shadowplay Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 And Shadow, in my experience, most men grow out of it - especially when they meet someone with whom they truly click. Haha, I'm glad you can relate to what I'm describing. I agree with you that it's often a young guy thing. In my observation, the men who fall most often for manic pixie dream girls are those with somewhat low self esteem who are looking for a larger than life mate to fill out/consume their identity. The girls represents what they want to be if they were more confident. Sometimes it's also guys with a huge ego who are shopping for a trophy that other people will admire. I totally agree that it doesn't last once the fantasy wears off.
Author bac Posted September 27, 2009 Author Posted September 27, 2009 Thank you. Now I have a better idea of how men fall in love. They fall in love differently because they have an inborn right to choose females. Choosing from options makes falling in love a rational thing like shopping. So, they probably have a detailed idea of a girl for falling in love with. Perhaps, they do not have a clear idea, but instead of that, they have an unconscious idea which guides them unconsciously. I guess they have the only model of a woman who they love which is their mother. So they equal love as an emotional connection like they have with their mother. In addition, they look for chemistry and intellectual/social compatability. They have a clear rational idea of what qualities they are looking for. Then the most enjoyable part starts which is the shopping itself. As a female, I can relate to pleasures of shopping completely. Finally, they will find a girl that fits the description in their brains. They will spend some time to make sure that the girl is the right one. Now, I feel so so so excited, because at this point men fall in love inevitably.
SoulSearch_CO Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 I am sorry, not trying to be a troll, but your post shows that you do not know what men are thinking, and you might benefit by hearing from a man. Interesting, then, that boogieBOY (whom I would assume is male) said something very similar to what I had already said. Guess I'm not a complete retard. But thanks. Yeah but your projecting your womans idea of falling in love where you want it, thinking men should fall in love the same way you do. Its not like that. Men are analytical and rational, while women are emotional first. Guys arent irrational or let unconcious feelings jump in too often. Guys rationally put the idea together of what he likes about a woman and sometimes he falls in love with her. Actually its mostly infatuation first. Sometimes it just happens, but guys to do think about it first. I know I dont like for it to happen before i think about it. So if youre wondering about why a guy you liked didnt fall in love with YOU in particular, its because there was someone out there he liked better, and he had options.
Kamille Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 They fall in love differently because they have an inborn right to choose females. Well women also have the right to choose. Women are far from powerless here. That's been my point all along. I choose who I fall in love with. I make sure he isn't going to squabble my time and love away. I might make mistakes, but I don't give away my heart before first having an idea that the guy is into me - and will respect me. Bac, what is this thread about really? I can't help but feel you're feeling powerless. You're not. You're not powerless. You're not a slave to sex or to a man who isn't in love with you. Or rather, you're choosing to waste your time on a man who isn't in love with you. Great sex? Every partner I've had is better then the last. What's the deal here? Why are you hanging on to someone who is making you approach men and love in such a negative way?
gypsy_nicky Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 Hi shadowplay, your post regarding the pixie woman is very enlightening. I have actually met a few of them and have fallen in love with some. What becomes of them of though, if, for men they only seem like a 'stepping stone' before we men find the right one? Who do they settle with?
Pyro Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 I can only speak for myself but it's a very good feeling.....with the right person of course.
Isolde Posted September 28, 2009 Posted September 28, 2009 I understand about the manic pixie thing, but it's really only an extreme way of saying that men like busy women with their own lives. There's no need for fancy terminology, to decorate a simple truth. Actually, some insecure guys don't like busy women--they want someone even needier than them. Anyway, the fact that men like women with lives of their own, doesn't mean that being emotionally unavailable is going to attract, whom you want to attract. For that matter, faux warmth or faux humility, can easily be detected by good guys -- the kind of guys that want to share their lives, not hand them over to a woman's whims.
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