jigga23 Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Im in a LTR right now. Quick bg. I dated this chick on and off for 3 years. We dated 2 years and lived together 1 of those years. 2.5 years later we talked again and moved in again with one another. Now she wants to not live together nor be together anymore and our lease is up in 2 months. I want female opinions on what you think of me and Im going to be honest. I have an undergrad and finishing up my grad degree (coursework is done except for the thesis so working on it on and off). Ive worked for major companies but either quit or got fired. I dont have the 9 to 5 mentality. I have a business where I am making about 4 k a month right now and I really dont work that hard and she knows this. I play a lot of poker. I take her on trips vegas, cali etc. and rent nice cars and stay in nice hotels, gamble and show her a good time and pay for everything. I am good looking and in great shape. I am confident and c0cky. I drive an 2008 mercedes. I got materialistic stuff (clothes, watches etc.) I got a lot of friends and know people everywhere I go. I take care of her basically. I call her out when she doest stupid **** that any normal human being would find wrong. A lot of people think Im cool as ****. My goal right now is not to sit at a desk it is to become a poker pro as I am skilled enough to do so. Right now with everything I have about 5 k coming in a month so I ahve back up for poker. My goal is to be rich, not when Im 50 but in my 30's. I make more moeny than a lot of people I know. RIght now Im 27. Thats the honest truth. Would you wanna be in a LTR with me?
dreamergrl Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Nope. I don't care how much you make - I don't like c0cky.
Author jigga23 Posted October 14, 2009 Author Posted October 14, 2009 Im not c0cky with a significant other just to others. Lol. R U a librarian?
TaraMaiden Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 The things you do, the things you have, the things you want, do not make you who you are. Everything you have spoken about is external décor. if you ended up a quadriplegic, none of it would ever matter again. What is more important is what is between your ears. Not what you have to "show and tell". I care little for the extravagance of a person. I care more about how kind they are, how considerate, how affectionate and how compassionate they are. So far....? Completely disinterested.
Bejita463 Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 R U a librarian? What kind of question is that? Ridiculous. Don't ask questions you can't handle the answers to broseidon.
torranceshipman Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 If you really want to be that cocky and 'cool' and base your entire worth on materialistic things then hey, thats your choice, and a certain type of girl will no doubt go for you (the insecure type needing validation or golddiggers), but if that is your calling card, you'd need to be earning way more than $4k a month, and have a much more wide ranging, impressive life set up around what you earn (VIP parties, trips to Europe, eating at the best restaurants, famous/powerful friends, and so on) and be doing your gambling at lovely venues where you've been invited to a big table by big players. If this is gambling online then forget it. Also you'd need to be very good looking and a very snappy dresser. Sounds like you like to talk down to the girl a bit, and again, that works only on the type of girl who is insecure and needs validation, or who will put up with it because (if) you're rich because she just wants your money. Also....your friends are very important. You'd need influential, impressive friends - if the people who find you cool are late 20's bar fly's then, again, sorry, that won't wash. The classy, confident girls (the type who are great for a fulfilling LTR) won't go for you, because they think you are a cocky ass who doesn't have much to back up the cockiness. Speaking for myself....my boyfriend is very handsome, very intelligent, very successful, and I've seen a girl blatantly hit on him in FRONT of me already - he's a good catch - but I have no worries because he is a really nice guy and treats me like gold (a real gent) and I respect him and love him for that...if he was as cocky as you when I met him, I wouldn't have wanted a LTR with him.
