brock9911 Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 its been 4 months since a messy break up of 8 years. and im thinking of her more now than i have in the whole span of time. i recently was out of commission to all sports and activities because of a broken hand for 6 weeks, and i just got over being bed ridden for a week with a 104 fever, ear, sinus and upper respiratory infections. and you know all i had to do in that time.....THINK. it make me realize how depressed i am alone and how i hate it even if she was the one to f*ck things up. every song, every movie, every gettaway all i think about is how we did that. or that was our destination. or this was our song. ect. 8 years is a sh*t load of memories that just wont fade. "Why do i feel inadequate because of your flaws. all this time i never new who you are. my minds the one who lives in torment. all fingers at me, i am wrong. drink a beer go out with your friends, your the one who played pretend. sneak around, cheat and lie, everyone knew there was another guy or 2 or 3 or 4. thanx to your greed this is no more." if i can only act and feel as strongly as my mind and lyrics spit out
Leia Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 every song, every movie, every gettaway all i think about is how we did that. or that was our destination. or this was our song. ect. 8 years is a sh*t load of memories that just wont fade. I hate that. I hate that everything reminds me of him. I know how you feel. I'm lucky that I get over someone easily. Maybe coz they don't mean much to me. Hang in there.
BeSteady Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 its been 4 months since a messy break up of 8 years. and im thinking of her more now than i have in the whole span of time. i recently was out of commission to all sports and activities because of a broken hand for 6 weeks, and i just got over being bed ridden for a week with a 104 fever, ear, sinus and upper respiratory infections. and you know all i had to do in that time.....THINK. it make me realize how depressed i am alone and how i hate it even if she was the one to f*ck things up. every song, every movie, every gettaway all i think about is how we did that. or that was our destination. or this was our song. ect. 8 years is a sh*t load of memories that just wont fade. "Why do i feel inadequate because of your flaws. all this time i never new who you are. my minds the one who lives in torment. all fingers at me, i am wrong. drink a beer go out with your friends, your the one who played pretend. sneak around, cheat and lie, everyone knew there was another guy or 2 or 3 or 4. thanx to your greed this is no more." if i can only act and feel as strongly as my mind and lyrics spit out When you fever breaks you can still get some exercise even if it is walking. Write now get a piece of paper and pen and Journal to get it our of your head, it helps. You may want to look into consoling and Meds.
Author brock9911 Posted September 16, 2009 Author Posted September 16, 2009 unfortunately when i was sick i still had the cast on so i couldnt exercise or i would sweat and stink up the cast. last thing i need haha. now im back to my handball, racquetball, bowling and hockey, so i will have activities to actually keep my mind active now. otherwise i just stew in my own thoughts. Yeah iv done the therapy and psychiatrist thing for the past 11 years. im done with that. as for writing, thats one thing iv been doing alot lately. that and sketching. but all it seems to do is make me remember whats happened. yeah im letting it out, but its like a permanent reminder. not like im shaking the memories anyway.
Patrice Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 Hey babe, one day at a time ... one baby step at a time. peace.
mr heartbroken Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 nothing that we say will really help you. I am six months since break up. Every song everytime i think of a holiday or even when i crack a joke i always think she would like that one or no she wouldnt. try train your mind ITS NOT THE PERSON YOU MISS "ITS THE LOVE YOU MISS". I know that one day i will love someone else and be loved by someone else. I thought my ex would be this that or the next. she choose not to. Just try and get on with things. people search for the ONE. you can think like that. There isnt just one there could be two or three people in yor life time and you always think at the time this person is the one for me.
Patrice Posted September 16, 2009 Posted September 16, 2009 The ONE thing I've realized about this whole process - you can't hide from the pain of it and you can't be afraid of it either. That's just what is the healthy course of the grieving process. Accept that it is normal and keep moving ahead.
Author brock9911 Posted September 17, 2009 Author Posted September 17, 2009 yeah i understand. iv always been a relationship guy, but this one was for so long, its hard to remember what its like being alone again. god knows i dont miss the bs that we went through in the relationship, but its the lack of having a person there for you. oh well. i actually went back to my psychiatrist yesterday. hopefully back on my daily regiment will get me back on pace. who knows
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