Mad attraction to a girl from work. Is this mutual attraction or what is it?

[xlnc]

Hey there. Need help guys. Please read through this! Here's how it's been:

 

Me and this girl go a little back. We have seen each other in the past..in classes, in the gym. But we never talked to each other. It was always staring at each other and it was all pretty tense. Just serious staring. I was attracted to her the first time I saw her. But still never talked, this was about a year and half back.

 

3 months back, I started working and there she was again. For the first month we didn't talk to each other, we would always look at each other when passing by and smile. It was still pretty tense. That's when on the pretext of something she asked me for my number. From then on, I started flirting with her, pretty big time and she would do the same at times. Again, it was all very tense and you could actually feel it. The last month and half all we have done is taken care of each other. Message each other around 20-30 times a day asking what the other is doing, whereabouts etc. We would see each other daily at work and we would be in touch the entire day! Whenever she would cross my desk, we would look at each other, smile. We would even tell each other when we were gonna cross each other the next time. If I would be late for work by even 5 mins, she would ask if i've taken leave or something. All this EVERYDAY. And when we talk to each other there's this mad emotion, almost as if it's stifling. We prefer to message each other, almost as if wanting to avoid direct confrontation.

 

1 week into this is when I came to know that she was committed to someone. But all this still happened. We have asked each other to go out quite a few times..movie, shopping, gym, meeting up. It has happened a few times and we have both canceled on occasions as well. I have told her how I wish I'd met her long before so I could have asked her out and that it'd be a crime to not do so. Flirting still there, she would do :x with her messages and give 'hugs' in them. We've gotten mad at each other a few times. But still, same daily 20 messages. "What you doing", "Back from work" "Back from gym" etc. When she would leave work she would be like "I thought I'd inform you". Just a helluva lot of attention. I am definitely mad attracted to her.

 

A few days back I quit work, next morning she messaged saying she was thinking of me and it was sad. She asked me if I was free. I didn't feel like going. Next day I asked her if she was free, she was working though. And we messaged each other but we weren't too nice to each other. Since then it's been a day and I haven't messaged her back. It's only been like a day since I heard from her and I already have the mad emotions of missing her coming in. Since quitting work, we've tried to give the same attention to each other but it's almost become a little hostile. We are both passionate and moody, a lot of times our answers are blunt, like "Yes", "No" etc. We're always aware of the presence of each other when we're at the same place. Don't talk much about her relationship but she was depressed about it for 1 week and gets sad easily.

 

I want some perspective from you guys as to what this is. Mutual attraction, lusting or what? Is she attracted to me? I'm 20 btw.

Edited October 6, 2009 by xlnc

[xlnc]

I feel it now. I love her. And I let her free. May God give her the strength to take the right actions if she ever feels the same.

[Lusitan]

Do you want the Air Force to lend her their lights handlers, so she can create a road with lights all around it, into her vagina, for you?

 

 

She probably lost interest because you were too much of a chicken. But, at the very least, go to her and act like a man and less like a chicken . Sleep with her!

 

And stop with the "I lost the love of my life" crap. That's a great way for her to stop feel attracted to you, a woman doesn't like a whining man.

Edited October 11, 2009 by Lusitan

[skywriter]

A woman may not like a whining man but a woman does appreciate a man

who knows where he stands morally.

 

You may only be twenty, but you obviously have enough conviction about yourself to ask others for advice before getting yourself any further involved with someone who is already committed.

 

This is your opportunity to say look me up, when and if you aren't committed, because obviously you both have been doing this dance of mutual attraction around one another. You'll look so much more attractive to her for saying this.

 

What women don't want is wishy washy, fence sitting,cake eating men, that bounce back and forth on what they want, because they want it all as long as they can get it. This goes for women as well, so please don't let her do this to you anymore than she already has.

[tami-chan]

Yes, do something already. Tell her what you feel and that if she ever has the courage to leave her current "committed relationship" so you both can pursue this obvious mutual attraction, she knows where to get n touch with you...until then no more contact!

[xlnc]

I'm thinking about what all you have said..take all this into consideration as well.

 

I was tired of pursuing this game, it had drained me out enough so I was looking for opportunities to shift the charge of pursuing it on her. When I left work I said "keep in touch" and she said "whatever this was, it was always outside work" and the next day is when she asked if i was free so we could meet. Next day I asked her but even that couldn't materialize.

 

3 days back, as I wanted to shift the charge to her I told her "you've been ignoring me" although she wasn't really ignoring me or anything. It just didn't look that passionate. I thought I'd just back off after that and she'd pursue it..but 3 days and nothing. I have no clue what's going on and I'm sick of these games. Yesterday night is when I messaged her asking how things were going. Today I told her that she needs to tell me what the hell is going on and still nothing so far.

 

Is she playing hard to get or something so that she figures if I'm dead serious about this or what? If she wanted me out she would have told me. What on earth is going on? She's really testing my limits. I'll also tell you guys that people at work think of me as someone who fools around.

Edited October 12, 2009 by xlnc

[xlnc]

It's done..figured our boundaries. Thanks again

[fooled once]

Do people not TALK anymore??

 

All this messaging .... how old are you guys?

[NowhereToHide]

Do you want the Air Force to lend her their lights handlers, so she can create a road with lights all around it, into her vagina, for you?

 

She probably lost interest because you were too much of a chicken. But, at the very least, go to her and act like a man and less like a chicken . Sleep with her!

 

And stop with the "I lost the love of my life" crap. That's a great way for her to stop feel attracted to you, a woman doesn't like a whining man.

 

 

Oh, man... I literally laughed out loud when I read that. Great line.