. This Praise, which would be unmeaning Flattery if inscribed over human ashes, is but a just tribute to the Memory of Boatswain, a Dog. - George Gordon, Lord Byron, Epitaph to a Dog
Crusoe Posted November 3, 2009 Posted November 3, 2009 I do believe your kitty is smiling in that pic, Carhill! When I told my mom the claims that dogs who eat animal poop are malnourished, she laughed. Do they also roll in dead animals for the same reason? Dogs roll in dead animals for two reasons, 1) instinct, the smell hides their scent from their prey and 2) they like the smell.
LithiumFlower Posted November 3, 2009 Posted November 3, 2009 Ah, some guys simply don't like cats... I know plenty of girls who don't like cats. It's nothing really alarming. Now, if they hate them to the point they're abusive toward an animal, that is a warning sign. My dad never liked cats, his g/f right now who he's thinking of marrying has two. He would never personally own a cat, but he accepts her love of cats, to the point of even taking care of them for a week when she visits her parents. Some people dislike dogs, reptiles, or other animals. It's just a preference.
LithiumFlower Posted November 3, 2009 Posted November 3, 2009 Most of the time a man's excuse for not liking cats is "they were clawed by them before". That is exactly what one of my ex's told me. Um, yeah I'm sure they scratched him for no reason. Nah, cats are truly finicky animals, often more so then dogs. Many of the cats I've known pick favorites. Some people they'll be absolutely nice to and rub up on, but other people they'll hiss and scratch at simple for trying to pet them or something. One time I was at a friend's sitting on the arm of the chair watching a movie with them, and their cat claws me out of nowhere! WTF? Turns out, where I was sitting was where that cat always sat, so... I was basically pissing it off by sitting in it's territory. I just laughed and moved. Basically, cats scratch for a reason, yes, but it's mostly that they're picky animals and have a lot of personality and zest. One of the many things that make them unique, and one of the things that make them only right for certain people.
Author jw90063 Posted November 3, 2009 Author Posted November 3, 2009 One time I was at a friend's sitting on the arm of the chair watching a movie with them, and their cat claws me out of nowhere! WTF? Turns out, where I was sitting was where that cat always sat, so... I was basically pissing it off by sitting in it's territory. I just laughed and moved. Yeah, exactly what my ex said. He was just sitting on couch, but supposedly he reached down next to couch where the cat was, and she clawed him. How do you know it necessarily had anything to do with that being its spot. Maybe it didn't like you for some reason.
LithiumFlower Posted November 3, 2009 Posted November 3, 2009 Yeah, exactly what my ex said. He was just sitting on couch, but supposedly he reached down next to couch where the cat was, and she clawed him. How do you know it necessarily had anything to do with that being its spot. Maybe it didn't like you for some reason. Gee, maybe because afterward my friend specifically told me that cat claws at anyone who sits in that spot? And that cat let me pet it profusely both before and after it clawed me? And that it comes up and nuzzles with me every time I go up to their house? He reached down next to the cat was and she clawed him? Your right, the cat did claw him for a reason. She was PLAYING. I've known many cats to randomly come up and claw at my hand or something if it's hanging off a couch. Do they mean to hurt? No, they're just playing. Heck, most cats will claw at anything that's hanging down, whether it be a string or an arm. Most my friends raise their cats to where they're conditioned to think it's alright to claw at humans in certain circumstance. When I was little, I'd let my old kitten claw, bite, and wrestle with my arm when it wanted to play. And it continued to do that most it's life. Do I hate cats for the way they can play, or the fact they can be finicky? No, in fact, I adore it. Do some people not like the form of behavior that cats have? Yes.
rickigal Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 I dislike cats. I wouldn't consider myself a bad person because I do. To each his own. Personally I think guys that dote over cats are a little creepy but that's just me. I suppose I would tolerate one or two if I met the right man but I would never own one myself.
Yukikazi Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 I have 2 cats and I'm a guy.. I love them both and would kill or otherwise maim anyone who hurt them. I have no problems with any pets. If someone dosen't like cats.. then they never get invited to my place. If they got a problem with that.. tough.. my cats come first over anyone cause they have been with me for longer then any girl has and their love is unconditional. Did I want cats?? no.. but 1 adopted me and chose me so i kept him (he was stray kitten).. years later my schedule kept me away from home alot so i got a shelter cat to keep him company. Will i replace them when they are gone.. doubtful.. hair is annoying. Will I get rid of them.. never. Now the OP question was is it a red flag.. leaving animal abusers aside.. most of you still haven't answered why it would be a red flag. I.e. why would a guy with 2 cats be any less then a guy w/o pets? (barring allergies).. what is it about a guy with cats that turns off girls so much? Some of us don;t have time to deal with walking and exercising a dog.. so a cats the next best thing. So why is it weird for a guy to have or prefer cats over dogs?? or is it just the stupid stereotype of their something being wrong with a guy that has a cat or 2?
samspade Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 Was reading some other posts, and I got the idea to start a thread on this topic. As you know, a lot of men do not like cats, or hate them. There are some who don't mind them or actually really like them. From experience, it seems the guys who do not like cats are the very aggressive nature type men, or even ones who tend to be abusive. Ladies, what are your experiences with cats and men? Further more, what do men on here actually think of cats? Do you care if your partner has one? Do you think something is wrong with a man if he doesn't like cats? Is that a red flag to you? I've always had guys say they are allergic to cats as a reason to dodge them, but I think it may be just be an excuse. Also, one guy said he hated cats because most of them are mean. I find this totally untrue, although there are mean cats out there in the world. I don't like cats much, but I'm not big on animals in the house. But every person has an opinion on certain pets, so I don't think it's indicative of some overall disposition. For me, it's just the fact that I don't like boxes of ***** in the house and torn upholstery. (And I'm allergic.) On a related note, women who live alone with dogs bother me more. They are often attention-mongers.
sedgwick Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 (edited) I had a bf who was very allergic (not just an excuse, he really would start sneezing and his eyes would get all red) and it was a problem because he couldn't sleep over. We always had to spend the night at his place. My cats are like my children and I love it when guys like them, but it's not like I'd dump someone just for not being a cat lover. That said, the two exes with whom I'm still good friends are the two who have cats. I don't think it's a coincidence that they're the most caring and gentle people I've ever dated. Edited November 11, 2009 by sedgwick
sedgwick Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 Dogs will go get it. Cats will stare at you like you are crazy and not move. Well of course. What's in it for them to go get a stick? I did have a friend whose cat played fetch with rubber bands if you shot them down the hallway.
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