northstar1 Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 I find that "a little" off... sounds like he's rushing things a bit... but maybe he just trusts you or didn't want the evening to start too late? Perhaps he's just trying to let you know he trusts you? Yeah, it's A LITTLE weird but I think it would be foolish for us to read too far into it. Just tuck this away as a mental note to cross-reference later on, if that makes sense? Maybe he's just a friendly, laid back dude, but I do find it a bit fast that after a few dates he's already leaving a key.
Author dreamergrl Posted September 14, 2009 Author Posted September 14, 2009 Okay, but that doesn't really answer any of those questions. For all you know, his longest relationship was when he was in high school and it ended after 3 weeks because ... he was clingy (and yet he doesn't know that's the real reason why). Do you see what I'm getting at? Flat out, I'm wondering if he's desperate (for lack of a better word) for a relationship, and like you, is ecstatic at the thought of having met a sane, attractive, fun person. Just move slowly - EMOTIONALLY. You two are already way too close for having met just 72 hours ago. I understand what you're saying, but that's all the information I could offer. I'll agree, that a lot of time was spent together this weekend. I'm not denying that one bit. I'm not sure I'd call it desperate (or maybe I don't want to see it like that because I'd like for a guy to like me for other reasons then he's desperate). I honestly found nothing else strange or off about him though. He's stable, has a good job, owns a nice (very nice) condo, laid back, and we do have a lot in common. So far he follows through when he says he'll do something. I am watching myself at keeping an emotional distance, as we all know I had some major issues getting overly attached right away. I'm rather proud of myself for keeping my eyes out, and watching myself so I don't go back to the cycle I was in.
alphamale Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 Well it is a lap top then you may have to go in at night with one of those ultraviolet lights to find his lair and the "evidence" thereof
Author dreamergrl Posted September 14, 2009 Author Posted September 14, 2009 Maybe he's just a friendly, laid back dude, but I do find it a bit fast that after a few dates he's already leaving a key. Well he didn't offer it to me for good, just for that day.
Author dreamergrl Posted September 14, 2009 Author Posted September 14, 2009 then you may have to go in at night with one of those ultraviolet lights to find his lair and the "evidence" thereof :lmao::lmao: Note to self: Wash hands after using the lap top. Strange enough, I did use it to map out my metro route home.
alphamale Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 Well he didn't offer it to me for good, just for that day. no no thats a little weird, you don't know him from adam yet
carhill Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 Dreamer, if you want to serve a glass of wine with the chicken, and he likes reds, you'll be able to gauge his snobbery or not by serving a well-positioned inexpensive red, like the Fish Eye 03 Merlot. I've found some of the inexpensive reds from our valley and some of the northern valleys adjacent to Napa do pretty good. The hard part is finding them locally. Try Argonaut in your area. I use K&L for most of my stuff but they're in Cali. That Fish Eye should set you back no more than six bucks or so.... Enjoy your dinner
allina Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 I'm going to disagree with everyone. I do not think it's weird for him to offer you to let yourself in and starts cooking. I would do that, especially so I don't have to wait long to eat after work I just don't think it's a big deal. People jump on harmless details too quickly. He just trusts you enough to let you in his apartment and start the food, it's fine! Have fun! Get some good wine.
Star Gazer Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 I understand what you're saying, but that's all the information I could offer. I'll agree, that a lot of time was spent together this weekend. I'm not denying that one bit. I'm not sure I'd call it desperate (or maybe I don't want to see it like that because I'd like for a guy to like me for other reasons then he's desperate). I honestly found nothing else strange or off about him though. He's stable, has a good job, owns a nice (very nice) condo, laid back, and we do have a lot in common. So far he follows through when he says he'll do something. I am watching myself at keeping an emotional distance, as we all know I had some major issues getting overly attached right away. I'm rather proud of myself for keeping my eyes out, and watching myself so I don't go back to the cycle I was in. I didn't mean to imply that he's desperate and that's why he likes you. He'd like you either way. It's just his behavior (and also somewhat yours, I have to say) that comes across as desperate. And like I said, perhaps desperate isn't the right word... over eager might be better. I mean, to you, it feels natural... but to most other people, I think it would feel quite rushed, particularly the key thing, and it causes me to question why he's not taking his time and jumping head first into a pool of which he does not know the depth. You too. That all having been said, he sounds like a genuinely good guy. Who knows, maybe this is just the heavens' way of having things all work out?
allina Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 Ok sorry carhill but I veto your wine suggestion!!! No no no ewww! DG, if you want to go cheap red get some Coppla Rosso. It's great with heavier food and everyone likes it. Personally I would recommend anything Ghost Pines or Kenwood, good, reasonably priced wines.
Star Gazer Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 Well he didn't offer it to me for good, just for that day. Yeah, but that's exactly how I got my key to my boyfriend's place... the sneaky, "I'll just give you this so you can let yourself in if I haven't gotten there yet" trick. I've slept in my own bed about 5 times since!
BobSacamento Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 Just go with the flow and be optimistic. I don't see anything negative about getting a spare key. Better make something big because 4 hours to make sloppy joes might not cut it.
