Wow us women have it so good when it comes to dating

[musicfan876]

Action favors the woman and she can pick but why is every other woman complaining that the guy she's with is a jerk? or that she's dissatsfied?

 

The best relationships are the ones where the relationship is pretty equal.

 

 

If women can pick there is no way a relationship can be equal. That already gives women a disproportionate amount of power over men.

 

The only negative thing is this power might be why some men act like jerks.

[Hkizzle]

If women can pick there is no way a relationship can be equal. That already gives women a disproportionate amount of power over men.

 

The only negative thing is this power might be why some men act like jerks.

 

Yes, but MEN PROPOSE MARRIAGE! Women select which men they start a relationship with, but it's the men that decide to finally commit or not.

 

Have you ever wondered my in just about every single culture of the world, throughout all human history it's the men that propose?

 

Simply because whilst it's the woman that says "yes" or "no", the real power is in the one LEAST commited to the relationship. Thus you have to get the person least commited to the relationship to want to commit to marriage for the marriage to last.

 

If women proposed to men as soon as they were ready to commit to a man, there would be huge number of men running off, or freaking out on wedding day.

 

Go study some basic social science and it's well researched why men do the proposing.

[You'reasian]

If women can pick there is no way a relationship can be equal. That already gives women a disproportionate amount of power over men.

 

A man doesn't have to date any woman he doesn't wanna. Some of us guys are picky when it comes to relationships.

 

When it comes to dating........not so much lol

[musicfan876]

Yes, but MEN PROPOSE MARRIAGE! Women select which men they start a relationship with, but it's the men that decide to finally commit or not.

 

Have you ever wondered my in just about every single culture of the world, throughout all human history it's the men that propose?

 

Simply because whilst it's the woman that says "yes" or "no", the real power is in the one LEAST commited to the relationship. Thus you have to get the person least commited to the relationship to want to commit to marriage for the marriage to last.

 

If women proposed to men as soon as they were ready to commit to a man, there would be huge number of men running off, or freaking out on wedding day.

 

Go study some basic social science and it's well researched why men do the proposing.

 

No because once again women get to pick.

 

Men have to get on one knee (seems submissive) , women get to decide and women get expensive engagement rings.

 

Has a woman ever bought a man an equally expensive engagement present or done an equal amount of work?

 

NO. and never will.

[Star Gazer]

Yes, but MEN PROPOSE MARRIAGE! Women select which men they start a relationship with, but it's the men that decide to finally commit or not.

 

And he waits for her to make the final call, and say yes.

 

Simply because whilst it's the woman that says "yes" or "no", the real power is in the one LEAST commited to the relationship.

 

Who has more power? Certainly not the guy down on his knee....

[musicfan876]

Ok, whatever. You're wasting everyone's time on a baseless theory and a pissing contest. You have no real desire to seek the truth.

 

Btw, of course the man gets on one knee, acts submissive and offers a big engagement ring. If he doesn't do that, it shows lack of commitment, which is the thing women complain about in men time and time again. Most women on average have relationships with 10 men in their lifetimes to find one that will commit.

 

 

look either way men serve women.

 

otherwise women would have to demonstrate commitment too by buying the man a gift and taking him somewhere special.

 

remember most divorces are filed by women but women are exempt from this even though women are LESS committed.

[musicfan876]

No, but the 9 guys that strung the girl along and didn't commit had the power.........

 

Hence this is one of the biggest reasons why women feel helpless when a man is not treating her well and not commiting.

 

Until he does commit the woman has less power.

 

So basically relationship dynamics shifts from women having power at the start to men, and then back to women again if the man commits. If he doesn't commit then he has the power in between. Hence this is why so many men fear commitment.

 

 

eventually men lose the power though and have to get on one knee and buy engagement rings.

 

Nothing is more DEGRADING than having to get on one knee and beg and have to compensate the woman for marriage.

 

If men were dominant women would be on their knee and buying men watches, jet skis, t.v's.

[musicfan876]

And he waits for her to make the final call, and say yes.

 

 

 

Who has more power? Certainly not the guy down on his knee....

 

 

i agree with the second point.

 

but the first one is ridiculous and stupid.

