letinmotion Posted September 22, 2009 Posted September 22, 2009 I've made a few posts about the girl I was seeing the past couple of months and this post is again about the same girl. I've recently realized that I can be horribly guarded with my feelings etc. In regards to the person I'm seeing. I've done quite well in being open with this girl I've been seeing. Or at least I thought. A little background on myself... I was a total dork growing up and was the ultimate late bloomer. I started a business when I was 14 and still own and run it today. Thus, I'm an attractive, wealthy, confident and assertive guy. I can't help but think my business has dehumanized me a bit. I've even been called out for talking way too smooth that it almost sounds rehearsed. It doesn't surprise me though considering I'm paid to speak for a living... There's been a couple falling outs with this girl I've been seeing. Nothing too major just some problems with communication. I completely chastised her on her bday for blowing me off. I told her I wanted to see her on her bday and never heard anything from her. It's gone downhill since then based on some very stupid assumptions I made. I told her to just make things simple and asked her if it was over or not. She said it was over and proceeded to say that she feels like a play her like a pawn in a game of chess, that I talk down to her like she's inferior to me and that shell feel like everything is fine and then she thinks she did something wrong. I was shocked by what she had to say. I told her that a friendship may be possible after some time has passed but not now. I feel like I blew it though she's not exactly innocent in this. I really like this girl and Ive given the wrong impression. I know she likes me but I think I just pushed her over the edge. Not to meantion things moved quite fast and for her that was weird. I still don't feel like her well enough to write her off but I don't need another friend. I read something a while back about salvaging short term relationships. Basically meeting up with her to try and shift things in a new direction. As well as making it clear you want to see where things go but at a pace she's comfortable with. I hate to live life holding back and well regret having never said anything. I think it night be worth a shot and it could go either way. I'm just not sure how to go about setting this up and if I should really just count my losses and move on. Please help!
Author letinmotion Posted September 22, 2009 Author Posted September 22, 2009 I more or less want to know if I'm kicking a dead horse or not.
Thaddeus Posted September 22, 2009 Posted September 22, 2009 For a lot of men, affairs of the heart can be a two-way street. If a guy falls out of love, it's relatively easy for a guy to fall back into love with the same person. Not so, generally, with women. Once they've lost that lovin' feelin' (with apologies to the Righteous Brothers) it seldom, if ever, comes back. By all means, you can give it a try to avoid having a regret in the future, but frankly I give it 1 chance in 10 that she'll see it the same way you do.
torranceshipman Posted September 22, 2009 Posted September 22, 2009 How do you feel about your actions on her b-day? It depends on how you talk to her when you meet up again (if you do) and if she realizes that you truly understand why you were really out of order to her by ruining her birthday, etc...
Author letinmotion Posted September 23, 2009 Author Posted September 23, 2009 How do you feel about your actions on her b-day? It depends on how you talk to her when you meet up again (if you do) and if she realizes that you truly understand why you were really out of order to her by ruining her birthday, etc... she met up with me and I would have assumed that she already knew what I was going to say yet she still showed up. We are done for now. We are just looking for different things and we just need to take a break from each other right now, do our own thing and see what happens. We are all creators of our own destiny anything could happen with this but I don't think its possible to have a friendship when there is obvious attraction. Just wouldnt be fair to both of us to engage in a friendship right now or ever I dont think. There is strong physical attraction and I can tell. I've tried being friends with a lot of my ex girlfriends, etc. It just doesnt work. Physical needs always get in the way for me.
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