JL911 Posted October 13, 2009 Posted October 13, 2009 Little background. We met through a mutial friend few months ago and have been talking mostly online. She's one of the most beautiful girls I've ever laid eyes on. Smart, very fast witted, and just really keeps me on my toes like no other girl I have come across in 26 years. I finally worked up the balls and asked her out last week. Ive been out with this girl 3 times in the past week and we talk a lot. The first date we spent hanging out watching a football game and basically the bar was closed around us. I walked her to her car gave her a hug and got a very unexpected kiss...SCORE! The next date we spent roaming around hanging out, eating dinner, having icecream and once again we kissed only it was a few more times.... Last week I invited her out on a Saturday. We had a quick dinner then came back to my place to watch a hockey game and we ended up laying down in my bed together having a very indepth conversation with one another. Lots of huggin, kissing, and soft talking... A few red flags were thrown my way and I am not sure how to react. I am 26 shes 24. She has never had a relationship go longer than 3 months, she claims she has dated a lot of jerks and guys who were kinda intimidated by her intellegence and being able to do guy things and couldnt accept things. She claims that she has got bored with a few of them as well... I am not intimidated...She doesnt scare me...Im rather drawn to her...I kind of like the fact that she is both beautiful and brilliant...But am kind of hesitant to persue her just due to the fact that she cant get past 3 months with anyone. I can understand there are a lot of jerk guys and others who can have their manhood bruised by a powerful woman, but I for one am not one of those guys. I dont know what I have to lose except 3 months...Im worried she might be a bit of a commitment phobe and I do not know how to deal with that...However, I feel that the fact she was very open and honest about this issue with her past relationships might mean she hopes to change that or may see me as different from the rest.... I really do enjoy her company...I admire her wit and her ability to kinda match my sarcasim...I think I do want to persue her, but am still not 100% sure...
callingyouuu Posted October 13, 2009 Posted October 13, 2009 I think you should go for it. Commitment-phobe? Likely, and I kind of feel like much of the independent/intelligent girl crowd do have varying levels of commitment. She seems like an amazing person, though, and I think it would be a great experience for both of you regardless of what happens. Don't go into it hoping to be "the one" that will push her past the 3-month barrier, but I don't see why it wouldn't be worth the leap!
lucy9216 Posted October 13, 2009 Posted October 13, 2009 I think you should pursue her, it seems like there is a connection there between the two of you and you both enjoy each other's company. Going into any relationship no one is ever 100% certain of the outcome, that is what dating is about. If it doesent work out you will have had a great time being around her, and if it does work out than she is the one for you but if you give up just because you feel she may be a commitment phobe then you will always regret what might have been.
Johnny M Posted October 13, 2009 Posted October 13, 2009 Just go for it and see where it leads. The worst thing that could happen is you sleeping with a good-looking girl for a couple of months....What's the problem? Or are you one of those "sensitive" types who writes poem about their exes and contemplate suicide when a girl dumps them?
singlegirl Posted October 13, 2009 Posted October 13, 2009 Jump in, she may not be the one but then again she may be....You will always regret it if you don't persue her.... red flags ? You do seem kinda sensitive...I met a 45 yr old woman who hadn't gotten past 2 months, now there's a red flag lol:laugh:
trueblue72ny Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 maybe you can be the first to make it 4 months with her. lol. i say go for it!
xpaperxcutx Posted October 14, 2009 Posted October 14, 2009 3 months is the normal trend nowadays. I remember most of my relationships barely last a month or two, but then I will admit, I am a committphobe. I fall fast and then I end it fast... lol Yet it's hard to say for now, but you should be glad for her honesty. Sometimes a person can say one thing and down the road do another thing altogether. Which goes to say, it is possible to change someone depending on the experiences they go through. You may quite possibly have a great relationship with her and she will love you (?) Even if you get the warning signs now, I think it's safe to say that you should pursue. When given chances to do something, be they romance or business or life, you wouldn't want to regret in the future.
Author JL911 Posted October 14, 2009 Author Posted October 14, 2009 I have our 4th date lined up now for saturday. I got us tickets to a college football game for a team she and I both just love to watch. I keep feeling as if I am smitten with her more than I have been in the past. Its like I wish I could see her a lot more than I do, but I dont want to like force things if you know what I mean...I feel like I am slightly holding back for whatever reason, but I am really developing strong feelings for this one...
Recommended Posts