gmbattag Posted October 20, 2009 Posted October 20, 2009 i met this guy at a wedding about 2 months ago. We completely hit it off and basically stayed up the whole night talking (my family and friends stayed at the same hotel that night) The next day i was going back to florida, while he stayed in ny. We texted everyday and then a week later i asked him why he was talking to me and he said he likes me and wants to date me but hes not built for long distance relationships. We still continued to talk, and then he stopped for a week, and then called me for the first time. Then stopped for a week and then wrote me online, then stopped for a week and then called me and we wound up talking for 4 hours and he texted me that whole week. He keeps asking me if im going to come visit him in december, and has offered to pay for my flight. I asked him what if he has a gf and he said he wont. i just dont understand what is going on here. I have never felt this way about anyone so fast before. Granted I am 22, but I dont think this feeling comes around very often. I dont know if i should continue talking to him or go visit him in december and see how we r together and see how he feels about us, or if i should just stop talking to him. He talks to me like a girlfriend and a best friend, tells me he misses me, wants to bring me on dates, which doesnt make sense. I ultimately dont want to get hurt, so im trying to figure out what is best and if hes being honest with me. Any ideas?
Rollercoasterr Posted October 20, 2009 Posted October 20, 2009 Has he given you any kind of reason for his week pauses in communication? Until you get that little bit sorted out I wouldn't jump into a relationship with him. You never know when he's going to stop calling for a week, or 2, or 3, or forever. See what I mean? LD relationships need consistency, faith, and a lot of trust. Communication is the most important part for us. Falling off the face of the earth for a week is definitely bad communication. Get all of your issues sorted out before you go visit him. Know what to expect from him and make sure he knows what to expect from you. Good luck
Author gmbattag Posted October 20, 2009 Author Posted October 20, 2009 When he called me last week i said something jokingly about him writing me once a week and he was like i wanted to keep in touch with you. I guess the only reason I can think of is that he doesnt want to get attached to me or close to me when he knows that he doesnt want to be in an LDR with me. I am guessing though, that he enjoyed our phone conversation, considering he has been talking to me everyday since then, but at the same time i have to take it with a grain of salt, bc I do not know if he is going to stop again. I know that i will see him again next august for sure bc he is friends with my cousins, but before then i dont know. He made plans to come visit me in march with his friends for spring break. At the same time, i dont want to get more feelings for him then i already do, bc i dont want to get hurt, and i also do not want to smother him by wanting to talk to him every day. You are completely right with getting to know what his intentions are before i go visit, if i go visit. I wanna know why he wants me to visit him so much that hes mentioned it a lot and mentioned visiting me a lot but doesnt intend to have a relationship with me. I can understand though that we never went on a date or anything, and it has only been about 2 months, but what feels like a year!
SuburbanOblivion Posted October 23, 2009 Posted October 23, 2009 He flat-out says he wants to spend time with you but not have a relationship with you? Two words- Booty Call. Move on.
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