David Letterman Fiasco

[Jersey Shortie]

I was going to post this in the cheating section but I figure it's not really about advice on cheating and more of a good general relationship discussion.

 

I personally have always liked David Letterman. Upon hearing about this story, I have lost a lot of respect for him. The thing is that this man cheated alot on his long term gf/now wife. He gets blackmailed and that's clearly wrong. However, because he brings it up and jokes about it in attempt to thrwart the blackmailer, everyone is running around saying "that David Letterman might have cheated but he is a good guy basically". This good-ole-boy club. While his wife has been completely humilated. What are other thoughts on this? I just am tired of hearing about yet another male public figure that has completely humilated his life partner for other women. I can't imagine what his wife is going through with such a public and humilating experience. Finding out that he beded a younger women from his staff while people on the talk show come on playing it light. Other's thoughts on the situation?

[Trialbyfire]

JS, I'm anti-cheating to the max but with Letterman, he's just not important enough to matter.

 

As for public humiliation, I don't see it. Since when is she responsible for his behaviour or at fault for it? He's the lech.

 

Also, we don't know if the two had and still have an open relationship. Let's pretend they don't. If she stays with him, the burden falls on her for doing so.

[Island Girl]

Get a group of actors or entertainers together from either sex and you'll find those who cheat.

Get a group of lawyers or doctors together fron either sex and you'll find those who cheat.

It is the same with mechanics and housewives, etc.

 

When a woman cheats on her husband he is heartbroken too. It happens on both sides and it is hurtful. It does not matter the gender of the cheater or the cheated on.

In this world some people cheat on their partners.

 

David Letterman is an entertainer. That just happens to be his job. He does not attempt to dictate morality nor has he ever been up on a soapbox about how faithful he is or how everyone should be (unlike politicians).

 

I'm surprised this is going on as it has. I can't believe people don't have more to worry about in their own lives. Certainly there are things going on around the world that are more newsworthy.

[Jersey Shortie]

I never said women don't cheat but I am talking about this specific case with someone who is clearly a poplar public figure and all the other reasons that make this case specific to how people are responding.

 

And actually Letterman has busted jokes on other people in the news media that have been found cheating and even I think gave a moral comment on Sarah Palin's daughter.

 

JS, I'm anti-cheating to the max but with Letterman, he's just not important enough to matter.

 

As for public humiliation, I don't see it. Since when is she responsible for his behaviour or at fault for it? He's the lech.

 

Also, we don't know if the two had and still have an open relationship. Let's pretend they don't. If she stays with him, the burden falls on her for doing so.

 

Well I guess I don't mean public humilation in the sense where she should be embaressed. However, I do think when someone cheats, they are humilating their partner. I don' think it was an open relationship. He talked about how hurt she was by the situation.

[Tony T]

Last night, Letterman again acknowledged his transgressions and that he had hurt some people, especially his wife. He admitted that he has hurt his wife to the max and that the future of his marriage may be uncertain. He said he would have a lot of work to do to restore it.

 

There is simply nothing he can do to undo what he did. However, I think he's handling his sins as best he can under the circumstances. I don't think I've ever see a celebrity come out and confess in public like this. Given, he probably wouldn't have ever said a word had it not been for the blackmail attempt. That, too, would have been a good decision. Cheating at work and going back to the wifey and telling her all about it would have been pretty goofy.

 

Anyway, let's leave David alone. I also think because of him a LOT of wealthy men may think several times before they get into the same situation.

[Island Girl]

I never said women don't cheat but I am talking about this specific case with someone who is clearly a poplar public figure and all the other reasons that make this case specific to how people are responding.

 

And actually Letterman has busted jokes on other people in the news media that have been found cheating and even I think gave a moral comment on Sarah Palin's daughter.

 

He has been in comedy and the entertainment world long enough to know if you dish it out you have to be able to take it.

 

Some people are responding because they love a juicy case of deceit. They want to watch the train wreck.

 

Then there are those, such as myself, who couldn't care less and think making this part of the ongoing news headlines is ridiculous.

[Trialbyfire]

I didn't keep abreast of the situation with his BW being hurt. Let's hope that for her sake, there was no prenup and if there was one, it's lucrative. Beyond that, she has no personal power in this relationship, whether she stays or goes.

