prettybaby Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 Do you think it matters to know? Is it normal not to know? Or do most people know their partner's sexual past? I admit it's something I'm a bit curious about, but not to the point where I can be bothered to ask him. However, there was a thread today on another forum, and it seems like most young women my age are very well aware of their partner's number, and I was pretty surprised as I wondered if maybe we're an odd couple for not talking about each other's sexual past. Would it open a can of worms? It's not like I'm dying to know, but once in a while I get a bit curious about it lol What are the pros and the cons of knowing?
alphamale Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 the question is moot as most people lie about their numbers, in real life i mean
callingyouuu Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I was reading an article about a study that was done on males and females regarding the "number". Guys usually reported their numbers to be a LOT larger than girls do, which doesn't make a lot of sense given that it requires two to tango, so to speak. Or there could be a LOT of 2 guys 1 girl threesomes going on that I don't know about.
alphamale Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 for men you generally divide the number in half and then add one. for women you would double the number and add two
bluewolf17 Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 A lady doesn't tell. I have been offered up that information, but have never asked for it. The number neither impresses me or disgusts me. If you HAVE TO know (or just really want to know) keep this in mind. The pro's of knowing? Umm... The Con's? Well now you know.
Author prettybaby Posted September 17, 2009 Author Posted September 17, 2009 ^^ That being said, it implies that those people actually talk about their number, even if they're lying about it. Are we weird for never bringing this up? I don't see the big deal - I don't really care either way, and I could go on with my life without knowing. But since most people seem to know so much about their S/O's sexual past, I'm just wondering, what are the + points of knowing (or even if either party is lying, to at least bring it up)?
GorillaTheater Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 My wife was a virgin, I wasn't. I hadn't had THAT many partners, but I don't think she ever asked one way or the other. If she would've asked, I would've answered.
Thaddeus Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I was reading an article about a study that was done on males and females regarding the "number". Guys usually reported their numbers to be a LOT larger than girls do, which doesn't make a lot of sense given that it requires two to tango, so to speak.I saw something similar but damned if I can find it right now. Basically the article said that if a man tells you his number, subtract 1/3 of the total. If a woman tells you her number, add 1/3 of the total. Not sure how accurate that is though. I'm also not sure what good can come from knowing anyway, excluding the obvious caveats of possible STDs and whatnot.
Chicago_Guy Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I'd rather not know because I would probably be disgusted if I found out a girl I was in a relationship had been with a lot of guys.
tomtom26 Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I would want to know my girl's number, but would never ask for it. I kinda don't think it's my business what she did before me. If she offered to tell me, I would be all for it, and I'd be lying if the answer didn't change my perception of her. I know this can be wrong, and we've all mistakes, but I'm not THAT picky when it comes to this. If she had been with 30-40 guys, I'd probably be a bit weirded out and probably would see her more negatively. On the flip side, I also prefer that the girl I get have some experience, because its important to know how to please your men, but at the same time, know how to please themselves while being with guy. I think we all need a bit of experience, but too much is no good in my book. Pros: You find out the # Cons: You find out the # The information is dependent on your own prejudices and views.
alphamale Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 in general asking some for "their number" is a lose-lose scenario for all involved.
Trialbyfire Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 Prettybaby, if it matters to you, ask. If it doesn't, don't ask. I ask and tell my partners. I've got nothing to hide. If a partner finds my numbers too low, that's their problem not mine. If I find that a partner has numbers too high, that's my problem not theirs and I will act, as I see fit, reliant on those numbers, as they will act, according to their personal biases. No big deal.
alphamale Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I ask and tell my partners. I've got nothing to hide. If a partner finds my numbers too low, that's their problem not mine. If I find that a partner has numbers too high, that's my problem not theirs and I will act, as I see fit, reliant on those numbers, as they will act, according to their personal biases. No big deal. once the cat is out of the bag you can never get it back in and it will haunt you at some point in the future, trust me on this
Trialbyfire Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 once the cat is out of the bag you can never get it back in and it will haunt you at some point in the future, trust me on thisThere's only one guy who ever had difficulty with my numbers but then, he never got laid so that probably impacted on his after-the-fact issue about it. Sour grapes, et al. Once again, if numbers are important to you, don't hesitate to ask. Finding out about something meaningful, after being with someone for years, being in love with them, can cause major fallout, in the future. Just read all those male threads about jealousy, after the fact. If numbers don't matter to you, don't bring it up, just for idle curiosity sakes.
BCCA Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 Who cares, really? The number makes no difference, as long as theirs no STDS. Get tested, and at that point, I could care less.
alphamale Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 There's only one guy who ever had difficulty with my numbers but then, he never got laid so that probably impacted on his after-the-fact issue about it. Sour grapes, et al. Once again, if numbers are important to you, don't hesitate to ask. Finding out about something meaningful, after being with someone for years, being in love with them, can cause major fallout, in the future. Just read all those male threads about jealousy, after the fact. If numbers don't matter to you, don't bring it up, just for idle curiosity sakes. I prefer a "don't ask, don't tell" policy in these matters...
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