Maxwell Sage Posted September 21, 2009 Posted September 21, 2009 I've only been in love once thus far in life and the girl with whom I shared this one of a kind connection with dumped me back in mid July after stating that I simply didn't have what she was looking for these days. I ultimately slipped into serious depression since we had been living together and basing our lives around each other for over two and a half years leading up to this, only to have my way of life be shattered. Instead of going NC, I would talk to her each day in an effort to keep things going and hopefully patch up whatever separated us. However, this just lead to me feeling worse and worse due to the fact that I knew she would eventually find someone new. In the mean time, I dreamt on four separate nights about her saying we had a chance to be together again, and once she would say this, I would know I was dreaming and wake up feeling absolutely crushed and even more so lonely... So about a month and a half passes by and I find myself venting to her over the phone about the dreams I've been having as well as every other morbid thought that had been running through my mind, when I ask her to tell me why we'd never be together again so I could perhaps accept it and move on... She then very reluctantly explained that she had a new boyfriend with whom she had been very happy and close with for over a month... I hurt more intensely than I ever fathomed I could... And this all came about a week before what would have been our three year anniversary... The day celebrating the happiest turning point in both of our young lives... All of this took place a week ago and yesterday was the day on which we would have celebrated... So naturally, it was weighing in on me and I guess that's why I dreamt about her last night... I had a couple other creepy dreams, but in the one I had about her, she was humming one of our favorite songs. A song that we listened to while on ecstasy, walking barefoot through the street while holding hands... This is such a happy and awesome memory for me... My first and only love... Holding hands and listening to music with a GORGEOUS individual, knowing at the end of the night that there was going to be awesome sex... Needless to say, I didn't want to wake up this morning... I do have to say that I'm feeling far better in wake of having this dream as opposed to the other four I had. This morning I just woke up sad and kind of lonely as opposed to crushed into hopelessness... Sigh... Any one gone through something similar or have any optimistic feedback to offer?
livingnightmare Posted September 21, 2009 Posted September 21, 2009 Going through similar except mine was for 6 years and we have a 3 1/2 yr old together and she left me to start sleeping around! I know how you feel she was my first love too(I think not sure what it is I felt?) and first girl I slept with! She told me the gory details of what shes up 2 to hurt me, I was pulling through slowly its only been six seven weeks since the break up but 2 weeks today since she told me what she is up to and to top it off she has ran off with my daughter and havnt seen my lil girl since! feeling real down today! Keep having dreams just before i wake up where everything is normal again and we are back in our old house feel dreadfull when I wake up!
Author Maxwell Sage Posted September 21, 2009 Author Posted September 21, 2009 Oh, man... I hope this is the last of these dreams...
livingnightmare Posted September 21, 2009 Posted September 21, 2009 Do u wake up go back to sleep then have the dreams?
Author Maxwell Sage Posted September 22, 2009 Author Posted September 22, 2009 I have the dream, wake up, feel ****ty, then either lay in bed or get up depending on what time it is.
rayellis1127 Posted September 22, 2009 Posted September 22, 2009 Maxwell, I've had pretty nasty dreams about my ex recently. To get back to sleep I move from the end of the bed I'm sleeping to the other (from head of bed to foot of bed) or move my bed across the floor. I don't know where I've picked up this but it's helped me sleep the second time around without dreams. I don't know if it's going to help you. I wish I could support you more. One thing I've learned in the past few days is the more you talk to your ex the more you'll give her resolve in her actions with someone else. Everything I've read here and across the web encourages no contact at all. And for me, even though it's barely been a few days, it's certainly helped knowing I've cut all ties. And some periods through the day are excellent and some are not. But overall they get better and better the more I implement those good advises I read here. Keep reading around. Read other stories and the advise given to them and apply it if you think it'll help. You can get through this brother. I just started having dreams and I've had two so far. And yet, while these problems are why I came and keep posting here, I feel better every time I make a post. The amount of time I spend feeling badly shortens. And I even had a good time this weekend. It'll work brother, just hang around and socialize. At least,that's what's helping me. It's not making the dreams stop,but it's helping me cope with the feelings I have resulting from the dreams. Good luck and keep us updated.
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