Hkizzle Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 Many people fall in love with the idea of falling in love, rather than taking the other person for who they really are, and loving that person. Over romanticized thinking will ruin your romantic life. Hell I know, one of my female friends with problems has "ever lasting love" as her MSN status.
Author Hkizzle Posted September 27, 2009 Author Posted September 27, 2009 I find it interesting this is the only thread I've started where everyone is speechless. I mean, did I speak some sort of truth that shocked everyone to the core?
carhill Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 The no1 reason for people's insecurities Inadequate seminal flow I gave up growing wildflowers years ago. No illusions here.
Jaytb Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 I find it interesting this is the only thread I've started where everyone is speechless. I mean, did I speak some sort of truth that shocked everyone to the core? No. We're just busy. Wait a sec, I thought you're in Hong Kong. Isn't it 4:03 AM in HK now?
Sam Spade Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 Not only people fall in love with the idea of being in love, but they also do so to the detriment of way more important things such as mutual respect and accountability.
Meaplus3 Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 Many people fall in love with the idea of falling in love, rather than taking the other person for who they really are, and loving that person. Over romanticized thinking will ruin your romantic life. Hell I know, one of my female friends with problems has "ever lasting love" as her MSN status. Well I think for those who fall in love with the idea of beign in love, they are only setting themselves up for heartbreak. A close male friend told me one time and it really stuck with me. "Love is a choice we make each day". IMO, that's very true. So, if one is just head over heals with the idea where will it get them when the fantasy of begin in love has lifted and the cold hard facts of everyday life set in? Just my thoughts. Mea:)
Trialbyfire Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 The #1 reason for people's insecurities, is that they're feeling insecure about themselves. End of story.
loveslife Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 The #1 reason for people's insecurities, is that they're feeling insecure about themselves. End of story. Shhhh he's probably just trying to be controversial again.
Bejita463 Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 The #1 reason for people's insecurities, is that they're feeling insecure about themselves. End of story. No. Clearly the #1 reason for insecurities is that those who are insecure have identified a problem which is hideous as it is socially crippling. A problem that no one will tell the truth about or acknowledge, choosing instead to attempt to reassure the person that said issue does not really exist or matter. It is not unpossible these do-gooders are telling the truth (of course), and their misplaced pity only serves to validate the individual's fear(s), and to worsen them. After all, everyone knows that the harder people try to make you feel good about a life altering deformity, the worse it must truly be.
ebab83 Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 I think a lot of people get confused about the first feelings of infatuation when someone new comes along. For instance, wanting to hear from them, looking forward to seeing them, people misjudge this completely for love. I also know people who fall for someone on the basis that said other person likes them. For me, i think you know it's love only really and truly when the bad times come, the flaws are there and you still wouldn't change them for the world.
anne1707 Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 The #1 reason for people's insecurities, is that they're feeling insecure about themselves. End of story. Isn't that the same as saying blue is blue because it's blue?
carhill Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 I can see now that opium poppies would've been a better crop I think a lot of people get confused about the first feelings of infatuation when someone new comes along. For instance, wanting to hear from them, looking forward to seeing them, people misjudge this completely for love. What if same happens, mutually, over half one's lifetime? What if that never goes away, ever? Interesting....
ebab83 Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 I should have been more specific...I mean once first meeting someone, you can't use these feelings alone for the basis of saying you are in love. Doesn't there need to be more?
carhill Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 The initial feelings are an impetus to the formation of other bonds, based on other dynamics, including intimacy. I've never had children. If you have, do you have a sense of them when they're not around? Like part of you is missing? You still 'feel' them? One could opine that's an infatuation built into a life-long love by intimacy, bonding, and sharing. Of course, it's not sexual, but powerful, nonetheless. OK, OP, my number one reason for people's insecurities is.....drum roll....fear
alphamale Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 people should base their relationships more upon practical/objective matters than subjective matters such as romance and love
Thaddeus Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 A few reasons for insecurity: It's already been mentioned, but fear is probably the biggie. Next in line comes from child-centric families and telling the child that they're "special" and everything they do is wonderful and how they can do anything they set their mind to and all the rest of the nonsense. Then they find themselves in this hyper-competitive world and realize that they're just another Jane or Joe Schmo, they realize that no, they aren't special and no, the world is not their oyster and no, not everything they do will get a gold star. Lastly, there's the media portrayal of people and relationships (especially romantic movies) that sets up absurd expectations. The fashion industry is famous for this. Ultra-skinny runway models and airbrushed magazine girls (strangely enough, a stereotype created by women, not men), the Clint Eastwood or Russel Crowe-type "man's man"; who in the real world can possibly compete with that?
Trialbyfire Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 In this world of everything's #1, other #1 reasons for insecurities are perfectionism and competitiveness. Edit - hang on, this rolls right back into my first #1 reason and that's insecurity of individual.
Jersey Shortie Posted September 28, 2009 Posted September 28, 2009 OK, OP, my number one reason for people's insecurities is.....drum roll....fear Every once inawhile Carhill really nails it. Lastly, there's the media portrayal of people and relationships (especially romantic movies) that sets up absurd expectations. The fashion industry is famous for this. Ultra-skinny runway models and airbrushed magazine girls (strangely enough, a stereotype created by women, not men), the Clint Eastwood or Russel Crowe-type "man's man"; who in the real world can possibly compete with that? While I agree with the things you mentioned, You're not completely honest or fair in your assesment and have decided to pick and choose your examples that best follow your own personal agenda.
Author Hkizzle Posted September 28, 2009 Author Posted September 28, 2009 No. We're just busy. Wait a sec, I thought you're in Hong Kong. Isn't it 4:03 AM in HK now? Haha, yeah it was 4am when I went to bed. I took a nap after I went to the gym in the afternoon and couldn't get back to sleep.
Author Hkizzle Posted September 28, 2009 Author Posted September 28, 2009 In this world of everything's #1, other #1 reasons for insecurities are perfectionism and competitiveness. Edit - hang on, this rolls right back into my first #1 reason and that's insecurity of individual. I disagree. Competitiveness coming from the wrong place might turn into an insecurity, but competitiveness is what drives humans to better themselves.
bac Posted September 28, 2009 Posted September 28, 2009 I believe that confidence/or insecurities is a genetic quality which has nothing to do with any real qualities. In other words, any person is born with some genetic qualities such as, for example, blue eyes, certain height, dark hair, certain talents and a certain level of confidence. I quess the confidence depends on some balance of neurotransmitters in human brain. When you look around at people at some deeper level, you can see that the most beautiful women are often the most insecure about their appearance. They do not eat enough, they can not find the right man, they do plastic procedures and other stuff. As for a men, the most confident man I have ever seen for the last several months, had a super severe erectile disfunction. But, a guy, who was the most wonderful at sex I have ever seen, had social anxiety and was very shy.
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