prettybaby Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Would you wanna be in a LTR with me? No. Because your lifestyle and priorities don't match mine at all. So you basically just have to find a woman who's into that kind of life. I have personally found my match, and I'm not about to let him go. Here are the reasons why I see strong long term potential with my guy: - he's kind, patient, sweet, honest, loving - he loves children - he's hard working - he's not rich, but he makes a steady income. He's a home owner, which also shows me that he'd rather focus on solid, long term things. - he values little things in life, and is very romantic - all in all, I feel like this man would be the best dad if we ever have kids together; he'd be a really good role model for them. And he wouldn't be any source of stress or tension in my life. So those are things that matter to me when I look at long term perspective. Your lifestyle would worry me. I would rather invest the money into solid things like real estate, instead of putting them into cars that decrease value each year, bling bling we don't need, etc. I would probably always be worried that you'd end up losing everything with poker, and that we'd be left with nothing but debts. I own a business and make more money than you. And I would never waste my money on silly things like that. Because it's simply not smart if you're looking at building up long term assets and income. So, no, I wouldn't even consider getting into a LTR with you. But then again, you could probably find a woman who would be perfectly okay with that. It's all about finding your match.
EcstasyX6 Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 You seemed to stress how much money you make. My ex made a lot of money, had degrees up the wazoo, bought me expensive things, took me to 5 star restaurants and hotels, but he missed what was at the heart of our relationship. He was so focused on work, and having and buying things, that he missed out on life, so our relationship fell apart. He was sweet and kind, but all he wanted to do was spend time on the computer and watch TV. The real life stuff, time with the kids, typical chores, man around the house stuff, passion, interests outside of the home, 'manly' activities in and out of the house, a connection with me, and friends, he had no time for. He gets that now. When I complained, and we discussed where we went wrong over the years, his reply was, "I figured you loved me, so I'd eventually get to that stuff later." My current bf has a steady job, a home,passionate, he's sweet, works 9-5, and is very manly without being cocky,(although he's very confident-I don't count this as cocky). Most importantly he gets living life, and being involved in it, and of course he gets me. You may be missing what your gf is really about, and too focused on what you think she wants. You have to seriously ask yourself if your plugged in to her. Sit her down and have a talk with her if you really don't want her to leave and see what the real problem is, and hopefully she can be completely honest with you.
JustLooking123 Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 No, I would not want a LDR or any sort of relationship with you. Your priorities are too different than mine. I don't really care about most of the things you mentioned. Sounds like you have questionable integrity and a shaky work ethic at best. Good luck, though; there's someone for everyone out there.
kiss_andmakeup Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Nope. You sound like a douche. I don't know if that's how you come off in real life, but that's how you've just presented yourself here. And anyone who is making $4k a month (well under $48,000 a year after taxes) and is driving a mercedes and doing all the "extravagant" things you do, has a serious problem with living within their means.
TaraMaiden Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Oh, by the way... My partner really IS a poker-pro. He also works part-time in a betting shop. He's virtually qualified in a law Degree, and plans on gaining his Master's and qualifying as a Lecturer. So he has a decent job, and wouldn't be a mug for anything. It's the rare breed that stays at the top. And they don't, for long. Poker is a roller-coaster ride, and you're only as good as your next hand.
stace79 Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 I would not want to be in a LTR with you, because I was in one with a guy sort of like you. He wasn't in to gambling, but he was very business-savvy and made well over $150K by the time he was your age, and had quite a bit of savings/stocks/investments. He did what you did -- took me everywhere, paid for lots of stuff, had lots of friends, etc. But most of his friends liked him because he had $$ and was generous and he seemed to expect people to go out of their way for him all the time because he would spend money on them. It wasn't about an actual friendship or relationship; it was all about what we took from him and what he could get back in return. I always felt like a call girl when I was dating him, not like his girlfriend. I also just plain despise gambling and find online poker a huge turnoff. I would probably also be concerned about your desire to "not work very hard" because if you have a family, you will have to be more responsible and definitely work hard. No woman wanting a serious husband and family would be interested in your happy-go-lucky lifestyle. Additionally, you seem to be more concerned with things than with substance. It is perfectly honorable to want to be financially secure and enjoy nice things in life, but if that is all you have then you don't have that much. There are some women who would be perfectly happy with just having all the "things" you provide, but many women need a more intimate connection with their man.