 

how many men propose without the couple having discussed marriage before?

 

zero.

 

but getting on one knee and paying to get married is submissive.

 

it is the dominant who has the submissive get on one knee and buy gifts.

[musicfan876]

Well like I said, you're in a pissing contest and clearly have a sexist agenda. Totally wasting everyone's time.

 

 

i was just wondering why you men don't do anything to get an equal amount of power.

 

if i was a man i would refuse to go through that proposal crap. the getting down on one knee comes from when knights would essentially be servants to royalty. and paying for engagement gifts?

 

seriously if men had any common sense they would stop getting on one knee, buying gifts and demanding women do 50% of the work.

 

but they don't.

 

so this reinforces how much power women have over men.

[musicfan876]

Well, since you're going on about power. In most of the world men do have common sense and don't act like American men. In many Islamic countries women wear veils that cover most of their body, and in Saudi Arabia they can't even drive.

 

In most of Asia men frequent prostitues very often and women turn a blind eye because there's not much they can do.

 

No in America women have a lot more power. But are people really happy? No, I mean just look at this board. Plenty of people are very unhappy about their love lives.

 

What's with this pissing contest you guys always have? I think the Europeans have it the best, and I don't live in Europe.

 

You do realize in Europe men do not always propose or buy rings.

 

The German tradition is for both to have engagement rings which are then worn as marriage rings. And plenty of couples there just discuss marriage and go shopping for their rings (not her's).

 

this doesn't apply to american society does it?

[sweetjasmine]

Well, since you're going on about power. In most of the world men do have common sense and don't act like American men. In many Islamic countries women wear veils that cover most of their body, and in Saudi Arabia they can't even drive.

 

In most of Asia men frequent prostitues very often and women turn a blind eye because there's not much they can do.

 

No in America women have a lot more power. But are people really happy? No, I mean just look at this board. Plenty of people are very unhappy about their love lives.

 

Are you seriously suggesting that not subjugating women makes people unhappy?

 

Are you seriously taking this board -- which is meant for people with problems and hardly ever attracts people who are happy -- as a representative sample of relationships in the US/Canada? That makes as much sense as going to a lung cancer support forum for Americans and concluding that the vast majority of people in America have lung cancer.

[musicfan876]

Are you seriously suggesting that not subjugating women makes people unhappy?

 

Are you seriously taking this board -- which is meant for people with problems and hardly ever attracts people who are happy -- as a representative sample of relationships in the US/Canada? That makes as much sense as going to a lung cancer support forum for Americans and concluding that the vast majority of people in America have lung cancer.

 

 

doesn't change the fact that women hold the power and men are submissive lol.

[SadandConfusedWA]

The true power in any romantic relationship is always with the person that cares less. This can be at the initial stages of dating or later and it has nothing to do with gender.

[SadandConfusedWA]

On an individual basis yes. Across an entire population. No.

 

Individual basis is all that matters to us really. Overall trends are only interesting for statistical purposes but statistics doesn't apply to a sample size of one.

[theBrokenMuse]

i feel so bad for men. look at how good dating is for us women.

Considering the content and the tone of your posts, I am not entirely sure you really ARE a woman as opposed to a male posing as a woman in order to catch less flack from the female LS users but let's play pretend and continue on.

 

Men chase women. There is no such thing as a woman who chases a man.

Nonsense. I have seen women who aggressively pursue a man to the point of making themselves look stalkerish.

Since a woman has so many options she becomes choosier than the man.

Sure, as long as she fits the right physical model, or doesn't have too many kids... otherwise not so much.

The average man will never have as many women chasing him as the average woman has men chasing her.

Didn't you just get done saying that women don't chase men? This article didn't even stay consistent for one entire paragraph.

Women do not consider a man's character or looks. They look at his accomplishments. The love is shallow.

One thing about this line, despite the whole, not being based in reality issue that needs to be brought up is if women were to consider looks, how would this make the love 'less' shallow?

Therefore if men and women started asking out in equal numbers the rejection would still fall on the man.

Honestly, I think it would depend on more than just gender but I have no way of being able to say anything definitive on the subject as I haven't done any research into this.