[JamesM]

Given, he probably wouldn't have ever said a word had it not been for the blackmail attempt.

 

My guess is that this is very true. And you say that is good, and at his age...maybe.

 

But I have a hard time believing that if all of these affairs/sexual rendezvous happened prior to March of this year (when he was married), then how long before they leaked out?

 

And when exactly did they occur? Within the past year or two? How many times and how many women?

 

I know I am being a bit curious, but it obviously is more than one woman (as he said) and more than one time each. And if they worked for him, then someone can become rich.

 

So many questions, and not enough people caring.

[clv0116]

But I have a hard time believing that if all of these affairs/sexual rendezvous happened prior to March of this year (when he was married), then how long before they leaked out?

 

If he was just married, there's bound to be a pre-nup that's more watertight than a frogs ass.

[Juniper22]

I saw it and read about it on the internet and in the news. Other than that, I don't put alot of stock into it. His choices/actions are his own and I'm sure he is aware of it.

[Left in a Lurch]

I never understood why anyone cares about a star's personal life so much.

If pretty much anyone that posts here was a star, they would be crucified by the public for something at one point or another.

 

If you think about some things you do, imagine if it became a national story and how blown out of proportion it would probably be.

 

For all we know the Letterman's had an open marriage, were basically separated, she slept with other guys, they were practically divorced, they had a threesome with the women he 'cheated' with...

 

He has a job entertaining on tv, that's as much as I care about his life.

I forget who it was but there was a public official that was extremely vocal about affairs of other officials and turns out he was having an affair and got caught.

 

I think anyone who wants to judge a public personality by their personal life should probably look at themselves and what they do behind closed doors critically and think how they would be judged by the public and I bet most people would not come off as saints, and many people would be in the very same position as Letterman.

[allina]

Americans have this pathetic need to control and expose complete stranger's sex lives

 

Unless you're my SO I don't care who you're having sex with, who you're in love with, who you're married to, etc.

[alphamale]

What are other thoughts on this?

if a man is rich or powerful or good looking enough to have multiple female partners then more power to him.

[bayouboi]

What happens to the OP's avatar if it's ever discovered that Jon Stewart is created from the same mold as Letterman?

 

BTW, alot of people toss out that it's okay for him to do what he did because he's an entertainer vs. those who cheat and are politicians because of the things they advocate. The thing is, as an entertainer, he's made his living making fun of these people for their behavior. In my opinion, this makes him just as much of a hypocrite. He's definitely going about it in a smart way, though, by making fun of himself as this seems to soothe a lot of public opinion about what he did, but I bet his wife isn't laughing.

[Island Girl]

BTW, alot of people toss out that it's okay for him to do what he did because he's an entertainer vs. those who cheat and are politicians because of the things they advocate.

 

Politicians should be held to a higher standard. Absolutely.

 

When someone campaigns they share their platform and what they stand for. And people elect them - to be their voice - based upon what they say and their actions.

 

If they are liars then we should not believe anything they say and should elect someone else because nothing they say can be believed.

If they are cheaters then they are capable of betrayal of the person who is supposed to be closest to them. So what would stop them from betraying "the people" who are the faceless nameless masses?

 

I am certainly not saying that politicians don't lie or cheat. But when they do and we find out about it there is definitely more to pay attention to and very good reason to scrutinize their actions. Whether they can maintain their career becomes questionable and understandably so.

 

However, entertainers whether actors or comedians, etc. are not speaking for us. We listen to them pretend or make light of serious situations.

They owe us nothing. Their personal life impacts those around them as ours does and that's all.

 

David Letterman is on TV for an hour each night reading a script from his writers and then interviews people. If people don't like him after this then they can choose not to watch his show - advertisers can pull their ads if they take offense. He made decisions and it will impact him as it will.

I don't think he is less funny. And I don't hold him or any entertainers in a place of respect or admiration. It is silly to do so.

I just want to tell these people, "C'mon people you don't even know him! You have no idea if he goes home and screams at everyone, hits his dog, or if he is generally kind, etc. Why do you care what he does in his personal life? You really know more about your neighbors than you do these entertainment people. In fact I doubt you'd care as much if the same thing happened to them. Or if you did care most would have the decency to tell themselves 'It is none of my business' and move along".

