Addison Posted November 28, 2003 Share Posted November 28, 2003 Ok, so yesterday was the first major holiday that has occured since my ex and I broke up. I was dreading it because in the days prior to it I was concerned about how I was going to feel knowing that he had his new girlfriend with his family. But I told myself not to think about it and to just focus on being with this new guy that I've been dating and my own family. So the day was going pretty good. I had thought about him when I woke up that morning because I always do, but I had quickly replaced those thoughts with worries about being with all my family under the same roof for hours. So we ate, we laughed, my new guy came over for a while and we had a great time. Then out of the blue, I recieve a text message. I figured it was my roommate from college just saying happy thanksgiving so I read it while I was sitting in the living room with everyone. But it wasn't my friend at all, it was my ex's new girlfriend. She sent me a msg from his phone saying, "Me and Steve wish you a Happy Thanksgiving, Love Maggie." I felt like someone has punched me and knocked all the air out. I must have turned white or something because my dad asked me if everything was ok. I just nodded and fighting back tears, ran to the other room before my new guy could see how upset I had become. I just stared at the message for a minute, wondering why he had to be so harsh. I mean, he knows I still love him and he has been kinda mean lately, but to do this on Thanksgiving when he knows how vulnerable I would be... it just hurt so bad. I wanted to send a rude message back or call and tell her what I really thought, but I didn't figure creating a scene on the holiday was such a good idea. Plus, even though he knows me well enough to know how upset it made me, I didn't want to give him the absolute satisfaction of knowing that it did. So I just simply replied "Thank you." Hoping that either it would infuriate them to know that I can be the bigger person or to let him know that it didn't really matter. My friends have been telling me that I should have said something mean or that I should confront her about her rudeness. But I just want to let it go. I feel like he wants to pretend we are in middle school and play these juvenile games. Believe me, I would like to be mean and tell her and him what I think about it all, but I know thats probably not the best way to go. Its just easier to pretend it doesn't bother me I guess. Anyways, I was just wondering what everyone else thought I should have said back. Its just one of those things where you want to kick yourself because you're like, "Man! I should have said..." Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted November 28, 2003 Share Posted November 28, 2003 i think you did great! there's no point in these silly things. by saying a simple "thank you", you make it no fun to bother you - good for you! good luck, -yes Link to post Share on other sites
Neo Posted November 28, 2003 Share Posted November 28, 2003 You did the best possible thing you could have. "Thank you" is probably the most perfect response to that situation. Link to post Share on other sites
GIZMO Posted November 28, 2003 Share Posted November 28, 2003 I agree, I think you did a great job! I know that must have been hard.. Trust me... I am dealing with some of the same stuff with my ex.. Just read my post, I beg you please help me... I think I will do just as you did.. Just try and be calm and not give them bastards the satisfaction of knowing how badly they hurt us.. You did a great job! Pat yourself on the back!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Vivid_29 Posted November 29, 2003 Share Posted November 29, 2003 Addison - Sometimes, we all have to hide behind a smile and there is nothing wrong with it. What he and his girlfriend did was very immature. Sounded like they wanted to get a rise out of you and your response to them is the classic example of killing them with kindness. Outstanding!!! Hats off to you!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Cass33 Posted November 29, 2003 Share Posted November 29, 2003 i agree too with everyone! that must have been the best and wisest thing you could do! You did make your self the bigger person, you didnt stoop to thier level! what they did was totaly immature and good for you to treat it the way you did! Good job agian! Link to post Share on other sites
mfrmboy Posted November 29, 2003 Share Posted November 29, 2003 That was the best way to handle it and I know you really want to call him/her up and give them a piece of your mind. But not letting them know it gets to you is the best. Plus it makes him think you've moved on. Lot's of luck !! Link to post Share on other sites
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