Sam Spade Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 And frankly if a girl isn't into me enough to want to jump my bones early on anyway, I'm wasting my time. That's the rationale. If a girl doesn't want to have sex with you in a reasonable time, that's a loud and clear indication that she's not that into you, and thus it's best for everybody to quit playin' and cut their losses.
jw90063 Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 That's the rationale. If a girl doesn't want to have sex with you in a reasonable time, that's a loud and clear indication that she's not that into you, and thus it's best for everybody to quit playin' and cut their losses. What is reasonable in your book, a few days? LOL Actually, that is not always the case. I think girls OR some guys can be very much into the other person, but hold out on the sex. That is one reason some choose to wait to have sex for that very reason, because they are very into the person, as well as personal beliefs in waiting.
Sam Spade Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 The problem is that (for the most part) when a woman has sex with a man she's attracted to, she often feels a bond for him. A lot of guys don't realize that girls withholding sex isn't a "game," it's the fact that she knows she's giving him an important part of her and if she does and he still doesn't want to commit, then she will feel used and cheap with a broken heart.) I realize that, and that's precisely why there is no commitment before sex. I've never interacted with a woman with the intention of ONLY sleeping with her, so it's only fair.
espec10001 Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Not all women can bend the psyche of a man. The beautiful ones, the stunning ones, yes, quite powerful indeed. I've seen powerful women and it comes from the power of their beauty, a natural earthly beauty that is quite difficult for the man to resist. The ones that will drive the man mad and cause him to lose sense, yes, those are the ones you should stay away from. Because these females understand the power of their beauty. They come in many forms including feminine snakes and black spiders, who will sap and poison the man's mind should he fall for them.
Sam Spade Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 What is reasonable in your book, a few days? LOL Actually, that is not always the case. I think girls OR some guys can be very much into the other person, but hold out on the sex. That is one reason some choose to wait to have sex for that very reason, because they are very into the person, as well as personal beliefs in waiting. Reasonable time can be anywhere from a few dates, to a few months depending on particular circumstances. My point is that if two people like each other (and begin to find themselves on the same couch in private on a regular basis), there is really no reason not to have sex, unless there are hidden agendas or some other issues in play. But, once there is an explicit conversation "No, I want to wait before sex because (insert whatever is your favorite reason)", I'd check out. Interestingly, I've never had to hear this in person, but apparently, judging from these boards it is common.
Sam Spade Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Not all women can bend the psyche of a man. The beautiful ones, the stunning ones, yes, quite powerful indeed. I've seen powerful women and it comes from the power of their beauty, a natural earthly beauty that is quite difficult for the man to resist. The ones that will drive the man mad and cause him to lose sense, yes, those are the ones you should stay away from. Because these females understand the power of their beauty. They come in many forms including feminine snakes and black spiders, who will sap and poison the man's mind should he fall for them. I'm immune . Once the lights are out, boobies and booty are all the same .
betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Reasonable time can be anywhere from a few dates, to a few months depending on particular circumstances. My point is that if two people like each other (and begin to find themselves on the same couch in private on a regular basis), there is really no reason not to have sex, unless there are hidden agendas or some other issues in play. But, once there is an explicit conversation "No, I want to wait before sex because (insert whatever is your favorite reason)", I'd check out. Interestingly, I've never had to hear this in person, but apparently, judging from these boards it is common. I think the general rule is, if she's not religious, if she doesn't have sex with you by the third date, she's not interested in you. This chick I know says she uses guys for free meals with times are rough for her..
espec10001 Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 I'm immune . Once the lights are out, boobies and booty are all the same . If I presented to you a woman with all the physical features you desire, your "dream girl", do you think you could resist?
Sam Spade Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 If I presented to you a woman with all the physical features you desire, your "dream girl", do you think you could resist? Yes, i'd resist no problem! Porn provides all the dream girls I could well... dream of, and once you rub one out, you tipically ask yourself what's the big deal anyway - even the hottest star stops doing it for you at some point . Conversely, my current gf deviates from my ideal (girls built like young boys), since she has a real butt but I'm fantasising about her all the time nevertheless . (and off-topic, i think this is one of the greatest benefits of porn - to easily demonstrate that the pursuit of sexual variety is just not worth it; i'd argue that it is more common that porn prevents cheating, rather than encourages it)
jw90063 Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 I think the general rule is, if she's not religious, if she doesn't have sex with you by the third date, she's not interested in you. This chick I know says she uses guys for free meals with times are rough for her.. That's a general rule? That's rather sad. I think for some waiting, its not a religious matter. It's more like they would like to get to know the person a bit better(such as their last name, or if they screwed the entire town), before going to that level. That's just common sense if you ask me.
betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 That's a general rule? That's rather sad. I think for some waiting, its not a religious matter. It's more like they would like to get to know the person a bit better(such as their last name, or if they screwed the entire town), before going to that level. That's just common sense if you ask me. That's what I thought as well, until I found out in practice, most women expect it. I had a bunch of nice dates, and didn't want to pressure anything, we made out a couple of times. Then the morning after the last time we made out, she called up and said she prefers guys who are more aggressive. I thought I was being respectful and patient, and she basically wanted me to jump her. You lose out a lot more by taking things slowly with women than by being aggressive. Sure, some women don't want to take things so quickly, they'll view it as a lack of confidence or aggression.. Even with me, I'm a total dork, I'm used to having sex on the 1st-3rd dates, like it's expected by her. I know couples that have been together for years who met the same night they first had sex....
jw90063 Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 I had a bunch of nice dates, and didn't want to pressure anything, we made out a couple of times. Then the morning after the last time we made out, she called up and said she prefers guys who are more aggressive. I thought I was being respectful and patient, and she basically wanted me to jump her. Well, you made out, that should have been enough at first. I've heard this same story from guys before. Basically the girl has low self esteem. She wants to rush in and sleep with the guy in frantic attempt to keep him. The girl also thinks if she doesn't jump in and have sex right away, he won't stick around. Clearly, this is true for some men. Also, If she thought she was worthy or had anything more to offer besides her body, she would wait no matter what. Then there is of course she might just be a female player or after sex. That could explain why some of those girls broke it off with you, just because you didn't jump their bones immediately.
betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Well, you made out, that should have been enough at first. I've heard this same story from guys before. Basically the girl has low self esteem. She wants to rush in and sleep with the guy in frantic attempt to keep him. The girl also thinks if she doesn't jump in and have sex right away, he won't stick around. Clearly, this is true for some men. Also, If she thought she was worthy or had anything more to offer besides her body, she would wait no matter what. Then there is of course she might just be a female player or after sex. That could explain why some of those girls broke it off with you, just because you didn't jump their bones immediately. She just wants VERY aggressive guys... I dont' think this chick was in any desperation to "keep" a guy. She knew I liked her a lot. she just wanted a much more sexually aggressive guy. She even said "I know you like me a lot, but I like men to be more aggressive"... She knows she could have me, she wanted someone more aggressive. That's her choice.. But all I'm saying is that there is no shortage of women who would hold it against you if you didn't try to have sex with them early on..
Krytie TV Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Now, before I get creamed by a lot of females on here... :love::bunny::love: Begin creaming ladies!!!
ADF Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 (edited) Boy dreamgrl, you are gonna make a lot of the men on here REALLY happy with your post. Way to suck up (kidding)! Sure, members of either gender can use sex as a weapon. However, I do think men do it more and that it often plays out more toxically for women than for men. Edited October 29, 2009 by ADF
Author dreamergrl Posted October 29, 2009 Author Posted October 29, 2009 I think the OP wanted a debate by the sound of this thread. The OP wanted to debate the fact of whether or not there are female players in that sense. Boy dreamgrl, you are gonna make a lot of the men on here REALLY happy with your post. Way to suck up (kidding)! Sure, members of either gender can use sex as a weapon. However, I do think men do it more and that it often plays out more toxically for women than for men. I agree men do it more, but I think it's becoming more common for females to do this. I don't believe all females say they want to wait for the right reason. I think some use it as a ploy to keep the guy, the same way some guys say they want a relationship to have sex with with the girl. That is why I said 'female players'.
Awesome Username Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 The OP wanted to debate the fact of whether or not there are female players in that sense. I agree men do it more, but I think it's becoming more common for females to do this. I don't believe all females say they want to wait for the right reason. I think some use it as a ploy to keep the guy, the same way some guys say they want a relationship to have sex with with the girl. That is why I said 'female players'. So in that sense, is a women who has a lot of guy friends who isn't sleeping with them even though they possibly would if you offered...a female player? Because the word "player" denotes that there is more than one guy in the picture, but you're not giving it up. I'm not trying to be a smartass, I just want an honest answer.
Author dreamergrl Posted October 29, 2009 Author Posted October 29, 2009 So in that sense, is a women who has a lot of guy friends who isn't sleeping with them even though they possibly would if you offered...a female player? Because the word "player" denotes that there is more than one guy in the picture, but you're not giving it up. I'm not trying to be a smartass, I just want an honest answer. I don't think a person has to be having more then one person in the picture to be playing though. They can get what they want from the person at the time, and then move on to the next. Claiming to offer what is wanted to get what they want, or offering something in the future to get what they want. I also never said it was a woman who is friends with the guy.
Tony Posted October 29, 2009 Senior Moderators Posted October 29, 2009 The majority of the last 50 posts are off topic. That's very sad and not a great tribute to our members who do work so very hard to respect the OP and stay on topic. I regret but this thread is so far off topic it is no longer useful. CLOSED!
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