slamina Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 Hello peeps, Like many others, this is my first post on this forum. I have been here looking for 2 weeks since my break up and will PROMISE to stick around and help others through it if this forum helps me through the hardest time of my life right now. Essentialy, my girlfriend broke up with me about a month ago after a substantial period of time. It killed me, and it spun me into a world of false hope and denial. However, having had time to think and talk to friends about it, I finally might be able to help myself a little. Heres how it goes: like usual the relationship started and it was incredible, magical, whatever. I LOVED HER SO MUCH. SO MUCH. However, towards the last few months, she became increasingly cold and didnt show the affection as much as she did before. I knew the end was coming, and I did everything I could to stop it. I really did try everything. But I failed. Her reason was 'were both young (uni age) and I just feel 'overwhelmed' and a bit scared about how commited this relationship is. That was it. That was her reason. Now, heres what I've got, having thought about it and talked to many people. My ex is having a hard time at home. Her dad is moving out etc etc...and I really aprreciate that and offered myself to help her in anyway she wanted because of this. Like me and her, her parents were each others first love. So this has lead to the conclusion that she's scared the same will happen, that she'll get hurt in the long term if she doesnt end it first. In other words, shes assumed and acted on the basis of her paretns situation. She has even hinted that this was the case. I didnt deserve the break up. I didn't lie, I didnt cheat, I didnt lose affection or love, ALL I DID WAS TRY TO GIVE THE MOON AND STARS TO HER. My friends say that she's being selfish and took only her own peace of mind into consideration when she broke up. She didnt consider how much it would hurt me. Now, until now I've put off thinking about this. However, if I do decide that shes selfish in my own mind, then it would REALLY help me get over this break up and let go, as it would make me angry and believe that there are other girls out there who aren't scared of commitment and wont let other things unrelated to the realtionship sffect our bond together. Please could you guys shed some light? Hope this made sense as I lie here on my birthday, knowing that if we hadnt broke up, we'd be going to paris weekend that I booked as a suprise...but then had to cancel. thanks again
Ariadne Posted October 25, 2009 Posted October 25, 2009 the relationship started and it was incredible, magical, whatever. I LOVED HER SO MUCH. SO MUCH. However, towards the last few months, she became increasingly cold Please could you guys shed some light? I lie here on my birthday, knowing that if we hadnt broke up, we'd be going to paris weekend that I booked as a suprise...but then had to cancel. thanks again Happy Birthday! I hope you had a good time in your birthday despite all this, and that she got to say HB to you. Too bad this relationship didn't work out. It seems like you loved her more, or were into it more than she was, and that usually spells trouble in the long run, especially if it's the guy that is gaga. In my experience those cases seldom work out. The times that I've been in those situations, I've felt pretty overwhelmed and unable to respond in the way that was expected of me. It was a lot of pressure. But at least you got to live that experience you said was magical, some people don't even get that. Hope you are feeling better today. Hugs.
Recommended Posts