Author jigga23 Posted October 14, 2009 Author Posted October 14, 2009 Lol I got the responses I thought I would. Anyways seriously I am very attentative to her. Surprise her with food after her long day at work. She asks for something I do it. I am like a butler to her. Im not some douche that is selfish with her. Shes not happy Im always there too listen. My friends arent only bar flys. About %98 of my friends all have degrees. My best friends have MBA's. I dont roll with uneducated scum. I dont hand out money to friends either so i know a lot of people like me because of me. My actual income per month is about $6k after taxes. I can afford a good lifestyle. Yea Im obsessed with making money but I look to do it in the fastest legal with the least effort needed. Im not some dude who will sit at a desk for 14 hours a day waiting for that promotion. I am always home when she is for the most part. I am always there for her. Basically Im trying to show that I am an out of the box person. I am not that boring person that drives a 98 honda, and my personal goal in life is to sit at a desk, collect that regular check and maybe after 5 years ill be pulling in what Im making now. Im educated, my parents got money, ive traveled around the world, well cultured, know how to have fun. So some of you girls are contempt with some joe schmo who works at that 9 to 5 or 9 to 9 basically making peanuts for money and maybe by the time hes 50 hell be making 150k. Hes coming home stressed everyday from work and has no life except of sat and sun. Good luck with that. Well you know what, any of you girls would live my life if you could, meaning my business, income with not that hard of work and lifestyle. Yea my work ethic sucks if its something I dont like. But ive worked out 6 days a week for years doing repetitive things because I have a goal. Im good at a lot of things I do. My gpa in undergrad and grad were well above 3.0. There is work ethic it just has to be the right thing. You say the man has to be a hard worker etc. Theres people that do nothing and colllect decents amount of money and can still provide. She never supports me I support her. She even said I want to be with someone so I dont have to work. Im sure most of you that posted say ditto. So If your man won 20 mill you would still work? LOL.
dreamergrl Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Im not c0cky with a significant other just to others. Lol. R U a librarian? Hardly. But I know that money doesn't make relationship. I don't go setting out for guys who can buy me this or that. I love to go out and do fun things. My favorite vacation was to Vegas. And I'm only a year older then you at most. But I'd take a guy who's got self worth over net worth any day
stace79 Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Lol I got the responses I thought I would. Anyways seriously I am very attentative to her. Surprise her with food after her long day at work. She asks for something I do it. I am like a butler to her. Im not some douche that is selfish with her. Shes not happy Im always there too listen. My friends arent only bar flys. About %98 of my friends all have degrees. My best friends have MBA's. I dont roll with uneducated scum. I dont hand out money to friends either so i know a lot of people like me because of me. My actual income per month is about $6k after taxes. I can afford a good lifestyle. Yea Im obsessed with making money but I look to do it in the fastest legal with the least effort needed. Im not some dude who will sit at a desk for 14 hours a day waiting for that promotion. I am always home when she is for the most part. I am always there for her. Basically Im trying to show that I am an out of the box person. I am not that boring person that drives a 98 honda, and my personal goal in life is to sit at a desk, collect that regular check and maybe after 5 years ill be pulling in what Im making now. Im educated, my parents got money, ive traveled around the world, well cultured, know how to have fun. So some of you girls are contempt with some joe schmo who works at that 9 to 5 or 9 to 9 basically making peanuts for money and maybe by the time hes 50 hell be making 150k. Hes coming home stressed everyday from work and has no life except of sat and sun. Good luck with that. Well you know what, any of you girls would live my life if you could, meaning my business, income with not that hard of work and lifestyle. Yea my work ethic sucks if its something I dont like. But ive worked out 6 days a week for years doing repetitive things because I have a goal. Im good at a lot of things I do. My gpa in undergrad and grad were well above 3.0. There is work ethic it just has to be the right thing. You say the man has to be a hard worker etc. Theres people that do nothing and colllect decents amount of money and can still provide. She never supports me I support her. She even said I want to be with someone so I dont have to work. Im sure most of you that posted say ditto. So If your man won 20 mill you would still work? LOL. Man, you really just project an attitude. First off, you asked for people's opinions; now that you got them, you tell us why we're wrong? Why did you ask to begin with? Second, no one said they don't want a guy who earns a really great living. I can honestly say that while it'd be nice to not HAVE to work some day, especially if I had kids, I would likely still work at least part time, or do a job that I really loved but wouldn't normally be able to b/c of money issues. Third, you seem to think money is the most important thing. It helps, but it's not the most important thing. If you die tomorrow, what good does all your money and stuff do for you? Lastly, maybe your gf just doesn't want a guy who's going to sit around playing poker in casinos all the time. That just isn't a guy I would be interested in, no matter how much money he brings in. I'm an educated (master's degree), successful, career focused woman, and I just doubt that anyone addicted to gambling would be a good fit for me. I think there is nothing wrong with doing a different type of career -- for instance, I have a friend who started a landscape business b/c he didn't want a desk job either. He makes great money, sets his own hours and enjoys working outside. But he's definitely got an awesome work ethic, and I know if crap needed to get done, he'd get it done. Maybe I am pulling a "don't wanna get my hands dirty" vibe from you? Is that it?
