Jaytb Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 hey guys, I don't think OP came here just to have her relationship judged. Sheesh.
dreamergrl Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I'll agree there will be a few instances that it can work, but I don't see it likely happening. I'm not saying all older men and all younger girls are this way, but a 29 year old guy is most likely going to be at a different place in life. He may not be ready for marriage, but you got to take into consideration all the things most young people get into at 20. Partying, silly mistakes, school, deciding who they are and what they want to be, still experiencing adult relationships for the first time, and what not. Most 29 year old men are way past all that.
SoulSearch_CO Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 Don't make a big deal about it. Tell them about all his good qualities, why you like him, the fun stuff you do together, etc. Then when they ask how old he is, drop it like it's nothing, "Oh, he's 29." If they flip, they flip. Nothing you can do to change that. If you make a big deal out of his age, though - likely they will, too. I don't think 9 years is that big of a deal...but then, I married somebody 15 years older (divorced now - nothing to do with the age gap) and am now dating somebody 14 years older. 9 years...bah.
johnloyd Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 Well honestly, i think any ways will do. The important there is you should tell your parents and JUST BE HONEST!... So, good luck in your confessions....
xpaperxcutx Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I go by a policy that unless my parents asked, I don't tell. I don't think a 9 year age difference is that big of a gap, but there might be a conflict in personality and interests. I do think however that the chances for a lasting relationship to occur is slim at best because people at different stages of life would want different things, and given that the guy would soon approach 30, he would think in terms of two things: career and dating around ( for fun) or marriage and children. If it's the former, he wouldn't mind being in a relationship with a younger women let alone an 18yr old and it's not even because of maturity so much as certain men just have a preference for younger women. Now if it's the latter and a 30 year old is seeking marriage, he wouldn't consider a 20 yr let alone a mid twenties female because they're barely out of college or settled financially in life. I do believe most men wanting to settle down would want to seek a women who's at least financially stable ( and not a gold digger).
gypsy_nicky Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I would like to add that caliguy and BCCA have it right down. As long as your not violating age consent laws then it should be fine. Mental and calendar age are very different due to people's life's experience (some have experienced more some less in an x amount of time) which reflects your current state of mind i.e your mental age. Dreamrgrl, not demeaning you but you seem to condescend people who are much younger and see them as immature which is not the case most times.
bella16 Posted September 17, 2009 Posted September 17, 2009 I really don't think 9 years is a bad age difference at all. If you are that concerned about your parents, then you should just be straight up with them about it. You are your own person though, and you should be able to date whomever you want. My current bf just turned 30 years old and I'm only 23... the oldest I've ever dated so far, and we've been together 7 months now. I'm so glad that he came into my life because I wouldn't be deeply in love with someone right now. The age thing never crossed my mind as being an issue, because really it is just a number and I love him for the person he is and not how old he is.
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