vin_c_boy Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 I dumped my ex 37 years ago for someone else. I have now found her e-mail address online and I contacted her.We are now, both married and have children. However, we enjoy talking to each other on an Instant Messenger program. We are both faithful to our spouses, and we do not intend to interfere with each other's marriage. On the other hand, we had so many things in common, 37 years ago, that we enjoy these chatting sessions. I do not want these chats to stop. Any comments?
ecm Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 woudl you be comfortable telling your spouses about your freindship? If not, it's not nice. Sorry. Would you like it if the roles were reversed?
GorillaTheater Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 Shouldn't be a big deal. So long as you're entirely upfront with your wife and she has ready access to all the messages sent back and forth. But I doubt it's that simple. I suspect you have doubts whether your intentions are entirely honorable. Are they?
Author vin_c_boy Posted October 12, 2009 Author Posted October 12, 2009 My intentions are honourable. Her intentions are also honourable. We do not get "out-of-line" ever. We talk about our childhood days, our school days, our early days on our jobs, present day politics, economic affairs, world affairs. We had a certain chemistry, and although we went our separate ways, we still like each other, and we respect each other. I believe that this is strengthening both our marriages. Our spouses know that we are in contact, but they do not know how often, nor the content of our e-mails. Another thing, is that she lives in another country, which is about 3,000 miles away from me.
boldjack Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 Vin, I am in close contact with a woman from my past too. Neither of us intend to cheat on our spouses, and both spouses are aware of our contact. If you and the lady have been honest to your respective SO's then I see this as just two friends, exchanging pleasantries, and nothing more.
ecm Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 My intentions are honourable. Her intentions are also honourable. We do not get "out-of-line" ever. We talk about our childhood days, our school days, our early days on our jobs, present day politics, economic affairs, world affairs. We had a certain chemistry, and although we went our separate ways, we still like each other, and we respect each other. I believe that this is strengthening both our marriages. Our spouses know that we are in contact, but they do not know how often, nor the content of our e-mails. Another thing, is that she lives in another country, which is about 3,000 miles away from me. I think many sticky situations start out with honorable intentions. If you aren't thinking "questionable" things, do you wonder why you're asking about it on here? I think if your spouses know about it, that's great. The fact that they don't know the extent is suspect. Hope I don't seem harsh, but I'm just being honest. I wouldn't want someone doing that to me, so I wouldn't do it. To me, any sneakiness is not nice. (unless it's planning a surprise party or something)
seibert253 Posted October 13, 2009 Posted October 13, 2009 My intentions are honourable. Her intentions are also honourable. We do not get "out-of-line" ever. We talk about our childhood days, our school days, our early days on our jobs, present day politics, economic affairs, world affairs. We had a certain chemistry, and although we went our separate ways, we still like each other, and we respect each other. I believe that this is strengthening both our marriages. Our spouses know that we are in contact, but they do not know how often, nor the content of our e-mails. Another thing, is that she lives in another country, which is about 3,000 miles away from me. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Search around on this forum and read the number of A's that started with reconnecting with a lost love. One simple question, how does you W feel about these conversations? Do you share them with her? If the answers are your wife doesn't know, and you don't share them, guess what; you're already involved in inappropriate activity. Try this, share with your wife what you've told us. Her reaction will be all you need to know.
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