robotsavage Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 I have been dating this girl for a month and finding that we get along extremely well. i can talk to her for hours and the physical aspect of the relationship is terrific. although we have started seeing each other recently, i've known her for a few months now and i've fallen for her. im now in my thirties and this is only the second time i've felt this way. i've not yet told her this. the problem is that she wants an open relationship. when we started seeing each other, she had stated that she had feelings for me, but was not interested in an exclusive relationship. i naively agreed to the condition thinking i could win her over in time. she has now just started seeing another guy, nothing has happened between them yet but i am having a tough time knowing that something eventually will. any other girl in this situation i'd drop her immediately, but i love her and sometimes it seems that her feelings for me are growing. my RL friends have been divided as far as advice goes. half say end it, the other half have told me i need to pursue it knowing how rare it is for me to feel this way about a girl. my gut is telling me i need to risk anything/everything because i love her. am i doomed or Do i have any chance of turning this around into a committed relationship? should i stick it out?
Trialbyfire Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 Never look to potential. It's what she's willing to give now. If she can't give you what you want now, it's time to find someone who can. Don't waste your time trying to change anyone. You'll find that it's only an exercise in futility.
boogieboy Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 She doesnt really want an open relationship, she just wants to have her cake and eat it too. Shes taking advantage of you. Sher's not that into you, but she IS into the other guy, she just doesnt want to lose you. Normally you'd dump her, well you should. She will never be into you like you are into her. It's possible that you showed her too much or your heart too soon, and it blew the challenge for her. I know you really fell for her, but theres nothing to salvage here. Dont fall for someone who WANTS to see someone else. Chances are she is falling for the other guy. If you cut her off right now, and the other guy doesnttreat her right, its possible she might come back to you, but she probably still wont fall for you then.
Thaddeus Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 Never look to potential. It's what she's willing to give now. She doesnt really want an open relationship, she just wants to have her cake and eat it too.TBF and BB nailed it. You're being played, my friend. You're, at best, the fall-back position. Have some self-respect. Sure, you may feel you love her and all that nice happy bunny stuff, but no woman is worth giving up your self-respect. Cut her loose.
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