[Jersey Shortie]

Bay, if Jon Stewart was discovered to have an affair, I would loose respect for him too. Men who humilate their families and cheat are beyond respect.

 

 

 

Cheating at work and going back to the wifey and telling her all about it would have been pretty goofy.

 

Yeah, it's much better to cheat on her and treat her like a piece of trash to come home to while he humilates her by running around behind her back. That must be what real men do?

 

Anyway, let's leave David alone. I also think because of him a LOT of wealthy men may think several times before they get into the same situation.

 

See that's the attutide I am talking about. "Lets leave David alone", as if he deserves that kind of respect and space in *his* time of need. Who cares about the little wife at home that stood by his side for years and bore his son.

 

 

But I have a hard time believing that if all of these affairs/sexual rendezvous happened prior to March of this year (when he was married), then how long before they leaked out?

 

And when exactly did they occur? Within the past year or two? How many times and how many women?

 

I know I am being a bit curious, but it obviously is more than one woman (as he said) and more than one time each. And if they worked for him, then someone can become rich.

 

So many questions, and not enough people caring.

 

All those questions and thoughts ran through my head as well.

 

 

 

For all we know the Letterman's had an open marriage, were basically separated, she slept with other guys...

 

They just got married and David Letterman himself said his partner was very hurt by his actions. it's clear they didn't have an open marraige. Considering all the things he admitted to, he would have admitted to this as well so that he wouldn't like like as big as a douche as he does now.

 

 

 

if a man is rich or powerful or good looking enough to have multiple female partners then more power to him.

 

Alphamale, between this thread and the porn one I get the impression that you don't have that much respect for women. This isn't about a single man bedding women .this is about a man that was in a relationship for years, then married, that cheated on his partner multiple times. Put yourself in her shoes and come back again and tell me that you would shrug your shoulders so.

[bayouboi]

See that's the attutide I am talking about. "Lets leave David alone", as if he deserves that kind of respect and space in *his* time of need. Who cares about the little wife at home that stood by his side for years and bore his son.

 

I agree with you here. When I read that post I heard it in my mind in a Chris Crocker (google chris crocker britney spears for more info) voice. He doesn't deserve respect for any of this, he deserves shame. That isn't to say he couldn't be forgiven, but he should embrace the shame instead of making light of what he did. I agreed with an anchor I saw reporting on this that said it was his personal business to deal with, but instead of continuing to smile and go on with the show, he should have taken a week off to sort out his situation and show his wife a little respect.

[WineCountry]

if a man is rich or powerful or good looking enough to have multiple female partners then more power to him.

 

 

But then you men turn around and hate on those types of rich man chasing, gold digger types of women.

 

What's good for the goose..is good for the gander... and all that jazz.

[Island Girl]

See that's the attutide I am talking about. "Lets leave David alone", as if he deserves that kind of respect and space in *his* time of need. Who cares about the little wife at home that stood by his side for years and bore his son.

 

Where or when has ANYONE said that?

 

There's no excusing what he did. But he did do it. And now he has talked about it.

 

Do you Honestly think that bantering it about and having all of it publicly scrutinized helps his wife or his child?

 

And it isn't just the media - you are bringing it up as are many others right now all around the internet.

But your position is how thoughtful we should be about his wife and what she is going through. I do imagine it's terrible.

 

Considering your statement of how hard this has been and still must be for her I would think you'd be the first one to say, "the media and everyone else should let this story die away. Let them deal with it privately".

But you aren't.

 

Is it that you now have had a brand new call to arms about cheating men and their betrayed suffering spouses?

Because hammering this subject everywhere (including forums and internet gossip pages, etc.) is more than likely exactly what his wife doesn't want to happen anymore. Thinking of her and her best interests would translate to dropping the subject.

[alphamale]

Put yourself in her shoes and come back again and tell me that you would shrug your shoulders so.

if she wants fidelity she'll have better chances dating your regular joe

[mem11363]

JS,

I find the tone of this post to be "why are so many rich/powerful men disloyal/not monogamous?"

 

Before saying anything else I will say that I agree with you that lying/cheating on your partner is wrong and unfair.

 

It seems to me that you are wasting a lot of emotional energy getting wound up at these guys.