Women date multiple men or more men.

Not all women. Just as some men play the field, not all.

Only women have lists of back up men. If a man does the woman’s list is longer.

The word only suggests that it is squarely one party doing this which you then turn around and say well, men do it too but they do it with less people? According to whom and how much of a margin are we talking?

Women rarely have to compete or physically fight over men as much as men do over women.

Women compete with other women over men ALL THE TIME. It's an external validation thing. It totally sucks that women fall prey to this behavior but it is not uncommon at all.

even other women admit it and brag about it.

You can find people that will brag about all kinds of bad, destructive, immoral, outrageous, illegal or stupid behavior. What's your point?

With that said, yes, when you run into a gal, she's going to have a guy "on the line".

With that said, you presume far too much.

[espec10001]

As a man, I'm going to take a different point of view.

 

In certain cases I feel bad for women. Now ladies don't take this as I view you as the weaker sex, but lets think about it. Many women have to rely on their looks to get attention or what they want, and these looks do not last forever. They have to paint their face, they have to wear skimpy clothing, push up bras, perfume, you name it. It sort of "objectifies" them.

 

Men, on the other hand, while they can't look like a total slob, do not need to worry as much about their appearance. Men are more concerned with their accomplishments and achievements, what they have done in their life. For many men simply having a girlfriend or wife is a reward for hard work and accomplishment. And accomplishment is also rewarded by money.

 

That is why I say the most attractive man is the accomplished man not just because he has money, but because he has achieved goals that he set out for himself. For many men this takes a long time, and they may not achieve their goals until later in life, but they strive for it until they do. This is why women are most attracted to men with ambition. If a man wants an attractive caring wife, he has to accomplish something great in his own sense.

 

This is why I say that women don't have it as good as it seems. Men have much more time to strive for goals while women are on a ticking clock of youth and fertility. Men of accomplishment always have the upper hand because they can say "Look what I've done".

 

In my view, a man should not have a romantic relationship with a woman until he has achieved his personal goals. All men have a vision of what kind of woman they want, but to get this beautiful woman, they have to have great personally defined accomplishment first. They strive for the unattainable and if they die before achieving it, they can rest peacefully knowing they gave it their all. It is why men of passion are most attractive to women.

Edited October 9, 2009 by espec10001

[BlueHarvest]

Well said espec. Was refreshing to see a post like that in this thread.

[musicfan876]

As a man, I'm going to take a different point of view.

 

In certain cases I feel bad for women. Now ladies don't take this as I view you as the weaker sex, but lets think about it. Many women have to rely on their looks to get attention or what they want, and these looks do not last forever. They have to paint their face, they have to wear skimpy clothing, push up bras, perfume, you name it. It sort of "objectifies" them.

 

Men, on the other hand, while they can't look like a total slob, do not need to worry as much about their appearance. Men are more concerned with their accomplishments and achievements, what they have done in their life. For many men simply having a girlfriend or wife is a reward for hard work and accomplishment. And accomplishment is also rewarded by money.

 

That is why I say the most attractive man is the accomplished man not just because he has money, but because he has achieved goals that he set out for himself. For many men this takes a long time, and they may not achieve their goals until later in life, but they strive for it until they do. This is why women are most attracted to men with ambition. If a man wants an attractive caring wife, he has to accomplish something great in his own sense.

 

This is why I say that women don't have it as good as it seems. Men have much more time to strive for goals while women are on a ticking clock of youth and fertility. Men of accomplishment always have the upper hand because they can say "Look what I've done".

 

In my view, a man should not have a romantic relationship with a woman until he has achieved his personal goals. All men have a vision of what kind of woman they want, but to get this beautiful woman, they have to have great personally defined accomplishment first. They strive for the unattainable and if they die before achieving it, they can rest peacefully knowing they gave it their all. It is why men of passion are most attractive to women.

 

 

all this means is women get men with great characteristics but women don't have to be accomplished, passionate or skilled themselves.

 

so men get ok mates and women get great ones.

 

women still win. nothing will change that lol.

[Skump]

The poster above has it basically right IMO. This idea that women have overwhelming power in romantic relationships is a canard: it may be true for a very brief span of time, but on a long timeline it's false.

