Poison Oak Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 Hello, all! I'm new to LoveShack. I'm making the assumption that at SOME point virginity becomes a turn-off to guys, whether it be 20 or 50. I'm in high school, and I don't really want to date until college. I find the vast majority of guys in high school way too immature. Besides, I don't see a lot of high school couples surviving forever, and I don't want to go through a heartbreak in the midst of my high school career or even college, to be honest. I don't want something like that to interfere with my future/career (sorry I sound like a nerd!). With that said, most of my friends have already lost their virginities, some even as far back as middle school. I've never even had a boyfriend. I have been asked out before, but not by someone I'm attracted to/someone I would date (I like sweet, smart guys; I swear to God 99% of the guys from my generation are all dumb AND shallow dicks). I feel pressured to lose my virginity or at least do everything else, if you catch my drift. I would like to wait until I'm in a long-term relationship to have sex or even until marriage but that seems so rare now that I highly doubt I'm going to do that. I'm afraid when I DO get a boyfriend in the future, it'll be a turn-off that I'm a virgin, and if that's not the case I'm afraid that the guy won't be a virgin and I'll feel odd and insecure that I'm not as experienced. Any advice, insight, or opinions? Thank you!
Thornton Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 A decent guy won't find virginity to be a turn-off at any age, so wait as long as you like, until you feel ready.
aerogurl87 Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 Wait until your ready to do it with the right guy. For me, that guy came around at the age of 18 and although we are no longer together, I'm glad that I lost it to him. He was my first real boyfriend who genuinely cared about me and never pressured me into sex. (Actually I asked him if we could have sex, lol.) So yes, definitely wait for the right guy and the right time. And no guy will ever find virginity to be a turn off.
boogieboy Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 Its not virginity thats a turn off, its your apprehension to sex and different sex acts in general. It takes a patient guy to ease a girl into a new sexual mentality. Youre going to get heartbroken at some point, its better that you get it over with early so you learn how to handle it. The way it usually goes is most women never stay with the guy that they lose their virginity to. Eventually they move on to new guys and experiment more with sex and discovering personalities. So dont worry, a guy that is into you wouldnt have a problem being patient for you. As long as youre not a total buzzkill with sex after wards (which is subjective).
always_searching Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 Honestly: Some guys might find it to be a turn off. That being said: You don't want to date those jerks, anyway! You've waited this long; I think your admirable wait would be an absolute waste if you throw it away on just anybody now. It's better to wait until your 40 to have sex with the right person than to get your heart broken and your body used by the wrong person now. Whatever you decide: Good luck and be careful!
Author Poison Oak Posted September 17, 2009 Author Posted September 17, 2009 You should take this to a teen forum. If I were to post this in a teen forum, I'm sure most of the answers would be along the lines of, "I lost my virginity when I was 14, but you can lose yours whenever you want," which isn't very helpful.
carhill Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 FWIW, those folks who split the sheets before they could drive have just as much a chance of being f*cked up at middle age as someone who waited, like I did. Sex isn't race. If you don't want to date and have sex until college, so be it. More power to you Welcome to LS. Teens are welcomed along with the rest of the world
icemann12 Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 im 21 and male, virginity is never really a turn off, the only thing that can get people is when a girl loses her virginity she tends to get attached to the male, some guys are afraid of that, those are the guys you dont want, when you find the right guy you will both be comfortable, no worries kiddo.
Marks Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 Well, I'm a guy in his early 20's, I don't know what it's like for girls, but I seriously regret not dating earlier. At least by now I'd have some idea of what I was doing. And I don't mean sex, just the whole dating process in general. For me it has been a learning process, trial and error.
BeSteady Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 Hello, all! I'm new to LoveShack. I'm making the assumption that at SOME point virginity becomes a turn-off to guys, whether it be 20 or 50. I'm in high school, and I don't really want to date until college. I find the vast majority of guys in high school way too immature. Besides, I don't see a lot of high school couples surviving forever, and I don't want to go through a heartbreak in the midst of my high school career or even college, to be honest. I don't want something like that to interfere with my future/career (sorry I sound like a nerd!). With that said, most of my friends have already lost their virginities, some even as far back as middle school. I've never even had a boyfriend. I have been asked out before, but not by someone I'm attracted to/someone I would date (I like sweet, smart guys; I swear to God 99% of the guys from my generation are all dumb AND shallow dicks). I feel pressured to lose my virginity or at least do everything else, if you catch my drift. I would like to wait until I'm in a long-term relationship to have sex or even until marriage but that seems so rare now that I highly doubt I'm going to do that. I'm afraid when I DO get a boyfriend in the future, it'll be a turn-off that I'm a virgin, and if that's not the case I'm afraid that the guy won't be a virgin and I'll feel odd and insecure that I'm not as experienced. Any advice, insight, or opinions? Thank you! Confidence of knowing what you want is always a turn on. Trust yourself and wait until it is right time.
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