vanilla87 Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 My ex decided about 3 1/2 weeks ago to disappear for the third time for the two years we've been on/off. I don't know what to do anymore. I love him so much, but I'm sick and tired and just want to forget him. I'm devastatingly tempted to text/email/call him because I need him in my life. I just feel as though he doesn't need me in his as much as I thought with his what he did. It seems so selfish and childish in my eyes. He is 28 and I'm 22. I swear it felt like I ended up dealing with a child half the time the first two times. Then this time was different. He was more down to earth and realistic about the relationship. It was so refreshing. I needed it more then ever. It started from may and now sometimes in the last week of august I didn't hear from him and I haven't since then. He is a workaholic, but has very severe medical problems that make him hate it if he misses work. I use to be like mud on a pig on a hot summer day when it came to his health the first tow years, but thats cause of my nursing background makes me react that way. He has some heart conditions and had cancer about a year before I met him too. It was the result from a horrible motorcycle crash that was suppose to have left him dead, but he lived. Here is the big loop hole detail: he doesn't live in the same state as me. So when we got back together, it was a long distance relationship. I live in NY and he lives in FL. He use to live 3-5 hrs from me when he was in NY two years ago. Anyway, I know i should let go and just forget him, but we were engaged at one point two years ago and we made plans for everything. I feel very deeply in love and the only guy I've let get close enough to know almost everything thats possible for a significant other should know. Its been complicated cause I worry about him even though I can't talk to him I do, cause he went into cardiac arrest at one point three months ago and we got into a huge fight about him not telling me and keeping quiet for a week cause he know I would freak out and of course i did more so of him lying to me then the actual situation at hand. *sigh* Its very complicated and I guess I'm here to listen to what people have to say, but also I needed to get it all off my chest or I would explode from the weight of my broken heart. Thanks to anyone that is reading this and willing to leave some feedback...
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