 

I think it's helpful to analyze courting... economically. Think of everything that a potential partner offers as being an asset or a liability (or risk). Good looks - asset. Good education - asset. Past criminal history - liability. Mental illness - liability. Et Cetera.

 

The problem for women is that just one asset - their physical attractiveness - is disproportionately weighted in guys' estimation of a woman's "value proposition." And unlike prestige, wealth, educational accomplishment, etc., all of which can increase with age, physical attractiveness is a rapidly depreciating asset, especially for women.

 

What does this mean? Well, let's make a value plot in our imaginations for two hypothetical potential partners, a man and a woman of comparable accomplishment and age. Imagine two graphs, with time on x and "total human value, gender adjusted" () on y, for the man and woman respectively. "Total human value, gender adjusted" is the sum of the values of assets and liabilities as each asset/liability is generally valued by the opposite gender. Where the value plot of the woman is higher than the man, she has higher relationship power; where the value plot of the man is higher than the woman, he has higher negotiating power.

 

Think about what these graphs are going to look like. Let's start at age, say, 18, and take a narrative journey thorough the economics of partner valuation.

 

At age 18, the woman has begun to enter physical maturity, the bloom of her youth. Her physical asset hasn't quite reached the peak of its value, but it's close. What about the guy? Well, okay, he's cute, but he won't look as manly as he will at 30, and he's still a useless college freshman. No accomplishments, no money, no proven character virtues, nada. In other words, in all the areas in which women value men most, the guy is at his value nadir right now. Although the woman isn't any more accomplished, her physical asset is near the peak of its value as weighted by men, and guys aren't weighting her (non-existant) career accomplishments with nearly so much importance.

 

So at age 18, the woman's graph is far above the guy's. The woman's value proposition is much higher and thus she has more negotiating power. Moreover, this dynamic will persist for several years, because the basic circumstances won't change. On an economic calculus, this is a bad time to be in the dating scene for our guy. If they met, our young woman would probably pass him over.

 

However, below the surface, changes are brewing. College doesn't last forever, and neither does youth.

 

Over the last four years, the guy has been making connections. Let's say he's decided he wants to be a lawyer, and has been working hard on LSAT prep. He even scored a good internship and spends the year after graduation doing doc review at a respected law firm. Then the scores come back - he's going to a t14 baby! Our heroine hasn't been any slouch either, mind, and has comparable professional hopes; moreover, she's now at the absolute zenith of her physical beauty. Problem is, her most highly-weighted asset is now on a precipitous slope of depreciation. As in so many cases in history, the greatest glory comes right before the fall. This is the last point at which the woman's value graph will exceed the guy's.

 

It's going to be subtle, but it's going to happen fast. The guy proceeds through law school. He's no feckless pube now, but a young professional with hopes of making up to 150K per year with bonuses upon graduation. Moreover, his looks have improved. He's better built and more confident - he seems more like a man. He's 26 and ready to enter the world like a lion. He has everything going for him and time is on his side.

 

What about the woman? Tick... tick... tick... "Still not married yet, dear?" whines her Mom. "Rasing kids is so difficult when you're old - you know, like 30" gripes Grandma. It all seems a little silly. It's not like it's hard for the 26 year old woman to get dates. But something has changed. Boys aren't throwing themselves at her anymore - though lots of guys she dates still just really want sex (that hasn't, and never will, change). Moreover, Facebook reveals that lot of those cute guys she passed over in college as being "not quite right" are now... married. There's no shortage of "not right guys," of course, but most are more than a little "not right," these days. From the human perspective, the change was almost too subtle to notice, but our graphs reveal the truth: the guy and woman's value plots have intersected. For the woman, it's all down hill from here.

 

Time goes by - our hero and heroine hit 30. Just like the man, our woman has continued to build up professional accomplishments. However, men won't value her professional accomplishments as highly as she will theirs, and although no single male asset is valued as highly by woman as physical beauty is valued by men, there are now several assets well-weighted by women that are appreciating in our young man, whereas the woman's chief asset is steadily depreciating. Moreover, his looks have just reached their peak, and if he takes care of himself he could remain very handsome for a decade or more. Our woman also has another problem - a major liability has appeared. As an unmarried woman entering her 30s, any pregnancy will now be geriatric. Her fitness as a potential mother is thus also depreciating.

