EcstasyX6 Posted September 13, 2009 Posted September 13, 2009 Hello, I'm newly divorced, and definitely gun shy. Right out of the block I meet this tall, sexy, sweet funny, kind, smart guy who's also divorced, raising two kids,(I'm raising two as well), a great dad and is crazy about me. We've been dating for 5 months. We've both said the L word to each other. We enjoy doing a lot of the same things, and he's even mentioned marrying me. Aaaarrrrgghhhhhh! Do I dare even think it? I feel like a teenager when I fell in love the first time. The intimacy if off the hook, beyond beyond belief, off the walls, you name it, we've got it. BTW-He's 40, and I'm 44. Funny...he looks 50, and I look 35. I realize that new sex is always the best sex, and I realize that it just can't stay this hot, or can it? He thinks so. I enjoy his personality and sense of humor. He manages a large number of people where he works. He's fun to converse with, yet serious when need be and insightful in a common sense way. This man has everything that I've been craving so, I should be happy right? However, I find the conversation lacking at times. He talks about the details of his job a lot, which I find interesting, and I like it when he bounces problems off me. My ex and I could converse about anything and everything with ease- we still do. I must say that's the one thing I miss about him. However, our marriage was lacking in all other ways: things in common to a large extent, energy, passion, financial thinking, raising kids....other issues...but I'm not here to talk about that. Be careful what you ask for right, because you just might get it? I'd say my boyfriend 'blue collar' and my x is Exec level. I'm not judging, just giving you a picture. He's cool, chill, and fun overall. My x and I were like 2 misfit puzzle pieces. With my bf, there's a natural chemistry and sense of comfort that I've never experienced. Bottom line is how much with this lack of stimulating conversation be an issue in the long term. I know that I'll have to answer this question for myself, but I wonder how many women have dealt with this issue? It's the common scenario: good looking, tall, hot guy, with street smarts. He's got an edge which I find appealing. He drinks a little...curses a little, but damn he's sweet as hell to me...calls me everyday, and we text like crazy. But I mean, I question if in 10 years, I'll be yawning outside of the bedroom even though we talk about everything except world events, and the universe if you know what I mean. What does that matter if you love a person? I know that you'll never find everything in one person. It's just not possible. He's so different than my x, which is good, but it's scaring me. Do we have enough to form a long term relationship let alone marriage? Is it too early for this? Should I be dating? (but I'm not interested in anyone else, and we both are committed...is it too soon though?) It's a no brainer right?? So happy, but hesitant at the same time... EcstasyX6
mem11363 Posted September 13, 2009 Posted September 13, 2009 Is it that he lacks conversational "range" or conversational "skill"? Do you have many areas of interest that he either lacks knowledge of or interest in? Would he say the same about you? Hello, I'm newly divorced, and definitely gun shy. Right out of the block I meet this tall, sexy, sweet funny, kind, smart guy who's also divorced, raising two kids,(I'm raising two as well), a great dad and is crazy about me. We've been dating for 5 months. We've both said the L word to each other. We enjoy doing a lot of the same things, and he's even mentioned marrying me. Aaaarrrrgghhhhhh! Do I dare even think it? I feel like a teenager when I fell in love the first time. The intimacy if off the hook, beyond beyond belief, off the walls, you name it, we've got it. BTW-He's 40, and I'm 44. Funny...he looks 50, and I look 35. I realize that new sex is always the best sex, and I realize that it just can't stay this hot, or can it? He thinks so. I enjoy his personality and sense of humor. He manages a large number of people where he works. He's fun to converse with, yet serious when need be and insightful in a common sense way. This man has everything that I've been craving so, I should be happy right? However, I find the conversation lacking at times. He talks about the details of his job a lot, which I find interesting, and I like it when he bounces problems off me. My ex and I could converse about anything and everything with ease- we still do. I must say that's the one thing I miss about him. However, our marriage was lacking in all other ways: things in common to a large extent, energy, passion, financial thinking, raising kids....other issues...but I'm not here to talk about that. Be careful what you ask for right, because you just might get it? I'd say my boyfriend 'blue collar' and my x is Exec level. I'm not judging, just giving you a picture. He's cool, chill, and fun overall. My x and I were like 2 misfit puzzle pieces. With my bf, there's a natural chemistry and sense of comfort that I've never experienced. Bottom line is how much with this lack of stimulating conversation be an issue in the long term. I know that I'll have to answer this question for myself, but I wonder how many women have dealt with this issue? It's the common scenario: good looking, tall, hot guy, with street smarts. He's got an edge which I find appealing. He drinks a little...curses a little, but damn he's sweet as hell to me...calls me everyday, and we text like crazy. But I mean, I question if in 10 years, I'll be yawning outside of the bedroom even though we talk about everything except world events, and the universe if you know what I mean. What does that matter if you love a person? I know that you'll never find everything in one person. It's just not possible. He's so different than my x, which is good, but it's scaring me. Do we have enough to form a long term relationship let alone marriage? Is it too early for this? Should I be dating? (but I'm not interested in anyone else, and we both are committed...is it too soon though?) It's a no brainer right?? So happy, but hesitant at the same time... EcstasyX6
Devil Inside Posted September 13, 2009 Posted September 13, 2009 Sounds like you have a lot of chemistry with this guy...that is great. You have been around the block being married once already...so just take you time on this one. Five months is not that long of a time. Have fun....keep dating. However, I would wait before making a big commitment. It would be important to see what your relationship looks like after the newness wears off.
LakesideDream Posted September 13, 2009 Posted September 13, 2009 Don't push the schedule and run him off ! A lot of men, especially single dad's can be VERY gunshy. Take it slow, enjoy the ride. Great luck.
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