Guys, have u ever been madly in love with a woman then lose interest after few months

[carhill]

I'm of two minds.... one says the first R affected him emotionally in a way where he doesn't invest as deeply or quickly, making an exit easier and less painful. The other says he learned in his first R what he really wants and, if not experiencing that with a partner at a certain point, he exits.

[conehead]

He said the first time he dumped her because she said he wasn't marriage material and that broke this heart. They got back together then he dumped her again for good a second time for I'm not sure why.

 

My ex bf also once said he is deathly afraid of divorce.

 

I will never know.

[carhill]

My ex bf also once said he is deathly afraid of divorce.

 

As someone going through it, I'd opine he's a pretty smart fella.

 

As to the rest, I can share, if a woman I loved and was committed to ever said that to me, it would not only have hurt me from the rejection standpoint, but been a major blow to self-esteem, because being 'marriage material' entails a lot of essential components of who I am.

 

If he's young, and this happened, and he was emotionally engaged, I could see that doing damage. Damage he could heal from, but the scars would always be there.

[conehead]

As someone going through it, I'd opine he's a pretty smart fella.

 

As to the rest, I can share, if a woman I loved and was committed to ever said that to me, it would not only have hurt me from the rejection standpoint, but been a major blow to self-esteem, because being 'marriage material' entails a lot of essential components of who I am.

 

If he's young, and this happened, and he was emotionally engaged, I could see that doing damage. Damage he could heal from, but the scars would always be there.

 

This happened when he was in college so yes he was rather young. And I know what you mean, it would really hurt me too if someone I loved said that to me. He said that at the time she said it to him out of impulse because they had a fight and she took it back, which is probably why they got back together. But I guess even if it was said out of anger it can hurt.

[You'reasian]

If so, what was the reason? Assuming she didn't do anything drastic like cheat, lie, or whatever and wasn't crazy... and you were genuinely crazy about her. How can you lose interest after just 4-6 months or so?

 

What was it about the girl that made you lose interest?

 

I need to know

 

When women don't make time for guys that are interested in them, try to make guys play chase etc. some guys loose a little steam from their interest.

 

This is just an educated guess. You're best off having a heart to heart conversation with this guy and finding out on your own.

[conehead]

When women don't make time for guys that are interested in them, try to make guys play chase etc. some guys loose a little steam from their interest.

 

This is just an educated guess. You're best off having a heart to heart conversation with this guy and finding out on your own.

 

If you read the rest of my thread, I already had a heart to heart convo with him.

[Pink Cupcakes]

To be honest, it sounds like you may cause too much drama and it scares the guys off.

[conehead]

To be honest, it sounds like you may cause too much drama and it scares the guys off.

 

What drama are u speaking of?

[Pink Cupcakes]

I don't know, but it is the reaction that men have when they are realizing that there is too much drama. For example, calling every day (let him do all the pursuing), getting upset over him not calling, etc.?

[conehead]

I don't know, but it is the reaction that men have when they are realizing that there is too much drama. For example, calling every day (let him do all the pursuing), getting upset over him not calling, etc.?

 

Well the calling thing doesn't quite apply to me as my ex bf initiated calls 80% of the time and he called me at least once a day. That was never an issue with us.

[likestolaugh]

conehead, you need to stop making all these threads looking for validation. You need to realize that your ex isn't going to change his mind, that the sex (even if he didn't say it) had a huge part to play in why he did what he did... and that you need to move on and find someone who shares your values.

 

 

comprendo?

[conehead]

conehead, you need to stop making all these threads looking for validation. You need to realize that your ex isn't going to change his mind, that the sex (even if he didn't say it) had a huge part to play in why he did what he did... and that you need to move on and find someone who shares your values.

 

 

comprendo?

 

Thank you! That's all I needed to know really, that it was the sex mainly. I also want to stop driving myself crazy, sometimes thinking that yes it was just the sex and I just need to find someone who shares my values, and other times thinking oh no it was not the sex and that there are things really wrong with my personality or my habits etc.

 

As for moving on, I am, but I know myself well enough that it talkes me well a month before I can truly truly get over it. It's been 3 weeks after the breakup so I'm close to moving on, don't worry

[conehead]

ok LSers thanks for everyone's input, im gonna get off this board for some time to clear my head. I've come to terms with why we broke up thanks for everyon'es insights and I'm over and done with it. Thank you all. I'm going to get back on track with my life now

[Pink Cupcakes]

Sounds like you dodged a bullet with this one. Good job sticking to your guns and not ending up with the guy getting what he's after and then moving on to the next chick.

Guys who really are interested, it doesn't matter about how quickly they have sex.