 

Thus we enter the long part of the graph, whose trend will characterize the lives of our man and woman until death. In this region, the man's value plot is forever above that of the woman's. Barring severe disfigurement, mental illness or complete financial destruction, he would always have the upper hand in a relationship with her.

 

The woman feels the changes. They're now impossible to ignore. Almost all of the best men are married - often snatched years ago by less attractive but more forward-thinking, cunning and aggressive women. Those that remain are either closted gays, players, or guys who know the score, and are primarily interested younger girls. The woman must now face an ugly reality: Her relationship prospects are not improving, and her options will only get worse with each passing year. The heinous "S" word is on the lips of her mother in every other conversation, and the woman has no retort. It's true, after all. If she wants to marry, she's probably going to have to settle.

 

And she'd better settle fast. Oh for the days when settling might've meant marrying that cute-but-a-bit-shy-and-bookish-boy from Bio2 who could barely work up the courage to ask her out. He's now a surgeon with a 24 year old wife from Croatia and has two kids. He's not that shy anymore, either. He drives a porche.

 

Still, she does have a date lined up with Phil, that cute artist she met over eHarmony. He seems nice. He's struggling, of course, but that's what artists do, right? It probably means his work is provocative. He's also totally over that problem with drinking he had when he was in college (what was the name of that college? She can't remember). Besides, she tells herself, money, prestige... none of that's so important, right? Her mom and friends are just being shallow when they needle her about the guy's she's dating these days. Maybe she's just worrying herself needlessly anyway: Her spirits were buoyed by a thread she read in a relationship advice internet forum. Almost everyone there said women have the upper hand in relationships. Well, everyone except some guy with a weird name and a long, boring post that she didn't bother to really read.

 

It's just like they said, she tells herself: It's women who choose. She can choose to reject this struggling artist, just like she rejected all those guys in college; like John, who had that weird curly hair (now a Wharton MBA at Goldman), and Steve, who had that annoying laugh (Entertainment Attorney in LA). She rejected them, and if this doesn't work out, she can reject this guy too.

 

Because she's a woman, and it's women who do the choosing... right?

[espec10001]

all this means is women get men with great characteristics but women don't have to be accomplished, passionate or skilled themselves.

 

so men get ok mates and women get great ones.

 

women still win. nothing will change that lol.

 

That isn't true. Think about it: If you were a girl, and had to do your hair, makeup, different clothes all the time and constantly obsessed with how you look, (not to mention high heels boy that looks painful!) I don't think you'd feel the same. Girls all dolled up don't just roll out of bed like that, they have to take the time to make themselves like that. And it's a shame because most don't even need to do all that to look pretty but it is the society we live in. We're always fed what is attractive and women see men ogling at porn stars and actresses and models and they want to feel that same attraction from their men, so they imitate it.

 

But women that I know DO have skills, ARE intelligent AND actually aren't all that different from men aside from physical attributes. My fondest and most fun memories are with women. They like having fun and being appreciated, just like men!

 

Heck, I'm a guy sticking up for women! And no I'm not gay, I just probably love women a little too much.

[musicfan876]

The poster above has it basically right IMO. This idea that women have overwhelming power in romantic relationships is a canard: it may be true for a very brief span of time, but on a long timeline it's false.

 

I think it's helpful to analyze courting... economically. Think of everything that a potential partner offers as being an asset or a liability (or risk). Good looks - asset. Good education - asset. Past criminal history - liability. Mental illness - liability. Et Cetera.

 

The problem for women is that just one asset - their physical attractiveness - is disproportionately weighted in guys' estimation of a woman's "value proposition." And unlike prestige, wealth, educational accomplishment, etc., all of which can increase with age, physical attractiveness is a rapidly depreciating asset, especially for women.