 

If I could follow 10 randomly selected beautiful American women around for a year - I imagine I could show you that in that particular pool you find just as much unappealing behavior as you do with the rich/powerful men. Disloyal, dishonest, selfish - huge sense of entitlement, etc.

 

I remember this really beautiful girl at college. My friend Scott asked her to go out on a date to a nice restuarant. They sit down, order and then the next words out of her mouth were: "my boyfriend ....".

 

She knew the whole time Scott had a thing for her. She also knew the humane thing to do when he asked her to dinner was to tell him she had a boyfriend. Use the golden rule here, a decent person would not conceal that from a blatantly interested male. I am not saying that beautiful = long list of bad traits any more then I would say that rich/powerful man = long list of bad traits.

 

Just saying that you can get angry and loosely bash men, or you can realize that when people have a lot of power of one type or another, they sure do struggle to control themselves.

 

 

if she wants fidelity she'll have better chances dating your regular joe

[Jersey Shortie]

And it isn't just the media - you are bringing it up as are many others right now all around the internet.

 

That's right, I posed it up for dicussion. I am not making ratings, money or profit off of it.

 

 

Considering your statement of how hard this has been and still must be for her I would think you'd be the first one to say, "the media and everyone else should let this story die away. Let them deal with it privately". But you aren't.

 

I could understand your point if I was making a profit off the situation or if I had been the one to breach the information. I thought some serious dicussion about relationships, socialism and the public could be in order. Discussion that *you* chimed in on previously and were intersted enough in discussing to open this thread and further, to post on it. You advice to letting the subject drop and the ills of the media but doesn't it also fallicatate the exact environment yuo claim you don't want by reading a thread, and then further commenting on it?

 

Secondly, you make the assumption that, while I am sure we can both agree that she is in a tough position once this information became so public, that it doesn't help her to see, in turn, public support for her. I am not going to claim that it 100% helps but I think it's a possiblity. I think we all have a desire to talk about our society on socialistic terms to figure out the great mystery of humanness.

 

 

Thinking of her and her best interests would translate to dropping the subject.

 

Islandgirl, would you have liked us to drop it before or after you made your own comments on the situation?

 

I am not going to claim that the media doesn't perpuate things that it shouldn't. However, it's very normal for dicussion to be open about human culrtural and socialism. Isn't it a little presumptious to make the distinct statement that only one solution would be in her personal best interest? In the face of the media exposure, who knows what would really help her. It could very well be public support of the actions of a failed husband. I am not claiming that is the case or not, but who knows.

[Jersey Shortie]

if she wants fidelity she'll have better chances dating your regular joe

 

So here is my question if that's what you reall ybelieve, do you think men's word, honesty and respect for women is only as good as their options are? If so, that says even more about...or rather less about men then it does about women.

 

I find the tone of this post to be "why are so many rich/powerful men disloyal/not monogamous?"

 

Actually, I suspect men of all economic classes cheat. My issue is not with rich powerful men. However, there has been so much media exposure of late of men humilating their families.

 

 

I remember this really beautiful girl at college. My friend Scott asked her to go out on a date to a nice restuarant. They sit down, order and then the next words out of her mouth were: "my boyfriend ....".

 

She knew the whole time Scott had a thing for her. She also knew the humane thing to do when he asked her to dinner was to tell him she had a boyfriend.

 

There is a discussion about this vary topic in another thread. I think it's great you want to discuss it. Please bring that up in there or start your own thread. This thread is for a different discussion. I really dislike responses that when faced with one issue, people feel the need to say "but, but but this is what happens to men". I am not belitting your friend Scott or the situation. However, it has nothing to do with what is being discussed here.

 

Just saying that you can get angry and loosely bash men, or you can realize that when people have a lot of power of one type or another, they sure do struggle to control themselves.

 

And you can try to defame me by saying am bashing men when there is no evidence of that in my post or you can logically discuss the issue without the standards "but women do this" excuse.

[stillafool]

I hear what you are saying OP but I am also tired of the public getting into everyone's personal business. I personally don't care. I just don't understand what these younger women see in these old guys. David Letterman certainly doesn't look like a stud to me. If these women are doing it because the guy is "loaded with money" they are no better than prostitutes.

[Jersey Shortie]

Yeah you care. Otherwise you wouldn't have read or commited or called these women names where you called Dave none.