scalcs Posted October 7, 2009 Posted October 7, 2009 is it possible for women to have sex with ex husband, who you shared two children with, and 12 years with, without emotioanl attachment.
JaneDoe35 Posted October 7, 2009 Posted October 7, 2009 That is a hard question. I would normally say NO, I have recently told my husband (we are separated) that I can no longer be intimate with him as it is not just sex for me, but love too. But maybe when you are the one who has walked away (male or female) you can separate sex from love.
Author scalcs Posted October 7, 2009 Author Posted October 7, 2009 she walked away from me, but I moved on, and just came to see the children, took myself out of the game emotioanlly, but then after 1 month of this she came to me saying she was lonely, and we had sex four times last week>.also she kisses me on the mouth, and we have cuddled in bed without sex>>trying to figure her out>.she tells me just wants to have sex, which is very good, we are good togehter. but i am just trying to understand what is going on, and if i should continue this
JaneDoe35 Posted October 7, 2009 Posted October 7, 2009 If I could I would love to be able to continue to be intimate with my husband, as at least then that is some kind of 'connection' between us. But I just get too sad afterwards and feel used. If you can be intimate with her and take it for what it is.......then I would if I were you. Probably not the best advice. When I discussed this issue with my counsellor, she said something along the lines of 'if you can be intimate but not let your mind make you feel guilty or used afterwards then it can sometimes be a good thing', she told me that if you can stop your mind playing tricks on you it can be done. But she stressed that this is very difficult to do.
Author scalcs Posted October 7, 2009 Author Posted October 7, 2009 so you are saying my ex wife, just wants sex and there is nothing else there, I just do not want to get wrapped up in her again, if there is no real love
JaneDoe35 Posted October 7, 2009 Posted October 7, 2009 No, what I am saying is that it might be just sex or more than sex. Only she knows. If you are willing and able to keep being intimate with her knowing that and can handle the risk of being hurt again then I would continue being intimate if I were you. I myself have not been able to do this as I am way too sensitive emotionally. I know how you feel though. It is such a hard decision to make. Most people would say don't do it.
trippi1432 Posted October 7, 2009 Posted October 7, 2009 Been there, done that and it was totally disgusting....all I could see were empty drunken unfeeling eyes...the mouth was moving and saying the right things, but the rest of him was pitiful. It will be more painful to do that backslide...and eventually they will blame you for calling you in the middle of the night and become hostile when you don't deserve it.
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