kostoronto Posted September 9, 2009 Posted September 9, 2009 It's been a while, but I have a question for you fine folks. Here's the back story: I met a girl this summer [all of the best stories start that way, eh? haha] and we hit it off right away. We met back in early July and we were a couple within a week of knowing each other. We spent everyday together for over a month. She told me she loves me and I love her, and she went back home [she was here for the summer]. I visited her and I got to meet her boyfriend from back home. She told me they were in an open relationship, yet she made me swear that I would never let him know that we had anything. They seemed really close and I felt like I was just a summer fling. She still insists that she loves me and what not. That we should have known each other our entire lives...yadadada...I can tell you anything...blah blah blah. My question: Is she just confused? Or am I just a summer fling? She has told me time and time again that she expects me to be her friend for the rest of her life. She's moving back to where I live in about two years and her boyfriend will remain in his town, another country. Should I just live my life and wait for her to break up with her boyfriend? Or should I just forget about her and get rid of any emotional attachment to her? As you can probably tell, I'm awfully confused myself.
New Again Posted September 9, 2009 Posted September 9, 2009 I say forget about her. Don't wait around for her. Also, my understanding of open relationships is that they are OPEN, and that includes honesty. But her bf isn't supposed to know about you? I'm sure the dynamics depends on the couples involved, but that would make me go "huh"? Did you know she was in an "open" relationship when you met her? Is being in an "open" relationship (or being the other guy) something you want to do?
Author kostoronto Posted September 9, 2009 Author Posted September 9, 2009 She didn't tell me until it was a little too late haha. And I don't believe they're in an open relationship. I think it was more of "It's summer, I'm in another country for three months, etc." type of thing. I'm not going to wait around for her. I'll be wheeling the ladies left, right, and centre haha, but every time I talk to a girl, I can't help but think how much better the other girl is. I really miss her. I'm sure once I rebound a few times I'll be over her. I just can't wait until she breaks up with her boyfriend, comes home, and we can be together again. Until then...local hoes will have to do hahaha
New Again Posted September 9, 2009 Posted September 9, 2009 Oh OK good. I didn't want to come right out and call her a liar and a cheater, but I guess you know what's up so....she's a liar and a cheater = bleh You'll get over her and won't even remember her in two years.
Author kostoronto Posted September 9, 2009 Author Posted September 9, 2009 I don't really mind the cheating thing. I would never engage in a long distance relationship with her, though, that's for sure. If we lived in the same city, together, and she was a bit older, that's the only way I would ever go for it. ^ which is not out of the realm of possibility. gawt dayum, I need to stop that
New Again Posted September 9, 2009 Posted September 9, 2009 The "cheating thing" should bother you...
Author kostoronto Posted September 9, 2009 Author Posted September 9, 2009 Oh, it bothers me, but not that much because it doesn't affect me right now. If I were her bf, I wouldn't be with her.
New Again Posted September 9, 2009 Posted September 9, 2009 It does affect you - she wasn't really your gf; she was someone else's gf. She's a liar. You know she is. You also know she's a cheater. How could you ever trust her? Aside from that, it affects her real bf. Doesn't that bother you at all? It doesn't bother you that she lied to you all summer?
Author kostoronto Posted September 9, 2009 Author Posted September 9, 2009 Meh, sure, she lied about her status with her boyfriend; however, I had the time of my life this summer. Maybe that's all she was meant to be - a summer fling.
Kamille Posted September 9, 2009 Posted September 9, 2009 If I were her bf, I wouldn't be with her. The more I try to wrap my head around this statement, the more I feel like I am in some kind space-time warp zone.
Author kostoronto Posted September 9, 2009 Author Posted September 9, 2009 The more I try to wrap my head around this statement, the more I feel like I am in some kind space-time warp zone. If I were her current bf, aka not me, I wouldn't stay with her. I wouldn't trust her at the stage she's at in her life. She's a serial polygamist. She admits it. She's a great time, I love her, but would I want to be in a committed relationship with her? Nooooo. Maybe when she's older.
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