Allthatsloveleigh Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 OK, so I guess maybe I just get myself into weird ambiguous situations, and I didn't have much luck with feedback on the last one, but I'm going to try again. Tonight I went over to my guy friend's apartment - we're friends, but honestly I think that there's potential here for something more. I get the feeling that he's a little interested in me, and when we go out for dinner, appetizers, drinks, etc. he 90% of the time pays for me. He also likes to give me hugs, kisses on the cheek, and is a little touchy-feely. He has also told me that he doesn't date in the traditional sense of the word, that he tends to start out as friends and end up together. So anyways, I'm at his place, and we're just hanging out, talking, listening to music, drinking wine. He mentions that this girl (who I've met before) occasionally crashes at his place. The story is that she lives closer to another town, but she works full time and takes a class close to where he lives, so often she crashes at his place. Supposedly she is romantically interested in one of his friends. In the bathroom the evidence I notice to back up this statement is that there are used tampons in the trash can. I didn't look in the shower or anything to see other evidence though. We hung out for a couple hours, and this girl comes over - and she has a key. She went right into what I presume is his bedroom (it's a studio, so it's the only place a bed or beds could be), and was on her phone, and then after she was done with her conversation she was just hanging otu in here. She had to have seen me when she came in (I saw her), and we've met several times, but she didn't come hang out, even after my friend asked her to. THEN right as I'm leaving, ANOTHER girl came over - and she also had a key. She was a little bit older, I've never met her before, there DEFINITELY wasn't any place for HER to sleep, unless one of the girls is sleeping with my friend...and he was just asking her about work and stuff as he walked me out, and it seemed like she lived there???! He didn't introduce me, tell me who she was or anything. He has definitely never mentioned her before, and I've been over to his place many times. He walked me out of his apartment, and to my car in the parking lot, and stood and chatted for another half hour at least with me, with no mention of this other girl. Seriously, WTF is that, wtf is this situation, and how the hell do I find myself in all these weird ambiguous situations??? I don't get this at all. Oh, and also, I have never taken him up on this offer, but whenever I'm over there and we're drinking, he always lets me know that I can stay there if I have too much to drink. I'm always careful to be able to drive home though - only one or two drinks, and then I switch to water. This time he was very careful to make sure I didn't drink that much - like when he was pouring himself another drink, he started to pour me one too (it would've been my third), but before I could say anything he was like oh, better not, since you're driving.
ReturnToSender Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 I dont know...Im sort of at a loss here. The two of you seem to be friends, and not more than that. His situation with the other women...whatever their role in his life is or what have you, Im not sure why hed need to explain that to you. I guess because I do have male friends who we hang out, have lunch...maybe its a cuban thing but around these parts, everyone hugs and kisses on the cheek to greet and part. also, they feel very wierd having a woman pay their way for anything, so they always pay and I have to force paying the tip or something. But all that together definitely doesnt mean were dating. Especally now since I have a bf..hah! But even when I was single...my male friends well..thats just how they treat a woman, not just the ones they are interested in, but in general. What they do in their personal life or with others never really was a curosity for me...if they want to tell me thats cool but..you know...
Author Allthatsloveleigh Posted September 15, 2009 Author Posted September 15, 2009 Oh that's interesting, I guess I just never thought a guy would pay for me unless he was my bf, my father, or wanted to bone me! I don't necessarily think he should explain other women in his life to me; however, since I perceive him as being interested in me, I don't want to get myself into any messy situations.
ReturnToSender Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 Oh that's interesting, I guess I just never thought a guy would pay for me unless he was my bf, my father, or wanted to bone me! I don't necessarily think he should explain other women in his life to me; however, since I perceive him as being interested in me, I don't want to get myself into any messy situations. LoL! Yeah...I feel you. It happens...some guys really are genuine, and dont have an ulterior motive to rate how they treat a woman. All the same, its good that youre keeping your eyes wide open...definitely nothing wrong with being aware of what is going on with him if you are interested in him romantically. If things become more...keep an eye on those female friends of his. But youd know there are certain things that arent worth being jealous about, since youd know thats just how he is. My bf always pays...always. Lunch, drinks, what have you...for friends, family, females..well, with guys he will split the check but the idea of a woman paying for his meal..no go. I never thought twice about that...its nothing to read into. Now if he wasnt like that, and I foudn out he was treating someone to lunchs and whatnot...then Id lose it!
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