boredtom Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 Okay so I'm going to stop contacting my ex. How long do you think its going to take for her to start to miss me. we have never gone 2 full days without talking to each other. Last time I waited for her to contact me, on the second day she called me like 6 times saying that she missed talking to me. But I messed up and got into an argument. What should I do if she calls me or texts me, I'm only doing this so she can get her space and think about what she really wants. I also want her back really bad. So on which day of NC did your ex contact you? Any stories, and how long did it take for her to see that she made a mistake (if that happened).
GrayClouds Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 Okay so I'm going to stop contacting my ex. How long do you think its going to take for her to start to miss me. we have never gone 2 full days without talking to each other. Last time I waited for her to contact me, on the second day she called me like 6 times saying that she missed talking to me. But I messed up and got into an argument. What should I do if she calls me or texts me, I'm only doing this so she can get her space and think about what she really wants. I also want her back really bad. So on which day of NC did your ex contact you? Any stories, and how long did it take for her to see that she made a mistake (if that happened). NC is not a game to play to manipulate someone. Here is how to get them back: So you want a second chance?
Author boredtom Posted September 11, 2009 Author Posted September 11, 2009 Sorry I does look like I'm trying to manipulate her. But what I'm trying to say is that I'm doing this for me to heal and for her to think about what she really wants, because as I said in my other thread she fell for someone else but doesn't know if she wants to move on from me. Well anyways, what I meant was if she does contact me and wants to get back together I am going to say yes but take it slowly and try to work things out. I was just curious about what time she is going to start to miss me, and if someone else had any stories on what day their ex contacted them.
adamt Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 NC is for yourself and not to get your ex back. She may miss you but then she may not miss you. She may or may not contact you. NC helps get you in a better place and recover as quick as possible. You need to stop answering and returning calls, she know she has you in her pocket. Unless she wants to work on the relationship it is not doing you any good to responf or amswer calls,
Author boredtom Posted September 11, 2009 Author Posted September 11, 2009 Yeah I've been thinking a lot and I feel wayy better and I'm not going to answer them I know that if I do answer them I'm just going to get hurt again. I'm been working on my flaws and just been thinking about everything and I know why she left, I would of left the first month of dating me. But I am really trying to work on my problems for any future relationship. NC seems like the best option for me. I want to get better so I can then show her my new me and if she still doesn't want me after I'm just going to move on.
countingufosagain Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 Hey Tom, If you're looking to get back with your ex NC is a starting point. I think you should then consider if this is what you truly want or is it a snap reaction from the feeling of rejection. NC works for me because I don't lose my dignity and however the relationship resolves itself I'm better for it. To directly answer your question, I institute NC after all break ups and have had ex's come back after a few days to a couple months and some not at all. The results vary on the person and the situation. There all kinds of intangibles that will ultimately determine the end result. My suggestion is to keep yourself occupied and stop panicking. This is to help you from making the situation worse. Do what you have always wanted to do and experience life. Your brain is on fight or flight mode which is a normal reaction to the situation and will make you act out of desperation which will only repel your ex. Get control of our emotions, understand that you're not in a threatened position, and decide that no matter the outcome you will be happy. I wish you all the best in your road to recovery or reconciliation.
RYKR Posted September 11, 2009 Posted September 11, 2009 This might sound harsh, no doubt she probably be thinking and even missing you, but in most cases she had already moved on and will never come back. It's best to go cold turkey NC, forget about her and move on. NC is for yourself, not to create false hopes and think something might happen on her side. It's time to think of yourself, I mean who else will? Why cry over spilled milk? Time will heal everything, it's the only method.
ladymistique Posted September 15, 2009 Posted September 15, 2009 I know that it's tough but NC is not a magic solution to getting an ex back. Similarly, there is no set amount of time in which your ex will initiate contact with you. As mentioned in a few posts above, some exes will come back, some won't and some will contact you not to reconcile but for some other inane and unhelpful reason. I had exes come back after years of no contact and I had some not re-emerge at all. NC is about protecting yourself from any potential mindgames that arise in a breakup, getting your life back and not giving you more fodder to over-analyze. Stay strong and your recovery will occur without you realizing it. I am currently two and half months NC and it gets easier, although I do have my less than stellar moments.
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