Author betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Author Posted October 29, 2009 Dealbreakers: 1. Girl absolutely has to be intelligent or it's just not going to work at all. 2. No drugs/smoking. Alcohol is okay, but if you're clearly addicted if you make really foolish decisions when drunk -- no way. 3. No ambition -- doesn't enjoy challenge. 4. Financially irresponsible. 5. Dishonest. 6. Overly reactive. 7. Not very sexual. 8. Unwilling to hold hands in public/hug/kiss/etc... I enjoy light PDA once in a while This isn't really a dealbreaker, but I'd be really upset if someone was anti-PDA. 9. Someone who is unable to take responsiblity for their own actions and blames others all the time. 10. Someone who isn't compatible with the fact that I am a bit of a nerd at heart More like a huge nerd, but who's keeping track? Hate to say this, but Penn alums are a red flag for me. I've dated several and they have all been nightmares.
honeypear Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Dealbreakers: 1. Girl absolutely has to be intelligent or it's just not going to work at all. 2. No drugs/smoking. Alcohol is okay, but if you're clearly addicted if you make really foolish decisions when drunk -- no way. 3. No ambition -- doesn't enjoy challenge. 4. Financially irresponsible. 5. Dishonest. 6. Overly reactive. 7. Not very sexual. 8. Unwilling to hold hands in public/hug/kiss/etc... I enjoy light PDA once in a while This isn't really a dealbreaker, but I'd be really upset if someone was anti-PDA. 9. Someone who is unable to take responsiblity for their own actions and blames others all the time. 10. Someone who isn't compatible with the fact that I am a bit of a nerd at heart More like a huge nerd, but who's keeping track? Define financially irresponsible. What if you are in debt up to your ears because of an ex? Does that count?
Author betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Author Posted October 29, 2009 Define financially irresponsible. What if you are in debt up to your ears because of an ex? Does that count? Why would you be in debt up to your ears because of an ex? If they took your CCs and used them, you should have stopped it right after it started.. About the only bad credit/debt situation I could tolerate are student loans and medical expenses, but not maxed out credit cards and all sorts of defaults and lawsuits and creditors coming after them. No way.
Vertex Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Hate to say this, but Penn alums are a red flag for me. I've dated several and they have all been nightmares. LOL, all I can say to that is not all Penn alums are the same!
Awesome Username Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Good stuff I've seen on here so far: Has kids he doesn't see Good Enough Diploma the word "Soulmate" Hatred toward mother/father Another few goodies I've thought of: When in a relationship with you, always talks about how good it's gonna be when he finally moves Been to jail "I usually only hit on Asian girls, but I'll make an exception for you." (really happened) Burning hatred for all of his exes Talks badly about other women all the time Gets really pissed off if you're a few minutes late for something (arrgh) Can't take spicy food or is vegetarian or some other thing that inhibits him loving food as much as me.
Vertex Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Define financially irresponsible. What if you are in debt up to your ears because of an ex? Does that count? Depends on what the situation was regarding the ex. I consider someone financially irresponsible if they're needless spenders/unable to make sound financial decisions regarding future budgeting/etc.
Author betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Author Posted October 29, 2009 LOL, all I can say to that is not all Penn alums are the same! I know. But I will not date anyone from Philadelphia, ever again, even if they offer me money.
Author betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Author Posted October 29, 2009 Good stuff I've seen on here so far: Has kids he doesn't see Good Enough Diploma the word "Soulmate" Hatred toward mother/father Another few goodies I've thought of: When in a relationship with you, always talks about how good it's gonna be when he finally moves Been to jail "I usually only hit on Asian girls, but I'll make an exception for you." (really happened) Burning hatred for all of his exes Talks badly about other women all the time Gets really pissed off if you're a few minutes late for something (arrgh) Can't take spicy food or is vegetarian or some other thing that inhibits him loving food as much as me. I don't see GED being a problem. They have been known to go to Ivy League schools. You don't know their situation. I aspire to be a vegetarian, though I love spicy food.
honeypear Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Why would you be in debt up to your ears because of an ex? If they took your CCs and used them, you should have stopped it right after it started.. About the only bad credit/debt situation I could tolerate are student loans and medical expenses, but not maxed out credit cards and all sorts of defaults and lawsuits and creditors coming after them. No way. It is possible that it does happen. I am not talking about credit cards. I am talking about someone who intentionally deceives you, withdraws all the money from the joint chequing account and runs up debt before taking off. You are left holding the bag. Because your a couple you are responsible as they were. So a woman that is in a abusive relationship, gets herself out starts paying the debts because she is deemed legally responsible does so. Moves on with her life. Because of this you can not tolerate?