TaraMaiden Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Lol I got the responses I thought I would. Anyways seriously I am very attentative to her. Surprise her with food after her long day at work. She asks for something I do it. I am like a butler to her. Im not some douche that is selfish with her. Shes not happy Im always there too listen. My friends arent only bar flys. About %98 of my friends all have degrees. My best friends have MBA's. I dont roll with uneducated scum. I dont hand out money to friends either so i know a lot of people like me because of me. My actual income per month is about $6k after taxes. I can afford a good lifestyle. Yea Im obsessed with making money but I look to do it in the fastest legal with the least effort needed. Im not some dude who will sit at a desk for 14 hours a day waiting for that promotion. I am always home when she is for the most part. I am always there for her. Basically Im trying to show that I am an out of the box person. I am not that boring person that drives a 98 honda, and my personal goal in life is to sit at a desk, collect that regular check and maybe after 5 years ill be pulling in what Im making now. Im educated, my parents got money, ive traveled around the world, well cultured, know how to have fun. So some of you girls are contempt with some joe schmo who works at that 9 to 5 or 9 to 9 basically making peanuts for money and maybe by the time hes 50 hell be making 150k. Hes coming home stressed everyday from work and has no life except of sat and sun. Good luck with that. Well you know what, any of you girls would live my life if you could, meaning my business, income with not that hard of work and lifestyle. Yea my work ethic sucks if its something I dont like. But ive worked out 6 days a week for years doing repetitive things because I have a goal. Im good at a lot of things I do. My gpa in undergrad and grad were well above 3.0. There is work ethic it just has to be the right thing. You say the man has to be a hard worker etc. Theres people that do nothing and colllect decents amount of money and can still provide. She never supports me I support her. She even said I want to be with someone so I dont have to work. Im sure most of you that posted say ditto. So If your man won 20 mill you would still work? LOL. Bang your gums and argue all you want. You asked, we told you. "methinks the lad doth protest to much." For all your bravado, attention and exciting lifestyle, this is still the bottom line, isn't it? Now she wants to not live together nor be together anymore and our lease is up in 2 months. So you are obviously under the impression that you are just what a lady needs - but she's made it clear you have got it wrong.... Back to the drawing board, my friend. You didn't cut it for us - and you're obviously not cutting it for her.
Author jigga23 Posted October 14, 2009 Author Posted October 14, 2009 Lol you go to vegas and bet $5 a hand on blackjack and quit when you get up $50? Ive gone to vegas and won thousands in a short time. Its not about the materialistic things its just saying I can buy things if I want. I haven't bought her something nice for a long time. I basically give her money if she needs it. I pay for the majority of bills its actually lop-sided on me. Lol self worth? Well you know what I got more knowledge about any topic you can think of. Ive experienced things that not to many in the US can say. I lived overseas. I personally know the former deputy prime minister of a country if you want I can call him now. Ive hung with the granddaughter of royalty from another country multiple times. My cousins married to a particular former US presidents FIRST cousin and Ive hung with him. Ive ran around US embassys and had personal conversations with a US ambassador. I was bestfriends with the daugther of a 4 star general. To all the repliers out there, who many of your BF's have experiences like me? The repliers on here just reiteriate who ridiculous women are. A man works at a job making like 35-40k for a while and thats not good enough. Then he makes about 60-70k not working and thats still not good enough becuase hes not a desk but can provide better.
