Glue woman

[lostforwords]

lmao!!!!!!! cool ill check out that simpson site..... hows da chinese food? (drooling...) I went down to Sushi Misho picked up some lunch... mmm wasabe!!! mmmmmm lol

[Caddy]

I keep thinking I could make some lovely tea with my lasers from the future.

Campbells ain't got nothing on me then! LOL

 

 

I still think he needs to join a dating service and maybe a reality service too. LOL.

 

But I still like you in that oh so comical make me wanna shoot chocolate milk out of my nose way Dave

[jenny]

 

reality service! ! i wonder if they would deliver!

 

 

very very pleasing.

[lostforwords]

plus, i just like the idea of "tea-bag seduction" (dave, 03) as a secret ninja move. i can't stop thinking about jackie chan pulling 'em out to punch out a nefarious female spy.

 

lmao!!!!!! i can see that too!!! roflmfao teabag seduction!!!! i picture all of the tetley tea men with their jingling shoes coming to his aid but scaring off the girl due to their shoes jingling louder and louder and louder.....

[Caddy]

Originally posted by jenny

 

reality service! ! i wonder if they would deliver!

 

 

There's a $10.00 minimum. And I'm the driver, so you better give good tips!!!

[jenny]

man, i'm losing track of my euphemisms! are shoes and bells also slang for testicles? or am i just a pervert?

 

either way is good with me

[lostforwords]

Mouth drops open

 

ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jenny... if testicles rang like bells..... sex would be a very NOISY . er wait.... nvm.... i take that back..... LOL

 

Can hear the sound of what appears to sound like Santa sliding down the stairs on his a$$, with a loud jingle everytime his butt hits the step......

[Caddy]

LMAO! yeah it's jingle bells not balls - I know what to get Jenny for christmas, a big wreath made out of bells.

 

Oh the two of you! LOLOLOLOL Just what I needed!

 

I keep thinking about Earl Grey and his mighty teabag of love. LOL

[lostforwords]

I keep thinking about Earl Grey and his mighty teabag of love. LOL

 

Earl Grey damn well better look like The Rock.... or i aint drinking tea from his bag of love ever again!!!!! LMAO!!!!!!!!!

[Caddy]

Originally posted by lostforwords

lmao!!!!!!! cool ill check out that simpson site..... hows da chinese food? (drooling...) I went down to Sushi Misho picked up some lunch... mmm wasabe!!! mmmmmm lol

 

 

OOOO I love sushi, but that's japanese, LOL...

I got some Egg Rolls, BBQ Pork Fried Rice and Egg Drop Soup.

Come on over and have some!

[Caddy]

Originally posted by lostforwords

Earl Grey damn well better look like The Rock.... or i aint drinking tea from his bag of love ever again!!!!! LMAO!!!!!!!!!

 

If Earl Grey looks like the Rock, then I am going to start buying cases of his tea!!!

[lostforwords]

EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW Eggdrop soup is grossssssssss!!!!!! Man I ordered that once.,.. and I will never have it again.... hell I never ate it when i ordered it i threw it in the garbage... as far as Earl Grey looking like the mighty fine Dwayne Johnson..... he does in my head....... lmao

[meanon]

You can't treat women like that..You think you can buy her glue and you'll get laid

 

Well maybe not but methinks it is not beyond the yonder realms of fancying that yon man Dave could afix his attentions with said glue on many a young wench who happens upon his splendififerous posey prose.

[clatan]

Originally posted by Guidette82

I say if you want "SEX" so bad go find a hooker. You can't treat women like that..You think you can buy her glue and you'll get laid?? THINK AGAIN. Maybe try using some manners and politely introducing yourself to her....MEN!!!

 

Yeah I agree. Buy her glue to have sex with her? Come on! It'll take a lot more. You better make sure you drive a fairly nice, new expensive car. Buy her a diamond ring, take her to a fancy restaurant. Most women will get on thier backs for that.

[Dave1234]

well it has been made known to me by the gudence-counsellor that my questions are of a normal-nature and to this i will tell you love-shackers that this is normal of a male in a saexual nature of a love-creation]]][well for those of you who have suggested that i dave need medication to this i will tell you that the bully-boys at summer camp have rubbed sand on my bottom at a young-age and to continue i will tell you that they told me that we could walk in the sand and make sandcastles and drag me bare-bum through the currents ///////////well to this i will tell you it makes me sick!!!!!!!!!!! what is it for a man-to man-love??????????????????this is abomidable! a dick-lay for a woman is nature-bound and healty>>>>>>>>>> have any love-sharkers heard of the pleasure-swing?????????/ this device is used in order to lick to a climax well there are all sorts of fancy manners for to love a female and maybe get a little bit of a hand-job????? u know what my roommate uses to masuturbate!!!!!!! he used 1/4 pound of chicken liver which he lets sit till it gets stinky then he puts it in the sleeve-coat of the ball and chain love female and he does the deed which is self-pleasure

[jenny]

among wild chatter of simpsons, kung-fu, testicles and other delicacies, and "splendififerous wenches," in a totally disembodied, ergo certainly NOT mercenary, arena...

 

and clatan still waxes acridly! man, that's resilient bitterness 2.0.