Author betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Author Posted October 29, 2009 Good stuff I've seen on here so far: Has kids he doesn't see Good Enough Diploma the word "Soulmate" Hatred toward mother/father Another few goodies I've thought of: When in a relationship with you, always talks about how good it's gonna be when he finally moves Been to jail "I usually only hit on Asian girls, but I'll make an exception for you." (really happened) Burning hatred for all of his exes Talks badly about other women all the time Gets really pissed off if you're a few minutes late for something (arrgh) Can't take spicy food or is vegetarian or some other thing that inhibits him loving food as much as me. Another one is "perfect" anything. My ex talked about wanting a perfect relationship, which is basically like soulmate, but in another way of describing it. I should have known, but at least now I learned that those types have unrealistic expectations.
Vertex Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 It is possible that it does happen. I am not talking about credit cards. I am talking about someone who intentionally deceives you, withdraws all the money from the joint chequing account and runs up debt before taking off. You are left holding the bag. Because your a couple you are responsible as they were. So a woman that is in a abusive relationship, gets herself out starts paying the debts because she is deemed legally responsible does so. Moves on with her life. Because of this you can not tolerate? As long as someone is able to adequately manage their debt, I don't see that as being irresponsible. I've got a ton of debt from my college loans, but it doesn't make me financially irresponsible because I know how to handle it and still make money on the margin to allow me to do whatever I want with my life. On another note, though, it's usually a good idea to get with someone with similar financial goals. Personally, I'm a "separate accounts for personal expenses and joint account for joint expenses" kind of guy.
Awesome Username Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 I don't see GED being a problem. They have been known to go to Ivy League schools. You don't know their situation. I aspire to be a vegetarian, though I love spicy food. I completely understand that there are different situations regarding GEDs, just as there are different situations for people with their exes or even people who have had to go to jail. It isn't a dealbreaker, it's a read flag. Everyone has a few red flags, as nobody is perfect. Sometimes these "red flag" situations actually add character to a person. However, it's still a red flag.
honeypear Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 As long as someone is able to adequately manage their debt, I don't see that as being irresponsible. I've got a ton of debt from my college loans, but it doesn't make me financially irresponsible because I know how to handle it and still make money on the margin to allow me to do whatever I want with my life. On another note, though, it's usually a good idea to get with someone with similar financial goals. Personally, I'm a "separate accounts for personal expenses and joint account for joint expenses" kind of guy. Oh trust me I agree with this big time now. It only took 10 years to find out..BUT I agree with you
Awesome Username Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 As long as someone is able to adequately manage their debt, I don't see that as being irresponsible. I've got a ton of debt from my college loans, but it doesn't make me financially irresponsible because I know how to handle it and still make money on the margin to allow me to do whatever I want with my life. On another note, though, it's usually a good idea to get with someone with similar financial goals. Personally, I'm a "separate accounts for personal expenses and joint account for joint expenses" kind of guy. Yeah, the 100 percent joint account thing is not for me either.
Author betamanlet Posted October 29, 2009 Author Posted October 29, 2009 I completely understand that there are different situations regarding GEDs, just as there are different situations for people with their exes or even people who have had to go to jail. It isn't a dealbreaker, it's a read flag. Everyone has a few red flags, as nobody is perfect. Sometimes these "red flag" situations actually add character to a person. However, it's still a red flag. A good friend of mine has a GED, and he is 10000000x more successful with women than I am, and I have a college, law school, post law school grad degree.... It does bother him that he has it though.
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