anne1 Posted September 29, 2009 Posted September 29, 2009 What does it mean to go NC. I get it that i can't contact him and if i do i am a stalker and lose self respect. But I have been told that if he contacts me i have to ignore him. So i am longing to hear his voice or to hear from him full stop and when he does i have to ignore him is this cos I have to convince myself that it is completely over cos I will never allow contact and move on or to get him at his own game. I know i am an idiot but i want him to contact me, I want him despite the fact he is a pig. How can i ignore him if he contacts me and if i do ignore him and then he says what i want to hear then what do i still ignore is it a game or is it really healing? I think i might curl up in a ball and die if i thought he would never contact me again..............I know this will change as i get used to him not being around but right now me ignoring him is not in my mind at all............I am new to this and just want to know what to do...................I cant heal without it being completely over in my mind and if i am hoping he is gonna contact it isn't over........................If i think he might never contact i would be in the depths of hell and i dont know if i could pick myself up............... I am in the halfway house of living in hope of his contact but starting to heal and getting used to not being with him and then when i accept its over I will at least be standing a bit steadier What is the answer
hrtbrk hotel tenant Posted September 29, 2009 Posted September 29, 2009 NC means no contact period im tryin myself i have failed a few times short of stalking her but really u have to heal urself right now it is not about the other person....if u want him/her back u have to start anew be a better person for urself by urself on down the line if God willin then u shall have him/her back but right now do u and yeah i wouldnt say iggin ur other but keep it brief if u can handle it if not then ignore the contact til ur strong enuf.
ecm Posted September 30, 2009 Posted September 30, 2009 Hey anne. I just saw that you asked on the other post if no contact means you have to ignore him. Not sure. I think it means you can't initiate contact. Find a profile for "Caliguy"...he has a "guide to no contact". good stuff. He will contact you, eventually.
Notsogood Posted September 30, 2009 Posted September 30, 2009 From my experience, which may be contrary to most people on this forum, is to just do what you feel you need to do. If you feel like you need to call him, then call him. If he calls you and you feel like you need to answer, then do it. I think this is the fastest way to get over someone. When I was fresh from my breakup and reading all the stories on this board and hearing advice from my friends, no matter how many times I heard it or even that I knew that NC was for the better, I would still break NC. In the end, the result will be the same. Things will work out for you, or (like me) you will eventually realise that contact = pain and NC is your only option to stop the pain. Human beings adapt to all situations and eventually when the pain is too much you will let go.
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