 

but i have decided it's kinda cute. i propose to hereby fetishize clatan's brooding until he at least chortles a little bit about what adorable heinous monstruous bitches we must be. :D

 

baby, you're among friends. i know many women like the ones who have mistreated you; but they are generally not the same sort of women who spend their evenings geeking out and trying to help people.

 

i think you feel about women the way many women feel about men-only-after-snatch; and it doesn't have to be that way - especially not here.

 

don't get me wrong - i really like how shocking your posts are to most - it's a *very* welcome change of pace - but feel free to expose other sides of your personality as well.

 

cheers,

j

 

 

p.s. just catching up on dave's best new post - here is my Clue guess as to whodunwhat to whom:

 

the abdomiable sand boy, in the pleasure swing, with the sleeve-coat liverpussy to himself.

 

dave: what happened to marta? the pigs? there was so much potential...any chance you'll be making er..tea with the ol' roommate? i want to start a pool.

[lostforwords]

. You better make sure you drive a fairly nice, new expensive car. Buy her a diamond ring, take her to a fancy restaurant. Most women will get on thier backs for that.

Awww clatan... unfortunately your wrong with this thinking.... absolutely wrong.... and if you continue to think like this you wont be getting any dates..... sorry dude but its your attitude.... absolutely nothing wrong with your looks... attitude stinks!!

 

DAVE!!!!! DOOD!!! always a pleasure hearing your insightful, humorous woes of a sexual nature!! k i have one question............

 

u know what my roommate uses to masuturbate!!!!!!! he used 1/4 pound of chicken liver

 

a 1/4 pound of a chicken liver??????? thats one big huge chicken...... was the chicken an alcoholic? that would explain why his liver enlarged that huge in order for your roommate to pleasure it....... lmao

 

p.s. just catching up on dave's best new post - here is my Clue guess as to whodunwhat to whom:

 

the abdomiable sand boy, in the pleasure swing, with the sleeve-coat liverpussy to himself.

 

dave: what happened to marta? the pigs? there was so much potential...any chance you'll be making er..tea with the ol' roommate? i want to start a pool

 

ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yeh what did happen to marta? was she the roomate and the chickenliver? why dont you guys just buy marta glue and ask her ?.....

[Vivid_29]

Originally posted by Dave1234

well it has been made known to me by the gudence-counsellor that my questions are of a normal-nature and to this i will tell you love-shackers that this is normal of a male in a saexual nature of a love-creation]]][well for those of you who have suggested that i dave need medication to this i will tell you that the bully-boys at summer camp have rubbed sand on my bottom at a young-age and to continue i will tell you that they told me that we could walk in the sand and make sandcastles and drag me bare-bum through the currents ///////////well to this i will tell you it makes me sick!!!!!!!!!!! what is it for a man-to man-love??????????????????this is abomidable! a dick-lay for a woman is nature-bound and healty>>>>>>>>>> have any love-sharkers heard of the pleasure-swing?????????/ this device is used in order to lick to a climax well there are all sorts of fancy manners for to love a female and maybe get a little bit of a hand-job????? u know what my roommate uses to masuturbate!!!!!!! he used 1/4 pound of chicken liver which he lets sit till it gets stinky then he puts it in the sleeve-coat of the ball and chain love female and he does the deed which is self-pleasure

 

Rubbing sand all over your A$$? Drag your barebum through the currents? Come on, Dave...

 

I listen the Jerky Boys too!!!

 

Viv

[lostforwords]

Rubbing sand all over your A$$? Drag your barebum through the currents? Come on, Dave...

 

I listen the Jerky Boys too!!!

 

 

awwwwwwwwww my image of dave is slowly tainting.....

[BlockHead]

Dave1234

Why settle for laser beams?

 

If Howard Stern likes them, they must be good.

 

Dave1234

…how can i get a girlfriend to have sex with??????????????????????

I heard those same words come from a guy I know. He has psychological problems, and he has the tendency to roughhouse women.

You should put more thought when courting women, and you might want to be a little more considerate toward their feelings. Creepiness is something women factor in. And try to work on your technique.

 

Dave1234

...i saw a beautiful female at the home-depot and she was buying glue and so i go to snatch the glue from her and I says I Dave will pay for it my yon woman!

Next time try one of these

1. Pound on your chest and growl like King Kong.

2. Do a few somersaults.

3. Profess your undying love.

[Dave1234]

well you can all just go and jump in the lake all of you love-shackers and i dave will be in the bathtub with a nice tall glass of mikl and csome cookies

[jenny]

 

 

well, despite his homophobia, i'm back in the dave's fan club.

 

this is the best revenge tactic i have ever heard of:

 

(get) in the bathtub with a nice tall glass of mikl and csome cookies

 

that'll show us!

 

 

that cheered me up considerably, dave, thanks

[cindy0039]

Originally posted by Dave1234

well you can all just go and jump in the lake all of you love-shackers and i dave will be in the bathtub with a nice tall glass of mikl and csome cookies

What kind of cookies, Dave?

[lostforwords]

mmmmmm cookies.......

[Caddy]

Oh yeah? Well I'm going to sit on a cheesecake just to spite you and your cookies Dave!