 

What does this mean? Well, let's make a value plot in our imaginations for two hypothetical potential partners, a man and a woman of comparable accomplishment and age. Imagine two graphs, with time on x and "total human value, gender adjusted" () on y, for the man and woman respectively. "Total human value, gender adjusted" is the sum of the values of assets and liabilities as each asset/liability is generally valued by the opposite gender. Where the value plot of the woman is higher than the man, she has higher relationship power; where the value plot of the man is higher than the woman, he has higher negotiating power.

 

Think about what these graphs are going to look like. Let's start at age, say, 18, and take a narrative journey thorough the economics of partner valuation.

 

At age 18, the woman has begun to enter physical maturity, the bloom of her youth. Her physical asset hasn't quite reached the peak of its value, but it's close. What about the guy? Well, okay, he's cute, but he won't look as manly as he will at 30, and he's still a useless college freshman. No accomplishments, no money, no proven character virtues, nada. In other words, in all the areas in which women value men most, the guy is at his value nadir right now. Although the woman isn't any more accomplished, her physical asset is near the peak of its value as weighted by men, and guys aren't weighting her (non-existant) career accomplishments with nearly so much importance.

 

So at age 18, the woman's graph is far above the guy's. The woman's value proposition is much higher and thus she has more negotiating power. Moreover, this dynamic will persist for several years, because the basic circumstances won't change. On an economic calculus, this is a bad time to be in the dating scene for our guy. If they met, our young woman would probably pass him over.

 

However, below the surface, changes are brewing. College doesn't last forever, and neither does youth.

 

Over the last four years, the guy has been making connections. Let's say he's decided he wants to be a lawyer, and has been working hard on LSAT prep. He even scored a good internship and spends the year after graduation doing doc review at a respected law firm. Then the scores come back - he's going to a t14 baby! Our heroine hasn't been any slouch either, mind, and has comparable professional hopes; moreover, she's now at the absolute zenith of her physical beauty. Problem is, her most highly-weighted asset is now on a precipitous slope of depreciation. As in so many cases in history, the greatest glory comes right before the fall. This is the last point at which the woman's value graph will exceed the guy's.

 

It's going to be subtle, but it's going to happen fast. The guy proceeds through law school. He's no feckless pube now, but a young professional with hopes of making up to 150K per year with bonuses upon graduation. Moreover, his looks have improved. He's better built and more confident - he seems more like a man. He's 26 and ready to enter the world like a lion. He has everything going for him and time is on his side.

 

What about the woman? Tick... tick... tick... "Still not married yet, dear?" whines her Mom. "Rasing kids is so difficult when you're old - you know, like 30" gripes Grandma. It all seems a little silly. It's not like it's hard for the 26 year old woman to get dates. But something has changed. Boys aren't throwing themselves at her anymore - though lots of guys she dates still just really want sex (that hasn't, and never will, change). Moreover, Facebook reveals that lot of those cute guys she passed over in college as being "not quite right" are now... married. There's no shortage of "not right guys," of course, but most are more than a little "not right," these days. From the human perspective, the change was almost too subtle to notice, but our graphs reveal the truth: the guy and woman's value plots have intersected. For the woman, it's all down hill from here.

 

Time goes by - our hero and heroine hit 30. Just like the man, our woman has continued to build up professional accomplishments. However, men won't value her professional accomplishments as highly as she will theirs, and although no single male asset is valued as highly by woman as physical beauty is valued by men, there are now several assets well-weighted by women that are appreciating in our young man, whereas the woman's chief asset is steadily depreciating. Moreover, his looks have just reached their peak, and if he takes care of himself he could remain very handsome for a decade or more. Our woman also has another problem - a major liability has appeared. As an unmarried woman entering her 30s, any pregnancy will now be geriatric. Her fitness as a potential mother is thus also depreciating.

 

Thus we enter the long part of the graph, whose trend will characterize the lives of our man and woman until death. In this region, the man's value plot is forever above that of the woman's. Barring severe disfigurement, mental illness or complete financial destruction, he would always have the upper hand in a relationship with her.

 

The woman feels the changes. They're now impossible to ignore. Almost all of the best men are married - often snatched years ago by less attractive but more forward-thinking, cunning and aggressive women. Those that remain are either closted gays, players, or guys who know the score, and are primarily interested younger girls. The woman must now face an ugly reality: Her relationship prospects are not improving, and her options will only get worse with each passing year. The heinous "S" word is on the lips of her mother in every other conversation, and the woman has no retort. It's true, after all. If she wants to marry, she's probably going to have to settle.

