TeacupMovinON Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 My ex, on some days, says he loves me, misses me, cries for me. He is so sorry, yada yada... Then the next day I am back to being chopped liver and he flaunts his girlfriend in my face. Why??? Why mess with emotions like that?
trueblue72ny Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 im not sure i understand why someone would do that. the only thing i can think of off hand is because maybe they want to see if they can keep you around in case there new interest doesn't pan out?????? or maybe it is an ego boost to him that he has two women that he can talk to like that. not sure. it seems kind of selfish in my humble opinion IF thats the case. & it sure is not fair TO YOU.
Author TeacupMovinON Posted September 16, 2009 Author Posted September 16, 2009 It is confusing. I cannot understand his motives. It's over, I get that. Why throw all the drama and mixed emotions in to this...
TaraMaiden Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 he does it because you let him. So deny him that permission.... If you know he keeps doing this, why stay in contact with him? It's disrespectful to you, AND to his new GF... does she know he keeps telling you this? Woah, I'd be well and truly p*ss*d if my BF was doing this with his ex. He'd soon be my ex, too.... Stop taking his calls, texts, messages and stop - if you're doing so - checking on his MySpace/Facebook account. If you have one too, block and delete..... The less room you give him to get in, the less he can invade your mental space and annoy you.
Leia Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 My ex, on some days, says he loves me, misses me, cries for me. He is so sorry, yada yada... Then the next day I am back to being chopped liver and he flaunts his girlfriend in my face. Why??? Why mess with emotions like that? FFS. Just tell him to flaunt his girlfriend elsewhere. He should respect his relationship, not disrespect it by telling you he misses you bla bla bla. Some guys are plain stupid.
Author TeacupMovinON Posted September 16, 2009 Author Posted September 16, 2009 I work with him so some contact is required. He always knows how to squirm his way in... Whats funny is that you are right about the facebook thing. He is not my friend on there but I cant help but looking at his profile picture. They usually consist of him being in a loving embrace with my relpacement. It's like a sore, I know it's there, but I can't help but keep picking at it... No, the poor new GF probably has no idea. She is madly in love and he is moving in to her house. He talks about her terribly (some days) and other days he is madly in love with her. I feel sorry for her too. What I wonder is why he would want to do this?? Why?
Nikki Sahagin Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 If he is in a new relationship, i'd say there's something very manipulative in saying he still loves you. But is he in a relationship or just dating/seeing people? Maybe he is rebounding, maybe he is trying to push your buttons. Sadly, we can't read their minds!
trueblue72ny Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 It's disrespectful to you, AND to his new GF... does she know he keeps telling you this? Woah, I'd be well and truly p*ss*d if my BF was doing this with his ex. He'd soon be my ex, too.... thats a good point Tara. definately isnt fair to his new girlfriend. if my GF was telling her ex she still loved him, lets just say it would NOT make me a happy camper. I seriously doubt he tells his new GF. i would almost bet my house on it. & flaunting his new girl in front of you?? thats not too classy. lets just say IF, down the road, he wants to work something out with you (IF YOU LET HIM), than you would be wondering in the back of your mind is he doing the same thing behind your back. trust issues abound.
trueblue72ny Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 I work with him so some contact is required. He always knows how to squirm his way in... Uggggggggg!!! i share your pain. i work with mine too. and she knows how to squirm her way back in as well...
mr heartbroken Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 this is a very evil thing to do on his part. You love him and he can still treat you like this? Think about what he is doing to you both. I bet his ex doesnt know he is talking to you. it may be true he may still have feelings for you. he might want to keep you close until he knows if things with this other girl will work out. end of the day are you will to wait around for him? are you going to wait on a txt a call. easier said than done go out and meet new people start enjoying single life. at this point he may be thinking the grass in greener...... go out and see of it is!!!!!!!
mickleb Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 Because he has NO idea what he is saying or what he wants or who he is...and it may take him his whole life to find out. Step AWAY from the car crash and try to look at him with an expression of pity, whenever your paths have to meet at work. When you get home, get as angry as you need to then figure out how to avoid inflated egos like him, in the future. Good luck. x
Author TeacupMovinON Posted September 16, 2009 Author Posted September 16, 2009 Thank you guys for your responses. I needed the extra help and support today! It's funny how good advice from strangers can give me the strength to keep on goin'! I am an emotional wreck at times, I have found the more distance from him, the better. I will keep working on that...
Lish Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 Personally, I find it quite amazing you can be bothered to listen to this guy. He's your EX for a reason & he's clearly messing with your head. I'd go with no contact. I dunno why people insist on prolonging the pain...really.
trueblue72ny Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 i think it just takes awhile to get to that point sometimes for some people. unfortunately. i am definately one of those kind of people myself, it takes awhile, unfortauntely. did i say unfortunately already?
Trialbyfire Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 My ex, on some days, says he loves me, misses me, cries for me. He is so sorry, yada yada... Then the next day I am back to being chopped liver and he flaunts his girlfriend in my face. Why??? Why mess with emotions like that?It's one of a few possibilities: He's emotionally unstable.He's in a rebound relationship and using his current g/f.He's hoping to have his cake and eat it too, with two women.Get away from this mess. Stick to NC.
Ingenue Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 I'd stay away from your ex by every means possible, though that may prove difficult considering that he's your co-worker. Your best recourse is to simply ignore everything that comes out of his mouth that isn't work related. I realize that it's easier said than done, but he's manipulating you and your emotions. As blunt as this may sound, if he loves you and misses you as much as he says, he'd be with you. I speak from experience here. My ex did the exact same thing. He dumped me, was with a woman within days of dumping me (and I'm sure he cheated on me at the end of the relationship), and would continue to send me emails within 2 weeks of dumping me with expressions of love. After 5 months of NC, we spoke and he told me he still loved me and cared about me and that we should keep the spark alive and keep the ember of love going because he still loved me. "We don't have to tell my current girlfriend about our conversations," he suggested to me. All I could think of was how detestable a creature he was He was manipulating my emotions for his own benefit. Even if your ex is confused and not intentionally jerking you around, his actions are causing you grief and anxiety. You do not need that. Stick to NC as best you can.
mr heartbroken Posted September 19, 2009 Posted September 19, 2009 Personally, I find it quite amazing you can be bothered to listen to this guy. He's your EX for a reason & he's clearly messing with your head. I'd go with no contact. I dunno why people insist on prolonging the pain...really. We as in the people that cant understand its over do it because,,,,, and this is just my opinion. We feel there is something worth fighting for. In my case my ex was and still is very mixed up. I never helped with all my questions and pushing her for an answer. its just the time that it takes to understand that your not ment to be.....
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