TheMighty99 Posted October 3, 2009 Posted October 3, 2009 This is weird. Basically, i went out with a girl for nearly 2 years. We was madly in love at first, but then we drifted apart so she ended it. After a month after we broke up, i felt like i still loved her, so i asked her back. She said no at first. But then after awhile we decided we could give it another go. The next day she finished me....?? *sigh* Just leading me on the whole time! giving me false hope! grrr. So i decided on NC. It was really really tough at first, but 2 months have passed since i spoke to her or have seen her. I basically said to her, i don't wanna see or talk to you again. Then went NC. (For those who are currently going through NC, believe me it's doable!). I must admit, i'm a much happy person. I'm a more outgoing person and i'm hanging around with my friends more, which is just great. Today, i found out she was pregnant. Not mine of course. Some other random dude. But for some strange reason i feel upset. I have no idea why. I don't have her number anymore, but i was thinking of txtin her to see if shes ok. Good/bad idea?. I could probably get her number though. I work with her mother too (that's how i met her) but not at the same time. So i basically knew her mother way before i met her. And i have got her number. I was going to txt her to ask if she was ok. Good/bad idea? Isn't it a bit weird me txtin her though? She may have a b/f and may not approve. I'm not sure. I guess you could say i've still got feelings for her. But if i txt her, it won't be because i want her back, it wil just be a txt to see if she's ok. I would kind of love to know what she's up to and everything though too. So what do you think? Txt her? Txt her mother? Don't txt either? Oh and why the hell do i feel upset? Jeez. It's not like im pouring tears or anything, i feel a bit, ya know, *sigh* lmao. Cheers peeps.
Ronni_W Posted October 3, 2009 Posted October 3, 2009 My vote is "bad idea". Leave her be. Don't text her mom. Deal with your own feelings of upset without infringing on their lives. Could be that, at one time, you envisioned being the father of her child(ren), and this news has re-triggered those old dreams -- kind of, they used to be dead and buried (or so you thought?), but all of a sudden they've been resurrected through an event that was/is totally out of your control? Don't know, of course -- could be something like that, or something totally different. In any event, it doesn't seem "strange" to me that you might feel upset. Hope it passes soon enough, though. Hugs.
ashleigh422 Posted October 3, 2009 Posted October 3, 2009 I SECOND that vote of "BAD IDEA" You will only hurt yourself. Yes its okay to think about her.. you once loved her. You may still love or have feelings for her. You have to move on and try to forget this. SHe is not your problem and she will deal with it on her own. If she needed you, trust that she would call or txt you. DONT TXT HER OR HER MOM.
ATR Posted October 4, 2009 Posted October 4, 2009 Really, really bad idea. I would kind of love to know what she's up to and everything though too. Curiosity killed the cat.
ashleigh422 Posted October 4, 2009 Posted October 4, 2009 Really, really bad idea. Curiosity killed the cat. Curiosity definatley killed the cat...
Jordanjames Posted October 4, 2009 Posted October 4, 2009 I think the OP should run from this woman. I mean look at the situation she got pregnant from some other guy you should be glad it's not you! I mean seriously, now you can heal your heart, meet someone else, and move on with your life. I think this is a GREAT OPPORTUNITY for you to meet SOMEONE ELSE and BE HAPPY. This woman you love she has so much baggage. You can start off with a clean slate. I think you should move on.
Author TheMighty99 Posted October 4, 2009 Author Posted October 4, 2009 I have no intention of getting back together with her. Does she sound like trouble to you or something? that's why you're telling me to run?
sb129 Posted October 4, 2009 Posted October 4, 2009 If my ex texted me now to see if I was OK I would ignore him. And be a tiny bit creeped out that he had my number.
Exit Posted October 5, 2009 Posted October 5, 2009 What exactly about a girl who dumped you, and is now pregnant with someone else's kid, screams "TEXT HER" ?? Continue moving on as you have been.
WiseOne1 Posted October 5, 2009 Posted October 5, 2009 If she wanted to get back with you, would you take her back and raise her new kid also?
Author TheMighty99 Posted October 5, 2009 Author Posted October 5, 2009 No chance. I don't want her back. I was just wondering is it kinda weird to ask if she's ok?
DustySaltus Posted October 5, 2009 Posted October 5, 2009 What exactly about a girl who dumped you, and is now pregnant with someone else's kid, screams "TEXT HER" ?? Continue moving on as you have been. +1 There's absolutely NOTHING good that can come out of this. I admire your care for this woman but it's not healthy for you.
ATR Posted October 5, 2009 Posted October 5, 2009 What do you mean by that? Curiosity killed the cat is a phrase that means inquisitiveness (interested/curious about something) can lead one into dangerous situations. Ignorance is bliss:p, trust me.
ninjawarrior Posted October 5, 2009 Posted October 5, 2009 OK, I have some question about sex: I have sex with my girlfriend without the use of condoms, and I always am very very careful and I never came during the sex, but is there any chance for her to get pregnant (whitch I wouldn't want, of course) even though I am very careful?? Please help! Tnx
JaggedRoad Posted October 5, 2009 Posted October 5, 2009 I think pre cum can contain sperm, so yes, she can get pregnant.
