cognac Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 Wow, i met a girl at school and we are partners for a class. First thing she did was start talking to me (something girls rarely do to me), opening a conversation. We got along really well, she was laughing at all my stupid jokes, showing what seemed like OBVIOUS indicators of interest. It gets even better, she told me to call her to help her with the report but she did most of the work and just sent it to me. She called me every 30 minutes, and even called me the next morning with a "Good morning darling". But here's where I get confused. Yesterday we were talking as usual and i asked her if she wanted to get a pizza. I knew she had nothing to do but she made up some excuse and said "NEXT TIME". She is a few years years older than me and when I told her my age she kind of made a face but her interest didn't subside that much. She told me after rejecting me to call or text her about the "project". Then she texted me about something I mentioned earlier and I couldnt respond because i dont have texting on my phone , so i emailed her saying to give me her AOL screename. Now I am confused as ****, should i just give up or give it another shot?
espec10001 Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 Sounds like a frisky puddy cat. Are you attracted to her?
Author cognac Posted September 11, 2009 Author Posted September 11, 2009 Sounds like a frisky puddy cat. Are you attracted to her? At first she was a so-so to me, passable looks but not really what most guys would say is "HOT", but when a girl is as nice, treats me as kindly and understands me as much as this one, it makes her into a 10 into my eyes. I was really sick the last day I saw her, and looked really crappy/uglier than usual, and yet she didn't ease up her interest she still treated me like she was into me. I've never met a girl like this in my entire life. Do you have any idea what I should do? I have too much pride to ask her to go out with me again.
boogieboy Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 I just went though that last semester. Keep it in your head that she is just being really friendly so she can get the homework done with a partner. Doesnt mean she likes you. If she wont go out with you, she probably has a bf.
Author cognac Posted September 11, 2009 Author Posted September 11, 2009 I just went though that last semester. Keep it in your head that she is just being really friendly so she can get the homework done with a partner. Doesnt mean she likes you. If she wont go out with you, she probably has a bf. Yes, that's what I initially thought. But here's the kicker, I'm lazy so she does almost all my work for me, and gets worried when I procrastinate on my own projects. She hasn't mentioned a boyfriend to me at all, but I would be really frustrated if she did have one. I really would prefer if all women who are not interested in me romantically were bitches and rude, instead of girls like this causing me to dig her a lot with all her kindness and damsel in distressism. The other night she kept saying "IM SO COLD", i made nothing out of it, and then realized what she wanted after she repeated it a few more times, and gave her my jacket, she put it on, is this a good sign? I've been acting super cool and confident on the surface, but it really did bother me a bit when she didnt go with me to get food. If she does have a boyfriend she is quite a FLIRT.
Author cognac Posted September 11, 2009 Author Posted September 11, 2009 Any more advice? Now that I think about it, at the beginning of the year I think I saw her kissing a guy at the door. The guy looked like a total dirtbag devoid of any intelligence or class, so I assume that was her boyfriend. Haven't seen him since though. I'm leaning towards forgetting about her and just trying to get through the semester ignoring her firting. What a shame, in a different society/world/period of history, something beautiful could've come out of this.
espec10001 Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 If it were me I'd say it would all depend on how attracted to her I was. If I was really attracted to her, when you asked her out she said "next time", and to me that would be a sign to "try a little harder". Find out first if she's got a boyfriend or husband. If she doesn't, then that's a green light for you to make the moves "IF YOU REALLY WANT HER". If she does have a bf or husband, forget her.