Author dreamergrl Posted September 15, 2009 Author Posted September 15, 2009 Dreamer, if you want to serve a glass of wine with the chicken, and he likes reds, you'll be able to gauge his snobbery or not by serving a well-positioned inexpensive red, like the Fish Eye 03 Merlot. I've found some of the inexpensive reds from our valley and some of the northern valleys adjacent to Napa do pretty good. The hard part is finding them locally. Try Argonaut in your area. I use K&L for most of my stuff but they're in Cali. That Fish Eye should set you back no more than six bucks or so.... Enjoy your dinner I don't know if I could drink something called fish eye :lmao::lmao: I'm going to disagree with everyone. I do not think it's weird for him to offer you to let yourself in and starts cooking. I would do that, especially so I don't have to wait long to eat after work I just don't think it's a big deal. People jump on harmless details too quickly. He just trusts you enough to let you in his apartment and start the food, it's fine! Have fun! Get some good wine. Well it's going to take at least an hour to cook. Plus I have to get everything after work, so I'd only be there maybe an hour or two without him.
carhill Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 Ok sorry carhill but I veto your wine suggestion!!! No no no ewww! DG, if you want to go cheap red get some Coppla Rosso. It's great with heavier food and everyone likes it. Personally I would recommend anything Ghost Pines or Kenwood, good, reasonably priced wines. That's pretty brutal, dontcha think? You probably don't like Steele either
alphamale Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 i think you two need to put the brakes on here
northstar1 Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 Myself, if I'm having chicken, I'd want a nice chard, like sterling vinyards. but ofcourse, it's all a personal taste and what sauce you are making with the chicken.
Star Gazer Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 Ok sorry carhill but I veto your wine suggestion!!! No no no ewww! DG, if you want to go cheap red get some Coppla Rosso. It's great with heavier food and everyone likes it. That's a good one. I'd also recommend a 2007 Seghesio Zinfandel. It's my absolute favorite wine... maybe a little more than you want to spend (about $20-25) but WELL WORTH it and I PROMISE it will impress your little wine snob boy.
allina Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 That's pretty brutal, dontcha think? You probably don't like Steele either Naah not brutal Steel Reserve? I prefer a King Cobra if I'm going to be ghetto about my booze DG bring condoms and enjoy yourself
Author dreamergrl Posted September 15, 2009 Author Posted September 15, 2009 I didn't mean to imply that he's desperate and that's why he likes you. He'd like you either way. It's just his behavior (and also somewhat yours, I have to say) that comes across as desperate. And like I said, perhaps desperate isn't the right word... over eager might be better. I mean, to you, it feels natural... but to most other people, I think it would feel quite rushed, particularly the key thing, and it causes me to question why he's not taking his time and jumping head first into a pool of which he does not know the depth. You too. That all having been said, he sounds like a genuinely good guy. Who knows, maybe this is just the heavens' way of having things all work out? I guess it comes across as some what natural to me because my one healthy relationship started very close to this (not the key thing), and I know it's not why it didn't work out between me and that ex. I can see why people would see it as rushed though. But I don't agree with the desperate part, or lack of better word. I can say I don't feel like he's a clingy person. We just kind of went with how the day ended up for us. Time will tell I'll maintain a healthy emotional distance until I know him better. I'll keep it all in mind. But as of right now, nothing feels off, and I want to trust my instincts.
Star Gazer Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 Myself, if I'm having chicken, I'd want a nice chard, like sterling vinyards. Red sauce, my friend. Red sauce.
allina Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 Well it's going to take at least an hour to cook. Plus I have to get everything after work, so I'd only be there maybe an hour or two without him. So not a big deal, I think it'll be fun. Then, once he gets some you can enjoy the food and each other Like I said, I would totally offer up a key in this situation too.
Author dreamergrl Posted September 15, 2009 Author Posted September 15, 2009 Just go with the flow and be optimistic. I don't see anything negative about getting a spare key. Better make something big because 4 hours to make sloppy joes might not cut it. Nope, spaghetti and chicken. Trying to decide on what type of bread. I don't want too much garlic, as I enjoy kissing him Myself, if I'm having chicken, I'd want a nice chard, like sterling vinyards. but ofcourse, it's all a personal taste and what sauce you are making with the chicken. Well it's going to be a red sauce. Ooo should I have a veggie? That's a good one. I'd also recommend a 2007 Seghesio Zinfandel. It's my absolute favorite wine... maybe a little more than you want to spend (about $20-25) but WELL WORTH it and I PROMISE it will impress your little wine snob boy. I swear, he's not snobby! I'm going to have to write all these down and do some pre dinner day research. Naah not brutal Steel Reserve? I prefer a King Cobra if I'm going to be ghetto about my booze DG bring condoms and enjoy yourself Ha, maybe I'll just bring some good old Milwaukees Best Beer (oh yes, I remember those high school days of thinking we were so cool drinking cheap beer). Why does everyone think I'm going to sleep with him!?! Hey, at least I'm not pressured for sex - that says something good about him!
stefspets Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 If you're going to bring cheap beer, go with Miller High Life Light. It's the (light) champagne of beers. And the bottles look so cool...
Author dreamergrl Posted September 15, 2009 Author Posted September 15, 2009 If you're going to bring cheap beer, go with Miller High Life Light. It's the (light) champagne of beers. And the bottles look so cool... I can't bring myself to bring cheap beer. I like Fat Tire and New Castle though. I'm not huge on beer for the most part.
Star Gazer Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 I repeat: 2007 Seghesio Zinfandel (Are you reading this, Allina?) Buy it for yourself even, you won't be disappointed. As for beer, I'm a pansy. Blue Moon all the way.
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