ekt21 Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 So here is my story, I'm a 19 years old I was with my ex boyfriend for almost a year of my freshman year of college. Everything was good, we practically lived together for the entire relationship. Then he dumps me out of the blue over a txt message saying that it wasn't going in the direction he wanted it to go. Yet he didn't communicate with me the reasons why and stuff cause if i knew that i could have worked on some stuff or whatever. After he dumped me I kept NO CONTACT for 2 months i deleted him out of my life pretty much. Then when school started up again i knew i was going to run into him sooner or later and so i did. We run into each other every week, and one day i get a txt from him and long story short I find myself in his room sleeping with him. Just to add he was my first "serious relationship" and i turned in my v card to him. So i ended up getting hurt all over again. Will i ever get over him? I keep no contact now its been 2 weeks. But why does this time it seems so much harder? Its just so hard when i know I'm going run into him at school, and we have so much mutual friends together. I can't escape him! I need some advice please!
xpaperxcutx Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 I don't think running away is a good solution. Yes, NC is important, but the course of it requires you to have determination and support. Support you can find in friends, family, and here, but determination come from yourself and how you deal with the situation if you happen to come across him again. Ask yourself what is your priority. School is your number 1 priority. That does not mean you should let him ruin your life at college. Go about your routine ( if you have one), and worry about the things that are important to you. It's a hard step to follow especially if you're trying to avoid someone, but I know you can do it.
shineonu Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 if you are sure you are going to run into him again, then this is what you do. Continue with NC. then as soon as you see him, immediately recall how bad he's hurt you and get a little angry about it. then keep walking. if he follows, get a little more angry. but don't show it, otherwise, he'll see it as weakness. be pleasant and tell him to leave you alone then walk away. i know how hard this is. but you are going to learn from the experience and come out tougher on the other end. good luck
Author ekt21 Posted October 25, 2009 Author Posted October 25, 2009 Thank you for your advice, it just all so hard. I moved home after we broke up and we were on different islands so i didnt have that chance that i was going to run into him. I think after we slept together after no contact for two months..it just totally set back my healing process. I have no hope in myself that i can really get over him. Its so hard, i could do the no contact thing really easy when we first broke up and now it seems impossible! IT doesnt make it any better that we do have ALOT of mutual friends together in which i still talk and hangout with! uuuugh im loosing it!
shineonu Posted October 27, 2009 Posted October 27, 2009 Thank you for your advice, it just all so hard. I moved home after we broke up and we were on different islands so i didnt have that chance that i was going to run into him. I think after we slept together after no contact for two months..it just totally set back my healing process. I have no hope in myself that i can really get over him. Its so hard, i could do the no contact thing really easy when we first broke up and now it seems impossible! IT doesnt make it any better that we do have ALOT of mutual friends together in which i still talk and hangout with! uuuugh im loosing it! yep, it's hard. this is coming from a guy who was married for 10 years and is recently divorced....oh, and lost his job in the process. Concentrate on your school. You're are much tougher than you think you are. You just probably haven't had the experience yet...and that's exactly what this is. good luck.
Author ekt21 Posted October 28, 2009 Author Posted October 28, 2009 Thank you, yes I dont have a lot of experience on my belt with relationships since it was my first serious relationship. But I hope to come out of this stronger and wiser! I need to move on...
Recommended Posts