CSU Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I've been talking to a guy in the navy for about a month now. I know it'll be hard to keep communication and all but lately things been pretty off. When we first started to talk he would call or text me every night. Now I call him and we would talk for 15 minutes tops and he would say he would call me back but never does. I'm not the kind of girl to wait around for a phone call but you could at least have the decency to call me. That's just how I feel. When everything was going fine he told me that he would never hurt me but I feel like that's what he's doing to me. I don't know. I want to call him and tell him how I feel but I know me and the way I say things may come off as being a b*tch. I've tried writing down what I want to say but it still sound b*tchy. So I guess what I want to know is how should I approach him about this issue without sounding mean or selfish?
tinktronik Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 If it has already been a month I would say he is losing interest. On the other hand there is nothing wrong with asking if he is just the sort that ends a conversation with "hey I'll call you back in 15 min."
alphamale Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 so you've never actually met this person?
Author CSU Posted September 17, 2009 Author Posted September 17, 2009 I have met him but he lives 3 hours away from me
alphamale Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I have met him but he lives 3 hours away from me maybe you should go visit him and see whats up?
tinktronik Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I have met him but he lives 3 hours away from me How old are you?
Author CSU Posted September 17, 2009 Author Posted September 17, 2009 That's thing... he wants or more like wanted to see me last week but I had a wedding. Now I'm trying to reach him and ask him when would be a good time but whenever I try to he just says he's busy and he'll call me later. Tink, I'm 20
DidiLU Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 Walk away. Not worth it. 3 hours away. Find someone within 30 minutes and who works in the business world. Less heartache later. Walk away.
tinktronik Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 That's thing... he wants or more like wanted to see me last week but I had a wedding. Now I'm trying to reach him and ask him when would be a good time but whenever I try to he just says he's busy and he'll call me later. Tink, I'm 20 How many times have you tried to call and he's given you the brushoff?
Author CSU Posted September 18, 2009 Author Posted September 18, 2009 I called him monday night and we talked for 15 minutes and then yesterday he told me he was busy and he would call me back but never did.
tinktronik Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 I called him monday night and we talked for 15 minutes and then yesterday he told me he was busy and he would call me back but never did. I would say to wait and give him a chance to contact you. If he does not in the next 5 days let him know you are moving on.
Author CSU Posted September 18, 2009 Author Posted September 18, 2009 That's a long time to hold in what I need to get off my chest
BCCA Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 I would say to wait and give him a chance to contact you. If he does not in the next 5 days let him know you are moving on. If hes saying he'll call you back, but then doesnt, does he even apologize or acknowledge it the next time? Honestly, hes in the Navy and 3 hours away, it really isnt worth this frustration already. Bad sign, IMO.
tinktronik Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 That's a long time to hold in what I need to get off my chest I'm really relaxed in a relationship until I put any demands on it. Honestly, I don't view any relationship as anything other than friends for about a year. So my standards may be lax. If you have a problem with him saying he will call you back in 15... say something to him.
Author CSU Posted September 18, 2009 Author Posted September 18, 2009 BCCA, when I talk him after he doesn't call he just says he's been caught up with work.
BCCA Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 BCCA, when I talk him after he doesn't call he just says he's been caught up with work. Where did you meet this guy? Im just wondering if its worth your time. If it was me, I would just stop calling him all together, and see what he does. If its nothing, there is your answer.
icemann12 Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 i was in a long distance relationship for 2.5 years that i just ended and im happier than i ever was, its a ton of un-needed stress and annoyance, and if things like this are already happening then you should waste your heart on it, really, you can find someone who will be better suited for you, you dont need to cater to someone to make them come closer, im 21 btw, similar age..
Author CSU Posted September 18, 2009 Author Posted September 18, 2009 I met him at the mall when he was up here.
BCCA Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 I met him at the mall when he was up here. Is that the one time you actually saw him in person? Have you had sex with this guy?
Author CSU Posted September 18, 2009 Author Posted September 18, 2009 I haven't had sex with him and that was the only time I've seen him.
Mary3 Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 If you are stressing about this then its more internal. Meaning your instincts tell you this guy is NOT doing what he says he is going to do . I say it again : IF the words don't match the ACTIONS , its a NO brainer . He does NOT keep his word ..Alot simpler on your mind. Him not contacting you : He could be losing interest. If a guy is CRAZY about you , then you cant get rid of him. On the other hand , maybe you seem desperate to him and its making him turn off. Do NOT unload on him ! Its the kiss of death .. He should be doing what he is doing and it makes you feel wanted and special. If you feel ignored and neglected then THATS what it usually is.. When you give the guy a TALK its the deathblow ! Let it ride itself out., You keeep busy. Forget this guy...
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