CarrieT Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 I think the basic premise is that the OP is telling us how fabulous he is but he obviously has self-doubt by having to ask what we think of him. And when we point out some of the basic flaws that we -- as women -- see him projecting, it puts him more on the defensive and he attempt to project that much more what an amazing guy he is. And we are just not buying it. Granted, there IS someone for everybody and a great relationship is not based on what our employment, income, or car is. Or who he "hangs with." Personally, I was put off by the OP's inability to construct a cohesive sentence with proper grammar or punctuation. Maybe the OP should consider a degree or at least a little more schooling...
Author jigga23 Posted October 14, 2009 Author Posted October 14, 2009 Lol she is hating on my lifestyle. She wants to be where I am. Shes said multiple times she doesnt want to have to work. Im in that position and any of you who say they wouldnt yea right.
dreamergrl Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Lol I got the responses I thought I would. Anyways seriously I am very attentative to her. Surprise her with food after her long day at work. She asks for something I do it. I am like a butler to her. Im not some douche that is selfish with her. Shes not happy Im always there too listen. My friends arent only bar flys. About %98 of my friends all have degrees. My best friends have MBA's. I dont roll with uneducated scum. I dont hand out money to friends either so i know a lot of people like me because of me. My actual income per month is about $6k after taxes. I can afford a good lifestyle. Yea Im obsessed with making money but I look to do it in the fastest legal with the least effort needed. Im not some dude who will sit at a desk for 14 hours a day waiting for that promotion. I am always home when she is for the most part. I am always there for her. Yet she left you. Even though you are so 'wondeful' And you're supposed income keeps rising as you post Basically Im trying to show that I am an out of the box person. I am not that boring person that drives a 98 honda, and my personal goal in life is to sit at a desk, collect that regular check and maybe after 5 years ill be pulling in what Im making now. Im educated, my parents got money, ive traveled around the world, well cultured, know how to have fun. Basically you're bragging about yourself, which screams self centered - not an attractive trait. Also, educated people know that you write stuff like I'm not im or I'll instead of ill ... he'll not hell So some of you girls are contempt with some joe schmo who works at that 9 to 5 or 9 to 9 basically making peanuts for money and maybe by the time hes 50 hell be making 150k. Hes coming home stressed everyday from work and has no life except of sat and sun. Good luck with that. Joe Schmo has a better personality and is easier to be around. Joe Schmo doesn't need to buy my happiness. Joe Schmo doesn't need an extra seat in his car for his ego. Joe Schmo is a good person with or without money. Joe Schmo is much better then some schmuck who thinks money makes life perfect. Well you know what, any of you girls would live my life if you could, meaning my business, income with not that hard of work and lifestyle. Yea my work ethic sucks if its something I dont like. But ive worked out 6 days a week for years doing repetitive things because I have a goal. Im good at a lot of things I do. My gpa in undergrad and grad were well above 3.0. There is work ethic it just has to be the right thing. You say the man has to be a hard worker etc. Theres people that do nothing and colllect decents amount of money and can still provide. She never supports me I support her. She even said I want to be with someone so I dont have to work. Im sure most of you that posted say ditto. So If your man won 20 mill you would still work? LOL. So she told you she wants to be with someone that can provide for her so she doesn't have to work, and she still left you. What does that say about you?
