EmptyPromises Posted September 26, 2009 Posted September 26, 2009 its a friday night and i cant go out because i need to be up early. all i keep thinking about is what hes up to right now. i know hes at this huge keg party, probably having a blast, probably flirting with girls and its killing me. why is he not hurt about all this? how is he having fun?
hopefulInFuture Posted September 26, 2009 Posted September 26, 2009 I have a theory... people that don't feel any hurt from losing someone they were in a good relationship with are usually selfish, insensitive and superficial. Would you want to be with someone like that? Do you want to be with someone who's not thinking of you and doesn't miss you? I hope not. On the other hand, there are people who are like us. Who're sensitive and profound and who hurt because of this just as much as you do. If he's like this, even if he's out there partying it does not mean anything. Maybe, he's doing all this just to get out, just to not think and forget because these thoughts are haunting him the same way they're haunting you. I have not read your story, sorry I can't go into detail. But the point I wanted to make is that don't assume that the other person is having a blast of his life. It might be far off from the truth. Some people are just too good at not showing their emotions, pretending that things are going great. Some people are strong enough to close their sorrow into the socket and then do everything it takes not to think about this stuff. I have a colleague, he lost his beloved whife. She was depressed and she killed herself and he found her hung in the house. You can understand how much of shock this could have been to him. We urged him to start going out and doing things. He took up several evening lessons of musical instruments, went away all the weekends, went for an around world adventure... You think about this and say oh my god, he's having so much fun!!! I envy him... The thing is that he did all of this in order not to think... Deep inside he was hurting as hell. Not thinking helps a lot with the hurt. Even when you're home, try your own ways for not thinking about him. It's only gonna do you more harm.
UrKillinMeSmalls Posted September 26, 2009 Posted September 26, 2009 He is not hurt because he knows you're miserable. He knows you are right where he left you and he will come back if/when ever he pleases. You have given him that position. As long as you are ****ed up over this, he will continue to explore the anatomy of other girls, so to speak, without a care in the world. If this hurts, it's because it's true. I'm sorry for your pain, but it is what it is. FORGET ABOUT HIM.
Taucher Posted September 26, 2009 Posted September 26, 2009 EmptyPromises, I know exactly what you mean here. Saturday and Friday nights are hard because I always think about what she is up to. In my head I imagine her having a great time and flirting. But then I remember, I go out on Fridays and Saturday nights and I flirt with girls and anyone looking at me would think I was having a great time. But I still love my ex and would do anything to be with her. So it's not a true picture. You cant know what they are doing and if you DO find out what they are doing, even then you dont know how they are feeling. I find I think less about what she is up to if I am out somewhere myself. It's the Saturday nights in that really make my mind race.
Recommended Posts