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I got stood up


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Posted
It's enough of a sample size to see patterns what guys today are like.

 

Damn right. and my knowing of 5 gold-digging women on Craigslist is enough of a sample size to know what most women are like: gold diggers.:laugh:

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Posted
Apologies are great, but actions are better. He hasn't really been given a chance to see that, if you guys haven't ever really gone out. Again, I am not saying he shouldn't have ever called but if sort of can understand being more relaxed with someone that put me off a few times

 

The thing is we don't really see each other all that much, and it's been almost 2 months before we talked again. I don't exactly see how I was able to "prove" my actions. That said, he was the one who asked me out, I didn't make any reference of meeting up, he was the one who brought it up. So why bother even asking me and then not following through? That's a reason why I'm picky about hanging out with people who waste my time. I cleared my weekend schedule for him but seeing that he likes to be passive aggressive then I'm better off making new friends.

 

Like i've said, I removed him from my friends list and basically don't want to talk with him anymore.

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Posted
Damn right. and my knowing of 5 gold-digging women on Craigslist is enough of a sample size to know what most women are like: gold diggers.:laugh:

 

 

JayTb, I think it's a proven fact that both genders like to play games. The important thing is instead of getting bitter over being " played", you pick and choose your options wisely. That said, Craigslist is not a really good example to bring up, since it's already a gold digger's haven.

Posted

Maybe something came up. I've learned not to make assumptions. They just piss you and the other party off.

Posted
JayTb, I think it's a proven fact that both genders like to play games. The important thing is instead of getting bitter over being " played", you pick and choose your options wisely. That said, Craigslist is not a really good example to bring up, since it's already a gold digger's haven.

 

eh. I'm more or less trying to expose the logical fallacy of "it's been my experience ____, therefore it must be true". Obviously Craigslist is a bad example. That's precisely the point. A sample of a few doesn't represent all.

Posted

I agree about the generational laziness but it is not restricted to just men. Women can be just as bad.

 

 

 

It's enough of a sample size to see patterns what guys today are like. So many men are just completely flakey and lazy. They rather stay home and beat off then interact with women and treat them with respect. Now I know you don't like hearing it but it doesn't make it any less true. I have heard so many stories of guys just being completely wishy-washy. Even men that have been in "relationships" with women for ongoing months or years. Most guys today don't want to have personal accountabilty and responsiblity. They want to be extended frat boys. You see that mentality alot here on LS too. Again, you might not like what I have to say, you might not fit into the type of man I am talking about but there are ALOT of men out there like that.

 

 

xpaperx, it's possibly a passive-agressive move. He might be thinking that since you cancelled on him a few times that it's okay to treat you more causually now. Honestly, if someone kept me at arms length and then cancelled on me more then once, I wouldn't think they were serious about me. That doesn't mean I would stand them up but I wouldn't be making extra effort at this point. Maybe you have confused the message you are giving him. Not saying he shouldn't have called you though.

Posted
eh. I'm more or less trying to expose the logical fallacy of "it's been my experience ____, therefore it must be true". Obviously Craigslist is a bad example. That's precisely the point. A sample of a few doesn't represent all.

 

I'm surprised you bothered Jaytb :laugh:

Posted
I'm surprised you bothered Jaytb :laugh:

 

me too. sometimes apathy gives rise to non-apathy. Think of it as the evolution of states of being. One day you're apathetic and disillusioned, the next you're completely caring and wholesome. Survival of the fittest state of being. ;)

Posted
me too. sometimes apathy gives rise to non-apathy. Think of it as the evolution of states of being. One day you're apathetic and disillusioned, the next you're completely caring and wholesome. Survival of the fittest state of being. ;)

 

Brilliant!! :laugh::laugh:

Posted

Paper, I'm not sure anyone can say they were "stood up" when they didn't have "plans" to begin with... unless there are details you're leaving out?

 

But in any event, I'm glad to see you building some boundaries!! :) If someone doesn't treat you the way you think you deserve to be treated - next them. :)

Posted

The thing is we don't really see each other all that much, and it's been almost 2 months before we talked again. I don't exactly see how I was able to "prove" my actions.