stace79 Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Lol you go to vegas and bet $5 a hand on blackjack and quit when you get up $50? Ive gone to vegas and won thousands in a short time. Its not about the materialistic things its just saying I can buy things if I want. I haven't bought her something nice for a long time. I basically give her money if she needs it. I pay for the majority of bills its actually lop-sided on me. Lol self worth? Well you know what I got more knowledge about any topic you can think of. Ive experienced things that not to many in the US can say. I lived overseas. I personally know the former deputy prime minister of a country if you want I can call him now. Ive hung with the granddaughter of royalty from another country multiple times. My cousins married to a particular former US presidents FIRST cousin and Ive hung with him. Ive ran around US embassys and had personal conversations with a US ambassador. I was bestfriends with the daugther of a 4 star general. To all the repliers out there, who many of your BF's have experiences like me? The repliers on here just reiteriate who ridiculous women are. A man works at a job making like 35-40k for a while and thats not good enough. Then he makes about 60-70k not working and thats still not good enough becuase hes not a desk but can provide better. Oh, Lordy, you remind me of the spoiled little trust fund babies I went to graduate school with at a local private college. NOW, it sounds like the problem is that you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth and think you're God's gift. That is definitely a turn off. No one cares who you know if you're a jackass! Maybe your gf is annoyed b/c your idea of making a living is playing poker, while living off your parents' good fortune?
TaraMaiden Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Lol she is hating on my lifestyle. She wants to be where I am. Shes said multiple times she doesnt want to have to work. Im in that position and any of you who say they wouldnt yea right. You might think you're educated, but in fact, you are very sadly, extremely ignorant. "Youth is wasted on the young"....(G.B. Shaw). Just to educate you. You know the price of everything - but the value of nothing. Well, bunch up on money, honey, all you want. It doesn't keep you company in your old age, by the fireside.
dreamergrl Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 Lol you go to vegas and bet $5 a hand on blackjack and quit when you get up $50? Ive gone to vegas and won thousands in a short time. Its not about the materialistic things its just saying I can buy things if I want. I haven't bought her something nice for a long time. I basically give her money if she needs it. I pay for the majority of bills its actually lop-sided on me. Lol self worth? Well you know what I got more knowledge about any topic you can think of. Ive experienced things that not to many in the US can say. I lived overseas. I personally know the former deputy prime minister of a country if you want I can call him now. Ive hung with the granddaughter of royalty from another country multiple times. My cousins married to a particular former US presidents FIRST cousin and Ive hung with him. Ive ran around US embassys and had personal conversations with a US ambassador. I was bestfriends with the daugther of a 4 star general. To all the repliers out there, who many of your BF's have experiences like me? The repliers on here just reiteriate who ridiculous women are. A man works at a job making like 35-40k for a while and thats not good enough. Then he makes about 60-70k not working and thats still not good enough becuase hes not a desk but can provide better. I loved my Vegas vacation because of who I was with, not because I could bet thousands of dollars. In fact - I'm educated enough to know that unless you have a business that will in fact stay grounded through the ****ty economy, and will always provide for you, you don't need to be gambling that kind of money away. I'm educated enough to know that being a poker player and sitting on your ass these days wont get you that far. And you really don't sound that educated. Go look back and the bold and reread what you wrote and realize how much sense it did not make That's also not including the good ten commas you should have used so it made your post readable the first time through. I'm just saying...
Author jigga23 Posted October 14, 2009 Author Posted October 14, 2009 I got two degrees undergrad and grad. I dont care about typing properly on here. No Im not a trust fund kid but my parents do make a lot of money. Ive been spoiled my whole life. she has also been also. shes been spoiled by her parents and by dudes all her life. Whatever I want i get in life usually. You girls are saying she still wants to leave despite I provide for her. Well you dont konw her. She has a nasty coke habit, bi polar and is on anti's. Everyone tells me Im better than her. Now you understand.
dreamergrl Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 I got two degrees undergrad and grad. I dont care about typing properly on here. No Im not a trust fund kid but my parents do make a lot of money. Ive been spoiled my whole life. she has also been also. shes been spoiled by her parents and by dudes all her life. Whatever I want i get in life usually. You girls are saying she still wants to leave despite I provide for her. Well you dont konw her. She has a nasty coke habit, bi polar and is on anti's. Everyone tells me Im better than her. Now you understand. Funny how she all of a sudden has all these things wrong with her. Also, if that's how she is, why are asking us why she wouldn't want to be with you? Another bad trait is being spoiled.
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