Soul-Searcher Posted September 30, 2009 Posted September 30, 2009 It's starting to get to the point now, where LS is not being good for me. I have seen so much b*tching/fighting lately and I've noticed that certain posters are getting away with murder and it angers me, while others who are less deserving of backlash, get infractions over the most stupidest things. LS is about asking for help with problems and giving help to others who need it. LS is like a tight knit community...like family. I have so many friends here who I care about and would do anything for and it's because of them I tend to stick around here, but there are some posters who give me extremely high blood pressure and anger me so much. It's ok for them to attack others but they can't take the heat themselves. I can't stand being around people like that. If you can learn to dish it, then learn to take it as well!
EmperorR Posted October 1, 2009 Posted October 1, 2009 ive mvoed on a long time ago, i just post to help people, like hey ive been in your shoes I know how it feels and you can get through this. Its not holding me back or anything.
adamt Posted October 1, 2009 Posted October 1, 2009 I feel i am moving on but after all the advice i got and read on here in the last for months i want to return the advice to people who are just starting after a break up. I dont look as much as i did initially but maybe once i get someone else i will post a lot less. but i hope i can pop in once every so often to help people with advice. Reading forums like this has made a massive difference to help me move on in 4 months.
bayouboi Posted October 1, 2009 Posted October 1, 2009 I find these forums a pretty valuable resource for getting insight into a myriad of topics. I've found that as I experience certain things in my life, my eyes wander into certain forum sections moreso than others. For example, I came here last year to the Second Chances forums to see what I was up against after my wife suddenly left me. Once I realized things looked pretty grim I found myself in the Coping section. Divorce section was soon to follow once I discovered she had been cheating on me. Eventually I migrated to the Dating section once I got back into the swing of things. Occasionally I'd check on the Cheating forums out of curiosity for what goes through the minds of cheaters to try and harvest insight into what happened to me in order to learn from my mistakes. The topic of marriage has come up between my current girlfriend and me, so every once in a while I'll check into the Marriage section to see how miserable everyone is and remind myself why I shouldn't do it.
Beeotch Posted October 1, 2009 Posted October 1, 2009 From my experience...no I don't think it really gives you a place to wallow in your pain. People here grow quickly tired of those rehashing the same thing over and over and most are not going to hold your hand and say it's okay....an up and downside of the forum. I feel that your progress and how you feel offline is reflected on the forums and not so much that the forum is the one that manipulates or controls your moving on or feelings. From what I see...there is more positive advice and helpful hints, tips and just a therapeutic nature of seeing you're not alone moreso than a pity party where everyone is crying and bashing their ex. Especially since not everyone is currently broken up and we are ALL at different stages. Some people are newly broken up so more emotional than others, some are on the journey to recovery and some are over their ex, in new relationships but hang around. So you get lots of helpful feedback and viewpoints and everyone is more or less rooting for you to move forward and be happy again versus encouraging you to act foolishly or feel bad for yourself.
Beeotch Posted October 1, 2009 Posted October 1, 2009 I think its key to ensure that you being here, espcially in the second chances, coping, etc section, does not keep you emersed in a bad breakup any longer than is neccesary. I think this place is a great place to run ideas by people, and get good constructive feedback, but if youre still posting about the same ex, saying 'will she be back' etc, after a few months - its time for a break. Ive had to take one myself, and I actually browse/post on most of the other topic forums, too. It seems that a lost of people keep posting different threads, worded differently or asking slightly different variations of the same questions, in hopes that someone will tell them an ex is coming back. Thats not healthy. Its great to talk out your problems and move on, its not good to dwell, though. I don't think that has anything to do with the forums though....it is your mindset that already exists that causes you to come online and ask these questions. So in reality, if you are not over you ex, hoping everyday they will come back so you keep asking about them on LS....taking a break from LS won't solve that issue because it is an issue within yourself and your mindset.
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