Lynx331 Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 I broke up with my girl about 2 weeks ago.. It has been a week yesterday of no contact. I broke up with her because I guess I thought it was te right thing to do, but mostly because every person around me didn't like the way she treated me and how I gave up things that I loved to do for her.. And they said he wasn't good for me... Like I said it's been a week.. Of NC and I am sitting here wishing she would come find me... Andtell me she wants to make everything work.. No matter what.. I just want to talk to her.. I think thTs the hardest thing is not talking to her at all... I just want to talk to her so bad... I just this morning started a journal.. Where I am writing a note to her.. That I won't send.. Just to try and get my feelings out.. I just can't understand how I can love someone this much.. And try this hard for someone.. And then they make everything my fault.. How do I convince myself it's best not to talk to someone?? I just want to talkto her......
Author Lynx331 Posted September 23, 2009 Author Posted September 23, 2009 Ok really weird.... She just texted me... I haven't read it yet.... Do I read it..?? Or straight up delete it without reading it... I honestly feel better now that she texted me.. Because maybe she is just as tore up as I am... What do I do..?
Author Lynx331 Posted September 23, 2009 Author Posted September 23, 2009 Ok well... I have an iPhone so when I got a text from my buddy.. I had to go to the list and select my buddy from the list and read his message.. So I saw hers.. It just said hey how are you....
adamt Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 It is only the early stages of your break up so you havent started to feel the benfit of NC. When people talk of NC it is over a period of months and not days/weeks. Just don't respond to her. Sounds like she wants to keep tabsl on you. Block her number and do whatever you can to break that ball and chain she has around your feet. you have to go throuigh cols turkey before the benefits of NC kick in. You have to stick at it otherwise you can't begin to move on
Author Lynx331 Posted September 23, 2009 Author Posted September 23, 2009 It is only the early stages of your break up so you havent started to feel the benfit of NC. When people talk of NC it is over a period of months and not days/weeks. Just don't respond to her. Sounds like she wants to keep tabsl on you. Block her number and do whatever you can to break that ball and chain she has around your feet. you have to go throuigh cols turkey before the benefits of NC kick in. You have to stick at it otherwise you can't begin to move on Ok that sounds like a plan, but see this is my problem.. I'd love to NOT move on from her. I'd love to work on things together and make a relationship everything I know it COULD have been... That's why I think it's so hard is I don't necessarily WANT to be away from her
countingufosagain Posted September 26, 2009 Posted September 26, 2009 This just happened to me Monday and I did respond. I personally feel that ignoring someone is immature but believe that many here would feel differently. In my situation its provided a small setback. I have thought about her more over the past few days but it will be fleeting I'm sure. Texting is a weak method of someone trying to figure out if you're still somewhat available to them. They feel no sense of risk to their ego because it took little to no energy. I split with my ex because i couldn't deal with the arguing and the manipulation. I think if you split with her because of what outsiders were telling you to do, that's a little weak. If she made you happy then talk to her and see if things can be worked out. If you were being her doormat she would eventually leave you and that may be why your friends and family advised that you run.
GrayClouds Posted September 26, 2009 Posted September 26, 2009 mostly because every person around me didn't like the way she treated me and Did you like the way she treated you? how I gave up things that I loved to do for her.. And they said he wasn't good for me... The giving up things is about you not her, And they said he wasn't good for me... Family or friends. If it was friends were they just upset your not spending your time with them? If you ae wanting her to come to you and win you over again that is game playing and is not fair. Before you broke up did you let her know what concerns you had in the relationship what changes you felt were needed? Did you give her a chance to decide if she could make those changes? If not you may have cheater youslef and her from a better relationship between the two of you.
rp123 Posted September 26, 2009 Posted September 26, 2009 Ok that sounds like a plan, but see this is my problem.. I'd love to NOT move on from her. I'd love to work on things together and make a relationship everything I know it COULD have been... That's why I think it's so hard is I don't necessarily WANT to be away from her What are you doing? YOU broke up with her, but you want her? Sort it out. And get it back on!!!!!!
aloneinseattle Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 how long were you dating her for? and why did you break up with her if you want her back?
smookie Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 I think that if you really want to be with her then what is ignioring her going to do? It will not pull her closer to you. Text her back call her, She has made the first attempt to talk so now it's up to you. If you do not care (and it sounds like you do) get ahold of her and you never know.... Keep us updated... I did the same broke up with my ex because my friends hated the way that he treated me and I could never do anything with them because they did not want him around. Do make the mistake. CONTACT HER....
Beeotch Posted September 27, 2009 Posted September 27, 2009 I think that if you really want to be with her then what is ignioring her going to do? It will not pull her closer to you. Text her back call her, She has made the first attempt to talk so now it's up to you. If you do not care (and it sounds like you do) get ahold of her and you never know.... Keep us updated... I did the same broke up with my ex because my friends hated the way that he treated me and I could never do anything with them because they did not want him around. Do make the mistake. CONTACT HER.... I agree I find it interesting that you have not said why it is that YOU wanted to break up but you have cited your friends and what THEY think about your relationship as the cause for cutting it off. Now...sometimes our friends may observe what we do not and sometimes it takes them saying something before we see it. BUT it seems as if you have not come to agree with them. Do you see what they're saying? Is what they're observing true? Do YOU agree that the relationship was unhealthy/not working/not enough etc? You need to ask YOURSELF those questions and not be so dependent upon other people's opinions. That might be a problem that affected/will affect all your relationships, if you break up with people not based on you OWN reflections and what you think is best for you but simply because others say you should. That is something you might want to work on....sometimes we blame our exes for everything but in the long run that doesn't help because if you STILL have some issue that you haven't resolved, no matter who you date it will come up again and again. So maybe you should use this time to work on yourself and figure some stuff out that will help YOU and then in turn help your future relationships.
quarterlifecrisis Posted September 29, 2009 Posted September 29, 2009 I'm pretty confused. If you broke up with her and then established NC, you aren't creating a path for her to approach you. If you continue to ignore her after she texts you, how does that make her want to work things out with you? Had she broken up and you established NC, then in theory, she may begin to miss you and want to talk to you. Then you have a window for discussion. It seems like you are very unclear as to whether or not you want to be with her. If you do, then talk to her and make it work. You were the one that broke up with her and you should re-initiate and have a joint discussion. If you don't want to be with her, then give up and move on. Then NC is much more appropriate.
Recommended Posts