Author cognac Posted September 11, 2009 Author Posted September 11, 2009 If it were me I'd say it would all depend on how attracted to her I was. If I was really attracted to her, when you asked her out she said "next time", and to me that would be a sign to "try a little harder". Find out first if she's got a boyfriend or husband. If she doesn't, then that's a green light for you to make the moves "IF YOU REALLY WANT HER". If she does have a bf or husband, forget her. I am and I'm not. If the guy I saw is her boyfriend, I am not attracted to her, I would never want to be with a girl who would date a guy like the one I saw (which means i wouldn't date most women). Damn am I confused. I would be happy just having sex with her and forgetting about her at this point. Any girl who makes it this difficult to simply share a meal with me is not worth my time.
boogieboy Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 Any girl who makes it this difficult to simply share a meal with me is not worth my time. If she really liked you she would have suggested another time and went out of her way to hang with you. Anything that isnt a yes is a no. Women dont want to deal with the guilt, so they will never tell you anything straight up. You will have to deal with this all your life. So the first sign of disinterest you back off. Dont think you have to try harder. I had a girl in a class in the summer who seemed to keep looking at me while I was sitting next to her. Turned out she was just fidgedy. She did have a BF, so that wasnt happening. When I asked her to join me at the cafe before class, she said no. Her reasoning was "I cant park on the street before 6, and my parking deck pass is expired". Well I knew that was crap. I left her alone after that. Low and behold, a week later, when she needed help studying for the exam, she offered to show up early to the cafe and have my coffee ready for me when I got there. I told her "Nope, cant help ya". Felt good. I wasnt gonna get used.
Javelin Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 Cognac, I know it's frustrating and confusing at the same time, but if you really like this girl; then you need to play into her game, but you'll eventually have to take the lead at some point. If what you say about the flirting is true, then it's obvious that she is interested in getting to know you better. A lady won't just wear any guy's jacket without some form of interest. So don't get discouraged because she's turned you down once, because seriously, pizza isn't all that interesting anyway! I'd suggest moving conversations away from school work and get some info out of her on whether or not she's single! Also, instead of asking her out to just pizza, setup a study date and order some of her favorite take out. Be creative.
Author cognac Posted September 12, 2009 Author Posted September 12, 2009 If she really liked you she would have suggested another time and went out of her way to hang with you. Anything that isnt a yes is a no. Women dont want to deal with the guilt, so they will never tell you anything straight up. You will have to deal with this all your life. So the first sign of disinterest you back off. Dont think you have to try harder. I had a girl in a class in the summer who seemed to keep looking at me while I was sitting next to her. Turned out she was just fidgedy. She did have a BF, so that wasnt happening. When I asked her to join me at the cafe before class, she said no. Her reasoning was "I cant park on the street before 6, and my parking deck pass is expired". Well I knew that was crap. I left her alone after that. Low and behold, a week later, when she needed help studying for the exam, she offered to show up early to the cafe and have my coffee ready for me when I got there. I told her "Nope, cant help ya". Felt good. I wasnt gonna get used. She said something random like "definitely next time" . I wasn't sure if she was flaking on me or not. I know it's frustrating and confusing at the same time, but if you really like this girl; then you need to play into her game, but you'll eventually have to take the lead at some point. If what you say about the flirting is true, then it's obvious that she is interested in getting to know you better. A lady won't just wear any guy's jacket without some form of interest. So don't get discouraged because she's turned you down once, because seriously, pizza isn't all that interesting anyway! [/Quote] I really don't know what her deal is. When something is too good to be true (IE, a girl interested in me when i have nothing to offer her, IE no car , no money, i cant even do her homework) there is usually a catch. I can't tell what she wants out of me. I'd suggest moving conversations away from school work and get some info out of her on whether or not she's single! Also, instead of asking her out to just pizza, setup a study date and order some of her favorite take out.[/Quote] We were talking about other stuff on the phone during our work, but she hung up kind of early. She later confessed she cut our conversation short because her friends were smoking pot and she couldn't resist. I could never ask her out that brashly because ihave to be her partner for school all semester. I couldn't deal with a flat out rejection because i have a lot of pride and i would feel really pathetic with this individual next to me for 3 months. I have decided to just give up on this tease, i dont play games. This is stressing me out way more than it should (especially considering the fact that she probably doesnt think twice about me), while it's probably just an ego-boost for her (she isn't that great looking). I'm going to stick with strip clubs, it's a lot more fun and women are open about their intentions.
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