b3nx Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 So I just spend 5 days wih my girlfriend. Last night I decided to go home because I was really tired and I had to go to work tonight. I work late into the evening. I feel bad because she was crying when I said I had to leave because she said she has spent the past week with me and will miss me. I get to see her in 2 days and we had 3 days we are going to spend with each other.. I just knew if I stayed I would have been really tired today and would have been tired on my days off when we will see each other again. She knows I love her we have spoken around marriage and we plan to next year. I just needed to sleep for work, should I feel bad?
seoa Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 OK, a useful tip for boyfriends, when your gf is crying because of something that you've done... It's OK to say "I am sorry that you are feeling bad" - AND MEAN IT - without saying (or meaning) "I am sorry for what I did that made you feel bad"... It's OK for her to be sad at the thought of missing you... It's even kinda cute that she was, isn't it...? It doesn't mean that you have to do anything differently... It doesn't even mean that she WANTS you to do anything different... Girls are generally OK with feeling sad about stuff, just because we feel a bit sad... And our body chemistry means that when we feel sad, the tears mostly just kinda happen... Probably all you needed to do was hug her and say "Yeah, we have had a fabulous few days, haven't we. I will miss you too. You are wonderful."
littlewhiterose Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 She was crying? How long have you been together?
Double Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 No, you shouldn't feel bad. Does your gf have hobbies or friends besides you? If not, maybe she should get one/some.
EcstasyX6 Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 OK, a useful tip for boyfriends, when your gf is crying because of something that you've done... It's OK to say "I am sorry that you are feeling bad" - AND MEAN IT - without saying (or meaning) "I am sorry for what I did that made you feel bad"... It's OK for her to be sad at the thought of missing you... It's even kinda cute that she was, isn't it...? It doesn't mean that you have to do anything differently... It doesn't even mean that she WANTS you to do anything different... Girls are generally OK with feeling sad about stuff, just because we feel a bit sad... And our body chemistry means that when we feel sad, the tears mostly just kinda happen... Probably all you needed to do was hug her and say "Yeah, we have had a fabulous few days, haven't we. I will miss you too. You are wonderful." Yes. I guess this is a good tip for men, but why do we as women have to do this? She spent 5 days with him for god's sake, and will see him again in a couple of days! She should kiss him goodbye, and go cry to herself quietly, then get busy with her own life until he gets back. So B3, no, don't feel bad. Yes kiss her and hug her, but she'll be fine. Her reaction seems over the top and too needy to me, but I'm just different I guess. I don't want my man to ever see me as clingy.
Double Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 So B3, no, don't feel bad. Yes kiss her and hug her, but she'll be fine. Her reaction seems over the top and too needy to me, but I'm just different I guess. I don't want my man to ever see me as clingy. Pretty much. But I would also like to point out that the "I'm sorry you're feeling bad" statements should be used SPARINGLY (sorry OP but you sound young), and only when there is a 100% chance that you really didn't do a single thing wrong. Too many guys use that sentence as a cop out.
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