Surfer Girl Posted October 11, 2009 Posted October 11, 2009 I have been doing yoga for years... he never was interested.... I got him to go to the gym... and he loved it.... now he has moved on to yoga... the class I attend.... I did not look at him... we both walked out at the same time... He said Hi... noticed my new sunglasses... have to admit the glasses make me look good.... Asked him if he was ok going to yoga with me there.... he said... I will do the best that I can???? Asked about the surfboard he wanted to give me.... He said his friend had it to give to me.... I will call his friend tomorro to pick it up.... Its been close to 3 months NC up until last week NC until he text me about wanting to give me the surfboard.... I have very little time to attend yoga and this class fits my schedule.... I do not want to give it up.... I am hoping he won't attend next week.... But if he does.... then I will just have to live with it.... This is quite difficult as it is much easier to have NC.... I just won't give up what I love to do just because he is there.... I was there long before he was.... This somewhat changes the dynamic of NC, and I feel I handled myself very well... yet I am somewhat afraid this could cause setbacks... I feel much stronger thanks to the time of NC....but with a 7 year history it will take time... I am somewhat angry that he invaded a joy that I have done alone and love to do..... I guess I am rambling and am wondering if anyone out there has had to deal with a situation such as this???and how did you handle it???
seoa Posted October 11, 2009 Posted October 11, 2009 Chances are he's vaguely missing you, and wants some kind of half-assed minimal contact... Or (and is this what you're hoping??) maybe he's regretting the split and wanting you back... Only you know what's right for you - but if it suits you, then I think you can text him to say "Glad you're getting more into sport, but that's my yoga class and I'd rather you didn't go. Please respect that." (assuming he will respect that - is he basically a decent guy, or has he been a nightmare about respecting your need for NC?) Ultimately, it doesn't really matter if he has to know you're not over him enough to become his yoga buddy... Better he finds that out as a one-off text, rather than be convinced of it every week until you have to leave the class you love... Of course, if you're hoping it's a step on the way to him coming back to you, then you have to do what feels right to you... You will no doubt get a lot of advice from here saying "Don't do it, stay NC, keep the ex out of your life at all costs", because let's face it, that's often the right advice... But only you know which course of action you will regret more in a year's time... Good luck with it all...
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