memsie Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 i had been with my boyfriend "john" for about two years. we lived together, and ended up breaking up. during our time apart, i started dating a new guy and "john's" response to this was to have threesomes with a few high school girls. the new guy ended up cheating on me while i was on vacation. "john" and i ended up back together, on the premise that i needed to know what happened while we were apart because i knew it would become an issue at some point. he told me they just hooked up twice, drunk, and that i did not know the girls. sure enough, as highschoolers will do, they got bored and started emailing ME. harrassing ME. sending me details, telling me it was seven times not twice, sober fun, and i did infact know one of the girls.they live in the same area and are friends with his little sister. after i confronted him, he admitted that they were telling the truth, but that there were no more lies. i cant tell you how many times hes said "but thats the truth- no more lies" and been wrong. i have never been so humiliated in my life, hearing the truth that i begged my guy for, from the girls he fooled around with. i also feel taken advantage of- had i known the truth i may not have gotten back together with him but he lied to me. also a part of me feels insignificant- i know a threesome with 'barely legal' girls is close to every guys dream, how do i compete with that? i know that with his he was just trying to protect my emotions and keep me from being hurt, but as i knew i would, i ended up torn apart because of his lies and the humiliation. i feel now that i just cannot trust him, nevermind how his actions have destoryed my self esteem. the problem is i cannot seem to get him off my mind. i think about him all the time, and im not sure if its because of simply my physical attraction to him, or because we;ve just been through so much together. i worry because i have gone through SO much pain over the years with him, and sure there have been happy times as well, but i just dont know how many times i can forgive his dishonesty, and forgive the hurt hes caused me. there have been many other times hes hurt me, this is just the worst/most recent. i dont know if i should forgive and forget, though i dont know if i can trust him, or if i should try to move on- and how. any advice?
NopeNah Posted October 16, 2009 Posted October 16, 2009 Who broke up with the other in the first place?
Author memsie Posted October 16, 2009 Author Posted October 16, 2009 i broke up with him, he was getting controlling... demanding to know where i was at all times, who i was with, he was going through my phine and texts etc. i dont do well with that.
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