SValentine Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 I was looking through my phone inbox today and i came across some of my ex's old messages that i never wanted to delete. It was pretty nostalgic, i must say. Even after we broke up and she got together with this new guy, we stayed friends. We did have many fights in between, some close to the point of ending our friendship, but she never wanted to. She always said that i meant alot to her and she didn't want to lose me as a friend. Its been 8 months since then and we don't talk anymore. Why would she have said all that before and things turned out so differently now? I still miss her a lot though.
Devil Inside Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 Sorry...it is hard to go back and read things like that after the fact. I'm sure she really felt that way...THEN. Things change, people change, feelings change. It is a painful reality of life, especially when our feelings remain the same. Acceptance is a place that you will reach with more time. Be gentle with yourself.
boogieboy Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 Oh boy, i been there. She wanted to stay friends, because if you cut her off, it would have been too difficult for her to move on. So staying in touch with you, helped her get over you while she moved on. Once she was over you completely, she didnt need to talk to you anymore. BTW anything she told you during the breakup was a lie. Remember that next time you deal with a breakup. Cut it off completely, dont let them use you for their benefit.
littlebittle Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 I had this boyfriend who I really liked a lot, and I remember telling him that I always wanted to be his friend, no matter what happened to us. I really meant it, too. Even after we broke up, I felt that way for a good while (and he was the one who dumped me). Now it's been something like 7 years since I spoke to him, and I don't ever miss him or think about him. People change. But I'm sure she meant what she said.
Eisenhower Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 The answer is she meant it when she said it. I had a stack of love letters from my ex pledging undying love, that I was "perfect" and that she wanted me, her and her kids to be together forever. When we broke up, I sent all the letters back to her. Why? I'm not sure. I think I wanted her to read them for some reason. I didn't want to keep them because they hurt too much to read knowing that she changed. She probably threw them away, I don't know, but it seemed to me that it served no purpose in me keeping them. In my case, she was coming out of a divorce and I think she overreacted and was overethusiastic in our relationship because she'd never had a "good guy" before. But I do think she meant those things when she wrote them - she just changed as the baggage of divorce and pressure of a new relationship got too much for her. I'm sure you're ex meant what she said too. Bottom line is that people change and it hurts. Sorry you're going through this. Eisenhower
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