 

And she'd better settle fast. Oh for the days when settling might've meant marrying that cute-but-a-bit-shy-and-bookish-boy from Bio2 who could barely work up the courage to ask her out. He's now a surgeon with a 24 year old wife from Croatia and has two kids. He's not that shy anymore, either. He drives a porche.

 

Still, she does have a date lined up with Phil, that cute artist she met over eHarmony. He seems nice. He's struggling, of course, but that's what artists do, right? It probably means his work is provocative. He's also totally over that problem with drinking he had when he was in college (what was the name of that college? She can't remember). Besides, she tells herself, money, prestige... none of that's so important, right? Her mom and friends are just being shallow when they needle her about the guy's she's dating these days. Maybe she's just worrying herself needlessly anyway: Her spirits were buoyed by a thread she read in a relationship advice internet forum. Almost everyone there said women have the upper hand in relationships. Well, everyone except some guy with a weird name and a long, boring post that she didn't bother to really read.

 

It's just like they said, she tells herself: It's women who choose. She can choose to reject this struggling artist, just like she rejected all those guys in college; like John, who had that weird curly hair (now a Wharton MBA at Goldman), and Steve, who had that annoying laugh (Entertainment Attorney in LA). She rejected them, and if this doesn't work out, she can reject this guy too.

 

Because she's a woman, and it's women who do the choosing... right?

 

 

yes but only women get to marry up and marry men with prestige and money.

 

what do men get? they work hard, accomplish everything , make money only to get a woman who is not that smart.

 

plus he has to work long hours which means more stress and he might die earlier not to mention those women could take his wealth in a divorce.

 

if men had the choice more men would be the ones marrying up when older.

[sweetjasmine]

No, I'm saying the battle of the sexes makes people unhappy. Or even more unhappy. In places where people accept their distinct but different social roles people coexist in a better way.

 

and no, I'm not just looking at this board. I can simply look at the divorce rate. If 50% of Americans had lung cancer, I would tell them to take a look at the air they're breathing.

 

The battle of the sexes is incredibly stupid, but saying "women do X, men do Y!" or "why do men do this? why do women do that?" only perpetuates that mindset.

 

And you can't compare divorce rates across countries with different divorce laws. If country X allows no-fault divorce with no waiting period, you're going to get different statistics than you'd get in country Y where no-fault isn't allowed and you have to wait 3 years before actually divorcing. It also only tells you what happens with married couples while ignoring every other relationship that doesn't result in legal marriage. It's still a sampling error.

[musicfan876]

That isn't true. Think about it: If you were a girl, and had to do your hair, makeup, different clothes all the time and constantly obsessed with how you look, (not to mention high heels boy that looks painful!) I don't think you'd feel the same. Girls all dolled up don't just roll out of bed like that, they have to take the time to make themselves like that. And it's a shame because most don't even need to do all that to look pretty but it is the society we live in. We're always fed what is attractive and women see men ogling at porn stars and actresses and models and they want to feel that same attraction from their men, so they imitate it.

 

But women that I know DO have skills, ARE intelligent AND actually aren't all that different from men aside from physical attributes. My fondest and most fun memories are with women. They like having fun and being appreciated, just like men!

 

Heck, I'm a guy sticking up for women! And no I'm not gay, I just probably love women a little too much.

 

 

but you have to pay for everything, make all the calls, women are harder to deal with, you have to give more support , you have to provide, give more in bed, do all the dirty work/heavy lifting at home and protect her. men have to make the biggest sacrifices.

 

so women have it better.

[jasonanderson]

a healthy dose of confidence can easily level out the playing field...that's what guys need to learn

[phineas]

but you have to pay for everything, make all the calls, women are harder to deal with, you have to give more support , you have to provide, give more in bed, do all the dirty work/heavy lifting at home and protect her. men have to make the biggest sacrifices.

 

so women have it better.

 

I don't date high maintenance princesses so I honestly don't experiance this.