Isolde Posted September 12, 2009 Posted September 12, 2009 I seriously doubt that you would have to leave Scotland to find a great girl for you. Do you live in a midsized or large city? Have you tried volunteering for a charity or organizing social events? Co-ed sports teams? Do you approach women in bookstores and cafes? From what I remember you haven't been single all that long. As TBF said... it does take time. I've never been in a relationship before and I'm about your age.
Isolde Posted September 12, 2009 Posted September 12, 2009 But if he is already lamenating that most women don't meet his expectations, I am not very motivated to try myself either. Because he is starting off with something negative, not positive to work towards. I have to say this is very true. Alternatively look at it this way. Some women might be amazing but not be amazing or right for YOU. But if you appreciate them platonically, you will feel positive energy radiating through you. The more you appreciate people in general, the more of this potential energy will become romantic energy, when meeting girls you're interested in.
lino Posted September 13, 2009 Posted September 13, 2009 I don't necessarily want an amazing woman. A normal one is enough for me but even that is not easy to find. Too many of them think they are amazing when in actual fact they are far from that!
Rudderless Posted September 13, 2009 Posted September 13, 2009 From being where you are, to these days not being where you are, if you have to ask a question like that, you're what's known as "unsociable". It's not really a coincidence that when you come to an internet forum where people speak openly about themselves you find yourself intrigued by some of them. Now try doing this in real life because it's no different.
Trialbyfire Posted September 13, 2009 Posted September 13, 2009 "Amazing" is subjective. I think my fiance's amazing but that's because we mesh so well on so many levels, from foundational/core beliefs, to a similar sense of humour.
loveslife Posted September 13, 2009 Posted September 13, 2009 I think there are many, many, many, many amazing people in the world. The trick is that before you can recognize anyone as amazing you have to see the person staring back at you in the mirror as amazing. We see others through the filter of how we see ourselves.
Brady_to_Moss Posted September 13, 2009 Posted September 13, 2009 I don't necessarily want an amazing woman. A normal one is enough for me but even that is not easy to find. Too many of them think they are amazing when in actual fact they are far from that! I agree 100% with all you have said. It seems impossible for me to find someone who is normal enough for me around here...lots of girls think they are amazing..but..like you said..are far from it
ReturnToSender Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 I don't necessarily want an amazing woman. A normal one is enough for me but even that is not easy to find. Too many of them think they are amazing when in actual fact they are far from that! I agree 100% with all you have said. It seems impossible for me to find someone who is normal enough for me around here...lots of girls think they are amazing..but..like you said..are far from it I dont think the point is to find someone who thinks *they* are amazing so much as someone who *you* think is amazing.
Trialbyfire Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 We see others through the filter of how we see ourselves.I agree when it comes to core values and beliefs. When it comes to more trivial traits, there's no one on the face of this earth, who is your identical twin. Many of the trivial traits will be complementary, in compatible couples.
looking4 green grass Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 Im amazing! Hah...I dont generally feel that way, but all my ex's tell me how wonderful and amazing I was, what a wonderful gf/wife I was, how genuine I was. Bad for me...they all for one reason or another end up cheating on me. Good thing for them...in all my serious relationships, because of my encouragement to go back to school/go for that promotion/work on something thevey been putting off of unsure about/what have you...they always end up in a much better position once Im gone. So yeah, if you want a boost in your career or financial situation drop me a line...Ive got that midas touch... We are obviously the same human being in two different locations.
looking4 green grass Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 I'm more focused on normal rather than amazing these days. I'd even take "mostly normal" or "approaching normal" or "leaning towards the normal side of things" I'll let you know how that works out. I do, however, think there are LOTS of amazing people in this world, but we aren't all compatible romantically with who we find to be amazing.
Art_Critic Posted September 14, 2009 Posted September 14, 2009 I have always found my success in finding a good woman was to stop looking... Go about my life and only concern myself with my life.. investing time in myself seems to change the outward look I present and women come a flocking when I'm emotionally healthy and I feel good and I like my life the way it is.. Of course I'm not single so I'm speaking of the past.. Even my wife who I met on match.. I wasn't even looking to date anybody and only joined match to have something to do and find some people to speak to besides the people on LS .. We started to talk and emailed for a couple of weeks and then learned that we knew each other in real life.. she was a client of mine who I had worked with over the years. If I had been looking I can guarantee you that it would've never happened. Sit back SB.. relax and go about your life and hobbies and one will show up that you never saw before..
Lish Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 I'm finding it really hard to meet a lady who ticks most of the boxes. I'm 6'3'', 24, from Scotland I'm content with life. -warm,fun,caring,honest & positive.. I'm not your 'average guy' ... I do a lot of different things and have had a very unusual and exciting life so far..... I'm greatful for all the experiences in my life. It'll take someone very genuine, unique and special.... But where is she? here? Ooooh, Scottish huh? I did long distance (well, I saw him every weekend) with a guy on the east coast of Scotland for 2yrs. It's so cute when you guys use your own made up words haha. Call me?
CaliGuy Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 I'm wondering the same thing. I think the more amazing you are, the harder it is to find someone. Then I must be super-duper-amazing!!!! Nah, I don't think that's it. I think if you're confident, sincere and a good person, you'll have decent luck. I think people should spend more time of self-reflection and understanding and loving who they are instead of trying to figure out what's wrong with everyone else. I think if you do that, the right person will find you.
CarrieT Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 Then I must be super-duper-amazing!!!! Nah, I don't think that's it. I think if you're confident, sincere and a good person, you'll have decent luck. I think people should spend more time of self-reflection and understanding and loving who they are instead of trying to figure out what's wrong with everyone else. I think if you do that, the right person will find you. You and me both, CG!
fabulous_chk Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 My amazing guy was handed to me on a platter when I didn't even want a relationship. Be single for a while, my bear. Enjoy it while you can. When you stop looking that's when they appear out of the blue.
joseffrost Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 London can be a cruel place my friend - I've been here four years and haven't found anything meaningful with a London girl. Then again, if you are looking for something less meaningful, this city is positively bursting at the seams...
CaliGuy Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 You and me both, CG! I think we should start our own "Super-duper Amazing" club. Let's play rock/paper/scissors for who gets to be the Pres-di-dent!
Recommended Posts