 

I'm just saying that actions speak louder then words. If someone had a consistant pattern of canceling on me, they wouldn't be my top priorty. I am not saying that makes him right. Because I don't think it does but if you repeatidly canceled on teh guy, that kind of stuff gets old even if it's for what you think are responble reasons.

 

 

That said, he was the one who asked me out, I didn't make any reference of meeting up, he was the one who brought it up. So why bother even asking me and then not following through?

 

That is a question that millions of women around the world have asked themselves and the answer to those questions would also be a million and change. But it doesn't matter what the reason is because the end result is that you were unhappy with how he treated you. That's all you need to know to move on. Which it sounds like you have and that's good.

 

 

 

Like i've said, I removed him from my friends list and basically don't want to talk with him anymor

 

Well, keep us updated and let us know if he tries to reach out to you.

 

 

I agree about the generational laziness but it is not restricted to just men. Women can be just as bad.

 

You're right northstar. But I guess I am baised since I date men and listen to my girlfriends. But I don't doubt for a minute that women can be just as bad. I just know from my own experiences that guys in my generation just seem lazy alot of the time.

Posted
He probably just forgot.

 

+1

 

Plus, she should've called him. I mean it's not like they committed to a date. I don't think I can remember to call someone a week from now.

Posted

If he forgot then he deserves to get de-friended. It's just that simple. And no. she should not have called him. His lose.

  • Author
Posted
Paper, I'm not sure anyone can say they were "stood up" when they didn't have "plans" to begin with... unless there are details you're leaving out?

 

But in any event, I'm glad to see you building some boundaries!! :) If someone doesn't treat you the way you think you deserve to be treated - next them. :)

 

SG I didn't leave out anything. I had given him my new number a week before, and from the way he responded, he said he was going to call me in the next two days to make plans for the weekend. Because he was a friend and I trusted him, I gave him a full week to make plans. I even kept my phone on in case he called.

 

But yeah, things turned out the way they did. So whatever.

 

I'm glad that we don't have any animosity with each other though. It's nice to have friends on LS.

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Posted
+1

 

Plus, she should've called him. I mean it's not like they committed to a date. I don't think I can remember to call someone a week from now.

 

I don't see why I should have called him. I didn't know his schedule very well and he was the one who said he was going to call, not the other way around. See that's why I don't like making plans with people who make promises that they're not really going to keep.

 

Like I've said I'm over. I've made plans with a girlfriend to go out next weekend so I'm happy.

Posted

Not much of a friend is he?

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Posted
Not much of a friend is he?

 

 

I don't really have to answer that do I? lol

Posted
I don't really have to answer that do I? lol

 

That was more of a statement than a question :)

Posted
II just think guys in the younger generations are just not quality anymore and that it's three times as hard to find a good one.

 

Well you might have to date older men... damn they're no good either.. oh well just can't win.

 

;)

Posted
I'm glad that we don't have any animosity with each other though. It's nice to have friends on LS.

 

Of course! :)

 

You've come a long way in the past couple months - well done! :bunny:

Posted
If he forgot then he deserves to get de-friended. It's just that simple. And no. she should not have called him. His lose.

 

Huh?

 

This is not a zero-sum game where if he loses then she wins. If she likes him then why shouldn't she call him?

Posted
Well you might have to date older men... damn they're no good either.. oh well just can't win.

 

;)

There is no reason for me to settle for an older man. :)

Posted
I know women aren't perfect but inbetween hearing my friends stories, my own and talking on this thread, I just think guys in the younger generations are just not quality anymore and that it's three times as hard to find a good one.

LMAO :laugh:

Posted
I know women aren't perfect but inbetween hearing my friends stories, my own and talking on this thread, I just think guys in the younger generations are just not quality anymore and that it's three times as hard to find a good one.

 

Its not just guys, the new way of the world is to be as selfish as possible, and people are constantly encouraged to do things for themselves without any thought of others. Nobody wants to give without knowing for sure what they'll get for it, and everyone hedges bets.

 

My guess is he felt rejected before, and either used this as a way to get you back, or something else came along he thought was a better use of his time. Honestly, these quasi-platonic situations are very stick, and usually lead to stuff like this happening.

Posted

If she had called him, I doubt he would of answered the phone.

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