masaki1085 Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 I've been on 4 exceptional dates in the past two and half weeks with a great girl. It has been going REALLY well in all aspects, and both of us have admitted to each other that we really like each other and spending time with each other. Unfortunately, timing-wise, she left on a week-long vacation the day after our last date on Monday night. Before she left, I made sure it was okay to be in touch phone-call wise while she was away (which, of course, it was). We've been shooting a few texts back and forth, here and there over the past two days around her traveling (initiated on both ends), but neither of us have called each other yet. In this world of the "he's/she's just not that into you" logic and the "invisible rules" of the dating game, I tend to get into the habit of overthinking about things. As plain and simply dumb as this might sound--I don't know whether to call her tonight or tomorrow. Because we are just starting to date, I want to be respectful her space while she is away and give her time to enjoy her vacation and visit her friend--she arrived at her destination yesterday evening and just began her vacation today. But then I begin wondering if she's waiting for my call (Calling tomorrow, it would be 4 nights after our 4th date). In contrast, I don't think a call tonight would be considered a bother or unwelcomed, either. But in the back of my mind (and I don't know why), I begin wondering if she would think "he's calling me already?" (Calling tonight, it would be 3 nights after our 4th date). Again, we've been texting back and forth here and there since she left (me wishing her safe travels yesterday; her texting me when she arrived and wishing me a good day at work, etc.). Yes, I know I'm overthinking--I should just call when I want. But its on my mind, and I wondered if there was any advice on what you would do in my shoes? Have any of you been in a similar situation before? Also, given this situation, how often would you call throughout the entire vacation? Many thanks.
Phateless Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 If she's on vacation I would let her call you. The last thing you want is to seem needy or clingy or like you're moving too fast. I would advise you to keep up with what you've been doing but to wait for her to call you while she's on vacation.
New Again Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 If you said you would call her, and you want to call her, just go for it. Since she's on vacation, just be respectful of her time (ie, call her, but keep it short, like under 10 minutes). You definitely SHOULD call at some point, since you asked her about calling...but I really don't think it matters WHEN you call. To answer your other question, I haven't been in that specific situation (only having been on 4 dates, then going on vacation, or him going on vacation), but when my bf and I first started dating (and weren't exclusive or serious or anything) he called and texted me as much as possible when he was on vacation or taking a long weekend somewhere; he would text/call me, but a lot less, leaving most of the communication up to me when I was elsewhere (letting me know he was thinking of me/interested, but not being overbearing or anything). Also, if he had bad cell service (I think twice when he went to the country) he let me know, either when he was in town and had service, or by emailing me.
Author masaki1085 Posted October 28, 2009 Author Posted October 28, 2009 If you said you would call her, and you want to call her, just go for it. Since she's on vacation, just be respectful of her time (ie, call her, but keep it short, like under 10 minutes). You definitely SHOULD call at some point, since you asked her about calling...but I really don't think it matters WHEN you call. Yeah, that's what I was thinking. I didn't want to necessarily wait for her to call me, because I communicated to her that I would call her. when my bf and I first started dating (and weren't exclusive or serious or anything) he called and texted me as much as possible when he was on vacation or taking a long weekend somewhere; he would text/call me, but a lot less, leaving most of the communication up to me when I was elsewhere (letting me know he was thinking of me/interested, but not being overbearing or anything). More often than not, when I call her I usually get voicemail--she usually doesn't use/check her phone if she's busy. Depending on when I call, I'm expecting her voicemail--so I planned on leaving a message (letting her know that I'm thinking of her) and leaving it be (not being overbearing) until she is able to return it (as I have typically done thus far--she always gets back to me in some form or another). I have to also be understanding that she's also 3 hours behind me, where she's located-haha.
dreamergrl Posted October 28, 2009 Posted October 28, 2009 Well you've been texting back and forth... why not end a text with saying "I look forward to talking to you when you get back"
boogieboy Posted October 29, 2009 Posted October 29, 2009 Dont call her, let her initiate any contact while shes on vacation. Let her miss you.
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