JaggedRoad Posted October 5, 2009 Posted October 5, 2009 Um... I can't give you a realistic answer on that. If you're worried, go out and buy the morning after pill.
ninjawarrior Posted October 5, 2009 Posted October 5, 2009 I am a bit worried, but it's too late for that, I had sex 2 days ago.. I hope that the chances for pregnancy are very very small, I had condom free sex earlier and I never had problems, but I'm always a bit afraid..
JaggedRoad Posted October 5, 2009 Posted October 5, 2009 The morning after pill works if used within 3 days of the sexual encounter, but effectiveness declines after each day.
Author TheMighty99 Posted October 6, 2009 Author Posted October 6, 2009 (edited) Seriously guys, this is so god damn weird. I listened to what you guys said and i decided not to txt either of them. Yesterday i received a txt from her mum. Yeah, not my ex, her mum. Huh? lol. It basically said hi, how are you? I guess she knows that i know about my ex being pregnant and wondered if i was ok. I thought about whether to reply or not. But i thought it would be kind of ignorant not to. So i did.. I just said yes and asked how she was. Then, today i received a txt from my ex sayin 'hiya u ok it's chan' i guess she knew i txted her mum back. What do i do? do i reply or not? jeez this is so annoyin. After typin this, i now realise i shouldn't have txted her mum back. right/wrong? Edited October 6, 2009 by TheMighty99
ninjawarrior Posted October 6, 2009 Posted October 6, 2009 Ok, my gf took a pill 64 hours after sex, so will it be effective?I hope it will...
Chrome Barracuda Posted October 6, 2009 Posted October 6, 2009 Seriously guys, this is so god damn weird. I listened to what you guys said and i decided not to txt either of them. Yesterday i received a txt from her mum. Yeah, not my ex, her mum. Huh? lol. It basically said hi, how are you? I guess she knows that i know about my ex being pregnant and wondered if i was ok. I thought about whether to reply or not. But i thought it would be kind of ignorant not to. So i did.. I just said yes and asked how she was. Then, today i received a txt from my ex sayin 'hiya u ok it's chan' i guess she knew i txted her mum back. What do i do? do i reply or not? jeez this is so annoyin. After typin this, i now realise i shouldn't have txted her mum back. right/wrong? Nope you should have left it alone she's fishing buddy, OG is probably not gonna be a good dad and they are hedgi their bets by keeping you on the hook. I understand you still got lingering feelings but you need to forget about them and forge ahead. She's pregnant with another guys kid. it's not your problem as much wishful thinking as it may be to have. It's not the reality of the situation.
countingufosagain Posted October 7, 2009 Posted October 7, 2009 I was with my ex for 5 years and she has been texting me asking financial questions for the last 3 weeks. The first week I answered her questions and had to eventually end the communication. Week 2: she asks the same questions and I advise her to go to her HR Department as I couldn't help her get through the rest of the process. She informs me that she has reconciled with her daughters father or her ex husband from 8 years ago. The guy that I was helping take care of his daughter because he was supposedly financially unable but could afford to go out all the time and enter poker tournaments (yes, I'm a little bitter). I told her that if things were going to work out for her and the ex, she needs to stop contacting me. Week 3: (Today) Again I get the financial line of questioning. I again tell her that i'm not able to assist any further and that only her HR person can help and leave it at that. She sends another text that i chose to ignore and then sends another saying "so you're really not going to talk to me?". I told her that last weeks conversation really closed the chapter of my life that included her. she then says she has something to tell me and wants me to hear it from her mouth and the bomb falls "i'm pregnant". Anger sets into my core. I asked her why she was telling me and she says that, get this, "you're my bestfriend and can't talk to anyone else about it". She hasn't told her family or friends but feels comfortable telling me? i don't get it. I blew up, i just couldn't take this new reality. I just can't believe that she would go back to this 34 year old loser that still lives with mom and didn't provide 1 cent of support for his first child. I told her that I would no longer have contact with her via any media and if I was her bestfriend she shouldn't want to hurt me by doing so. she agreed and text me 5 minutes later stating " she wants me to find happiness because she knows that she didn't give it to me. Where the hell did this come from? Needless to say, I hadn't gotten over her and this has been devastating. I can at least go on knowing that this part of my life is over. the finality will help me let go of that last bit of emotional attachment or drive me crazy, who knows. I probably should have started my own thread but figured that if i read yours it would save sometime. I wish i was in your position and had basically been over the relationship when it happened. I would suggest that you not continue to text as it may uncover some things you didn't know were there.
WiseOne1 Posted October 7, 2009 Posted October 7, 2009 You should cut her off completly! Most likely the other guy is already showing signs of being a DEAD BEAT DAD. He's most likely already moving away from her emotionally and shes freaking out, "stuff like this happens", don't even give her any of your attention.
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