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Attempted a breakup of sorts.. Backed out


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So I'm more confused than I've ever been in my life.

 

We're 25, in a 5 year relationship, living togeather 2 of those 5 years ( got a place after college). I'm not sure if I want to be in a relationship, but the thought of breakig up with her kills me - yet I've still got that voice in my head that say, just end it - no more waisting time.

 

Anyway I almost tried to end it by suggesting basically that this may not be working out. I couldn't handle seeing her cry, and quickly changed my attitude to, "well let's work this out".

 

The biggest thing on my mind is, I don't think I want to get married for another 7-10 years at least. But it would be ashame to just waist 5 years here. I'm not even sure if I should marry this girl anyway. So if there is no marriage in the future, it should just end right? I still care about her so it's incredibly hard not to hurt her, but I still feel like this needs to end.

 

Any advice on how to stay strong and listen to my gut instead of just being Affriad to hurt her?

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