SoConfusledandHurt Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 Goodbye! Im not sure. I tried no contact. Let me preface this by saying that my ex was very clear that he would always love me, and that I could always call him anytime. I was so pissed that he didnt stop me from moving out, as I expected him to...that I went and moved to another state and left him. He felt horrible about me telling him that his actions were causing me a lot of stress and as he is very prideful...I suppose thats why he let me go the way he did. I just couldnt take the no contact, because everytime I did contact him...I would become SO angry. My last posts show the flucuation of emotion I was dealing with constantly. I never felt this was right...but also never felt he was doing anything to stop it, either...the nerve! Well as it turns out, by posting here and reading your replies I decided I owed it to myself for one final truthful talk with my ex fiance. After all I had been so angry that I hadnt even stood the chance to do this before. What happened was my daughter called him and they talked...directly after she started to tell me she wanted to go back to daddies house and missed him. I felt bad and texted him that I missed him lots! He doesnt text, like EVER...and he texted me back that he missed me lots too. I then decided it was now or never just to keep anger out of it...and tell him how I feel about this situation. So I called him last night after the kiddos were in bed and I began the conversation by telling him that I love him and miss him very much. And then just proceeded to talk to him about our demise. We talked logically. I cried a lot, but did not get angry. We expressed concerns and truths of our relationship. It was really nice, he let me say anything I needed to...I told him that I would be moving on...and not waiting for him to decide if he wants our fam or not...and he expressed that it was not fair for him to ask me to wait...but that he just didnt know why he was able to treat us that way, and he wanted to find out first before he did anything. I told him to do what he needed to do and that I would just deal with it. I told him I needed to hear him say to me that he was ready for us to be over and done...because before that he had told me about keeping my ring being a good thing and said several times that he wanted us to get back together...I was so confused because he was completely ignoring me. He told me he could not say that yet to me, because he wasnt sure. And that he knows he cant ask me to wait around but he wished I didnt find anyone else! I told him that he was right, but also that I did understand where he was coming from. Well we hung up on good terms and he said he was relieved that he felt like he could actually call me once in awhile, because before he was scared of how angry I was. Well this morning when I got home from church and checked my email there was one from him saying "hey..when you get the kiddos to bed, if you have time, Id like to talk." Now I dont know if this is a good or bad thing...or which is good or bad...lol...Its either he is going to tell me he wants me to come home OR he is going to tell me its over for good. Im not sure...but think I have the idea that its going to be to ask me to come home... Now the thing is, I worked my ass off to move out of state and spent well over 2500.00...I couldnt just pick up and move back...so Im thinking he knows this and will ask for a long distance thing...maybe...Im not sure... Just thought Id update my story...thanks for reading!
Recommended Posts