aloneinseattle Posted October 11, 2009 Posted October 11, 2009 Well it is going on 2 months of NC, and I have been working out and trying to keep my mind of my ex.... But suddenly I have been having dreams about her and I am starting to miss her again. I really don't know what I can do to just completely get her out of my mind and life. Today I woke up very sad and heart broke and felt like I miss her all over again.... When will this pain and suffering end?
Soul Bear Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 Hey Bro, Sorry to here you are going through this. I know the stage you're at exactly...and you're so close ... I'll give it another few months and you will be 100% again Well done in Keeping up NC for 2 months. It's so hard at first. Doesn't it just get so much easier?! Like you don't even want to talk to them?! When i suddenly got in a relapse with dreams like that I changed the direction I slept in to North east. Had a propper nights sleep for the first time in ages. Give it a shot... The pain and suffering is good, and it will end when youb start to feel like you don't need her in your life, or want her in your life. Why would you want to make anyone in your life a priority when they only made you an option?
tryagaintoday Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 Wow! So you just change direction of your sleep and it works? I must try that today. Never knew I would so hate dreaming about her..
Author aloneinseattle Posted October 12, 2009 Author Posted October 12, 2009 Change the direction I sleep..hmm I will give it a try to see if it works, thanks for the words of encouragement hope your right
adamt Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 its been 4 months of NC for me. Sometimes the dreams just happen. like for me last night. Try reading a book before going to bed so you ex is not on your mind just before going to sleep.
quarterlifecrisis Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 I gotta give it a try too...the dreams are killing me. It makes sense though - if you change your orientation it's no longer as familiar. When I was on vacation and a business trip the past few weeks, I dreamt about her a lot less, but as soon as I returned home I totally relapsed. Going to give it a shot tonight and see how it goes.
Author aloneinseattle Posted October 12, 2009 Author Posted October 12, 2009 I figured it out the time the dreams really kick in is when I sleep on "her side" of the bed.
Soul Bear Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 Just to clarify here, it wasn't JUST changing my direction. It takes a whole lot of self reflection and making positive changes in your life, knowing your worth etc etc to get over them, but I'm guessing you guys already know that. Good luck, and keep us posted on your sleeping patters It's to do with your Gau Direction (forgotten the correct spelling) Basicly try sleeping head facing 90 degrees to the left of your current position. This will involve a bit of room alteration!
ATR Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 Haha, i'm not sure the sleeping directions should be taken so literally (i guess it is part of "change":p), but whatever floats your boat Seems natural to me, the healing process is a weird one. We think we're over then then BAM! they're back in our minds. Keep doing what you're doing, you'll be rid of the pain that weighs your heart down soon.
JaggedRoad Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 Just to clarify here, it wasn't JUST changing my direction. It takes a whole lot of self reflection and making positive changes in your life, knowing your worth etc etc to get over them, but I'm guessing you guys already know that. Good luck, and keep us posted on your sleeping patters It's to do with your Gau Direction (forgotten the correct spelling) Basicly try sleeping head facing 90 degrees to the left of your current position. This will involve a bit of room alteration! Is that some sort of Chinese "change your environment and scenery" thing? I might actually try that
Soul Bear Posted October 12, 2009 Posted October 12, 2009 (edited) I didn't want to get technical, but seeing as you're asking- Basicly our bodies contain metal elements and blood flow etc can all be altered by magnetic forces. Just as a compass will only point north when it's facing north, the human body is somewhat the same. You are magentised, so surely the effects of magnetic poles will effect certain elements of function. I slept North direction and I had 'nightmares' every night for 2 months when I was in the same state as the OP- Almost healed up. I changed to NE direction as I have alwats found sleeping that direction I get the most peaceful nights sleep. Sure enough I was fine, and although I still dreamed about her much much much less, it was totally different. Another night I slept North again and it was back to being bad again and waking up. Jagged Road- I think you are refering to 'Feng Shui'. Some of it can be quite helpful for creating a peaceful environment, but at the end of the day, just go with your gut and what you think is best or feels best to you I sound totally bananas, so I'm going to stop here Edited October 12, 2009 by Soul Bear
tryagaintoday Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 I tried that for a few nights now and I dreamt of her twice. They are in colours as well. 1st one, I was with my friends driving around the car. Then I remember needing to meet her, so I asked them to drive me back. When I get back, she jumps on me as usual, she is wearing her usual orange tee. I thought everything was alright again, then I woke up. 2nd one, I'm suppose to meet my current gf and was wondering what to wear. Saw my favourite jeans and was thinking of putting that on. Then I remember I am I going to meet her on Saturday so I "save" the jeans for that day and picked something else. Saturday came and I was wearing my fav jeans, she wore something that I'd never seen before. Some blue and white tee. Then I woke up. In real life, I am meeting my current gf on Sat! Hell, I'm gonna put on that jeans just for her. Hope she don't show up in some blue and white tee... Anyway, although I still have dreams about her, at least I don't feel so ****ty as I usually do.
Soul Bear Posted October 18, 2009 Posted October 18, 2009 Any updates?! : It does depend on how long you guys have been apart too. No matter what direction or where I slept, I still dreamed of her for about 4 months post breakup. In the end (the last 2 months dreaming of her or so) She was a complete bit*h to me in my dreams, so it did make it a bit easier TrAgainToday--Were those dreams a result of changing your direction?
quarterlifecrisis Posted October 19, 2009 Posted October 19, 2009 I've been traveling quite a bit and sleeping in different hotel beds every night. It has helped a ton to be in a new area. My dreams have been kept to a minimum except for one night after she broke NC by messaging me. The night after that I was totally tore up, but beyond that, sleeping in new environments/directions definitely helps you break out of the same pattern IMO.
tryagaintoday Posted October 21, 2009 Posted October 21, 2009 Any updates?! : It does depend on how long you guys have been apart too. No matter what direction or where I slept, I still dreamed of her for about 4 months post breakup. In the end (the last 2 months dreaming of her or so) She was a complete bit*h to me in my dreams, so it did make it a bit easier TrAgainToday--Were those dreams a result of changing your direction? Yeah, I adjusted the direction a little. But I think the main factor is time. The more time passes, the less dreams I have of her. Also it may be due to me having new dates as well. Well 1 interesting thing that came out from the dreams is that, when I finally meet her on that fateful Saturday, she was wearing her orange tee. Talk about scary. Anyway, I was very indifferent towards her that day, I think I only said 3 words "Ok, yeah and bye". Didn't even see her drive away because I'll be meeting my potential love of my love later that day.
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